Ever since being dumped by Cristiano Ronaldo, Nereida Gallardo has been pretty much been seen wearing nothing but a bikini bottom (as she should be doing, by the way).

I am not sure if she is trying to make Cristiano jealous or miss what he had, but whatever message she is trying to send, I have one in return: “Miss Gallardo, I will marry you today. No questions asked. You don’t even have to speak to me. Ever. Just let me accompany you to the beach once in a while and have a little motorboat now and then and I will support you for the rest of your life.”

To view the rest of Nereida Gallardo’s pokie-riffic photos, click here.