From the premiere of Soulmen, the Sam Jackson/Bernie Mac/Isaac Hayes film (also known as the official fall film of dead black dudes).

So, couple guesses as to what that is? The obvious answer would be a couple sprays of hot Ice T jizz, second place would be stains from a big ass dinner of ribs (you don’t get an ass like that without eating some copious amounts of pork). But what I actually think is that it’s probably a nice couple dabs of breast sweat. Think about it…those things are huge and probably as hard as a skull. It’s probably like being an Army guy and carrying around that forty pound backpack, only in the form of two sort-of sexy, sort-of gross globes.

Or it’s rain. Don’t ruin this for me, you Encyclopedia Brown bastards.