From a hotel in Miami…
For all that I’ve trashed Audrina Patridge and Leelee Sobieski over the past week for not showing any skin in a completely dull winter season, it’s only fair that I go out of my way to applaud Kim Kardashian for finding her way into a bikini when no one else is brave enough to. Rain, sleet, or snow, Kim Kardashian will find a way to wedge her big fat ass into something slinky so that people will take pictures of her. I’ve said some less-than-nice things about her before, including saying that having sex with her would be like f’ing a couch, but occasionally you need to salute people in spite of the fact that you could do a suitable yodel into their vagina or if you could fill it up with water and have birds land in it and splash around. Doesn’t make her a bad person. It just means that a child will escape her loins like it was on a slip and slide.
But yeah, thanks Kim. You know what’s most important and I thank you for that.
Disgusting vintage foods 
Annoying Things Women Do 
Are you a douchebag? 
What women are afraid of 
Sexy Female Athletes 
December 17, 2008
#1
If you ever get a girlfriend and she says “talk dirty to me”… oboyoboy would I like to be a fly on the…(you fill in the blank)
Slip and slide… image worm.
December 17, 2008
#2
GLS, this is probably a bit TMI, but I’m not a big dirty talk guy. My girlfriend kind of veers into it sometimes and I give it back, but I kind of feel silly doing it. Like I kind of want to laugh sometimes. Which probably wouldn’t be the best thing for our relationship.
So I guess the point is that no, my vivid descriptions of the female anatomy do not extend to the boudoir. The more you know.
December 17, 2008
#3
What? No ass pictures?
December 17, 2008
#4
Hey I can’t help it that she wouldn’t remove the wrap from that big ass of hers. My guess is she’s a little out of shape and doesn’t want people mocking her cellulite.
April 8, 2009
#5
still looks good though