9:00 am

Go to the local bar

9:15 am-12:30 pm

Consume 4 beers

12:45 pm

Accept a $50 bet that you cant do 9 beers and 9 hot dogs in 9 innings…..also known as the PG bet

2:45 pm…5th inning

Ask yourself why you agreed to do this bet as you barely swallow your fifth hot dog

4:00 pm…8th inning

Throw-up on your buddy and laugh

4:15 pm

Black out and don’t remember the next 45 minutes

5:00 pm

Wake up from your black out and wonder how you got inside the Hockey Town cafe

5:30 pm

Can’t drive home because you’re severely inebriated. Hockeytown just kicked you out because you peed on yourself. You are forced to call your girlfriend.

6:00 pm

Girlfriend drives you home and breaks up with you because this isn’t the first time you peed on yourself in public(or private for that matter)

9:00

Realize you have a morning hangover but its only 9 pm

11:00 pm

You are watching the local news as they talk about opening day and the fans who get out of control. As they are about to go to video, you start to remember those lost 45 minutes.

11:01 pm

Look on in horror as you see your naked butt on Tv

12:00 am – 7:00 am

Receive the obligatory 50 text messages and phone calls from your buddies laughing at you.

7:15 am
Boss calls and says don’t bother showing up to work. You’re fired for embarrassing the company

9:00 am

Reality smacks you in the face. In a 24 hour span, you lost your job, your girlfriend and your self-respect. You tell yourself that it won’t happen again. You make sure you remember this by writing in your journal.

9:01 am

Suprisingly, the last entry you made in this journal is titled “2007 Opening Day”: There are only four lines written from that day

-Don’t get drunk
-Don’t get suckered into the 9 inning bet
-Don’t moon the crowd
-Don’t pee on yourself

1 Year Later……2009 Opening Day

Repeat Cycle

*I can’t believe I have to point this out but this story is fiction. While the picture is from a real event in 2005, it has nothing to do with this story.