Snakes on a Plane's TV edit is interesting

I wanted to post it yesterday but with so much compelling timely content (squirrels sucking each other’s balls?!?!? Can’t hold that one!), didn’t get around to it. Here’s an edit of Samuel L. Jackson’s Snakes on a Plane when airing on FX.

That is so true. I hate snakes like crazy but snakes that FIGHT MONKEYS? What assholes. How could you possibly fight a monkey? They’re so cute when they’re not ripping the face off of a woman in Connecticut while stoned off of wine and pills.

I saw Snakes on a Plane and I can tell you that the only way a TV edit would help the movie is by editing out pretty much all the awfulness in the movie. Which means that the movie would be about three minutes long consisting of the topless scene and a scene where Samuel L. Jackson punches a snake in the face. There are more entertaining bouts with diarrhea than this movie. At least with that, there’s a chance you won’t know what’s coming.

Chris
April 21, 2009
#1

Sam L’s career has really taken a nose dive.. I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say The Negotiator was the last decent movie he made.. Don’t believe me? Check out his IMDB page and tell me there’s another movie he’s done since 1998 that is worth more than a means to wipe the turds from my butt.. Star Wars? The Man? Next thing you know, he’ll be doing crappy kid action movies like Danny Trejo does now… What a sad world…
Chris
April 21, 2009
#2

The thing with his movies is I always desperately want to believe they’ll be good, like Changing Lanes and Lakeview Terrace. Only decent movies since 1998, I’d say are Black Snake Moan (decent) and Unbreakable (very good). Which is more than I thought but, yeah, not exactly setting my loins ablaze.
Absent
April 27, 2009
#3

Not as good as the UK TV edit of “Repo Man”. Every instance of “mother fucker” was replaced with “melon farmer”.