Guyism

Churches are reasonable

More from Chris Spags

From the Thomas Road Baptist Church comes this little treat. Meet Diane. She’s going to hell.

Dancing, and dancing alone, may seem like a small thing, but the church is right…it’s a step towards much bigger problems. Like when you’re dancing in a bar, you’ve got your drink in your hand, and then, all of a sudden, you find yourself falling onto a series of erect penises belonging to strange men. That happens to everyone, right? The guy on the right side of the picture knows what I’m talking about.

I’m not sure which one Diane is, but I really have to weep for the people in this Virginia area of that girl is the type of lady who’s always out “dancing”. I wouldn’t “dance with her” with your “dancing shoes”. Unless I hadn’t “danced” in a while, I guess. “Dancing” by yourself can get boring after a couple weeks. It’s always the same “dance moves”. And then you towel yourself down and kind of sadly “dance” again because you feel lonely and, for that brief moment when you’re “dancing”, you feel something. Yeah. Dancing ain’t easy.

  • Lisa
    December 12, 2008
    #1

    Um, sorry but wherever this came from it’s fake. In fact, that church has worship bands, singing, dancing, and all manner of charismatic stuff.

  • Chris
    December 12, 2008
    #2

    Sounds like you’ve been brainwashed by The Church of Diane, Lisa.

  • Ontario Emperor
    December 13, 2008
    #3

    Actually, the REAL Thomas Road Baptist Church has a motorcycle ministry. So I expect they could tolerate some foot-shuffling.

  • Sam
    December 15, 2008
    #4

    A fake that you wouldn’t have fallen in for if you had done 2 seconds of research on this article. Many US churches probably are like this but this doesn’t seem as funny as a fake as it would be if it was real.

  • Chris
    December 15, 2008
    #5

    I still think it’s funny. And much like your mother when discussing your sexuality, I prefer to live in denial, Sam.

  • sjsmith3
    December 15, 2008
    #6

    Thomas Road dances on stage every Christmas. A little checking on your part would show that this is a hoax and a lie. Jerry Falwell has been dead for 19 months. There is no “free pamphlet.” Whoever wrote this is NOT representing Thomas Road Baptist Church. Check your facts, please!

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