Via PHD Comics comes this look at the differences between the science on our favorite TV shows and how it is in real life.

It’s true, TV is really deceptive. For example did you know that there isn’t actually an underwater community with a sponge and some fat sea mollusk and a squirrel in an astronaut suit? More liberal media spin from Nickelodeon.

Really though, if you can’t accept that TV takes some jumps in logic, you can probably just die. If TV were real life, Jack Bauer would spend countless hours on 24 filling out paperwork and dealing with explosive diarrhea from the toxins he was exposed to. But weeks of a show with a guy filing reports and asking for softer toilet paper for his sensitive asshole isn’t the most compelling thing on TV. More compelling than The No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency, sure. But watching Jill Scott’s fat ass bathing in butter while she does a sexy hippo dance for you would be more compelling than that “Hey, we’ve got black people that aren’t criminals on HBO! Love us!” drivel.