People doing assholeish things to innocent bystanders has long been a favorite pasttime of mine and this video is no exception. Check out “Urban Sprinting”, part of British comedian Neg Dupree’s “Neg’s Urban Sports” series.

While Neg is certainly athletic in how he escaped from the fit mall cops, my favorite part was how he really tortured that poor fat cop. That’s how fat people in our society should be treated, just abused repeatedly until they roll on their sides and beach themselves. Those random athletic fat guys can be exempted though because they’re kind of awesome. When they move, it’s hypnotic how everything wiggles and jiggles while moving relatively gracefully, like a beautiful dance between man and diabetes.

View the rest of Neg’s Urban Sports here. My other favorite is the Burger Bowl, in which Neg chucks burgers and other fast food at people on the street. The only way that could be any better is if he spat in the face of a starving African child after each toss.