Cop in trouble for giving Pop-Tarts to gorillas

Cops are supposed to be authority figures to keep you lawless savages in control. But sometimes, even they have lapses in judgment. For example, giving a delicious toaster pastry to a large monkey. A mistake we’ve all made at one time or another, I’m sure.

poptart

A St. Paul police officer is under investigation after entering Como Zoo, after hours, to feed gorillas a snack.

Surveillance video captured the incident last January, around 2 a.m., when two zoo security guards snuck four to eight people into the zoo. Among the unauthorized visitors, was an off-duty St. Paul Cop.

The Como Zoo isn’t sure if the gorillas actually ate the Pop-Tarts or not. Regardless, the gorillas appear to be doing just fine.

The three gorillas are named Schroeder, Gordy and Togo.

Thank God the article told me what the gorillas were named. If one of them were named Earl or something, I’d probably be completely indifferent. But Togo? You don’t pull this kind of crap with Togo, Mr. Policeman. Never Togo.

Plus everyone knows that Pop-Tarts are PART of a complete breakfast. The officer should have gave the gorillas some eggs and orange juice to go along with it. If we’re going to give monkeys human food, we should at least be responsible about it.

[via]

Chris Spags Chris is a comic and the founding editor of Guyism.com. He previously ran Blog of Hilarity and has contributed to numerous other prominent outlets. Known for his biting wit and nose for interesting items, there is no doubt that Chris smells better than any other writer that you can find.

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4 comments
  1. Lise says:

    You’re dumb.

  2. Lise says:

    You’re dumb. And you’re censoring me. Thumbs up!

  3. Chris says:

    Every comment from a new IP address is held for approval due to spammers. Also you’re a cunt and I hope you and your whole family die of heart herpes.

  4. Cop in trouble for giving Pop-Tarts to gorillas http://tinyurl.com/l55tfw haha

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