I am easily confused but fortunately, helpful people exist to keep me from doing silly things. Like feeding inanimate objects.

Man, that sign really helped me out. Otherwise I would have just been throwing peanuts at his mouth, staring at him and going, “WHYYYYY!!?!??!” And I probably would have punched him and hurt my fist, disappointed in how my attempts to solicit his attention with food failed yet again. It’d be just like my trip to feed the starving Ethiopians all over again.

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