Al-Zaidi offered contract

Detroit, Michigan
Dec 15 08:17 AM US/Eastern

The Lions were so impressed by the lack of accuracy and velocity by Muntazer al-Zaidi aka “The Shoe Thrower” that team officials have offered him a contract.

It seems a bit odd considering the bad publicity the team will get but interim Lions GM Martin Mayhew says it’s not a worry.

We are about to go 0-16 so we might as well pile it on with the bad PR

When asked later when Al-Zaidi would be available to practice, Mayhew went onto say

The Secret Service is probably working him over something good right now. Wouldn’t be surprised if the man had an anal probe inserted at some time. Then again, it can’t be any worse than what our quarterbacks have had done to them on Sundays the past couple of seasons. Concussions, broken bones, anal probes, its all the same in the grand scheme of things.

Lions owner William Clay Ford could not be reach for comment.