Guyism

Hitler may not be dead. For real

More from Chris Spags

I think we can agree that Adolf Hitler was kind of a meanie (sorry for such harsh language). Well, bad news…you know how we all thought he committed suicide in his bunker? Yeah, might not be true. The skull they found was DNA tested and, spoiler alert, it wasn’t Hitler.

baby-hitler

ADOLF Hitler may not have died in a bunker after fresh research suggests the skull thought to be the tyrant’s was from a woman.

US archaeologist Nick Bellantoni found fragments from the skull believed to be Hitler’s were too thin to be from a male, and suspected it was the remains of a much younger woman, The Sun reports.

“The bone seemed very thin – male bone tends to be more robust. It corresponds to a woman between the ages of 20 and 40,” Dr Bellantoni said.

DNA tests performed in a US laboratory confirmed the remains could not have belonged to the Nazi leader.

The discovery casts doubt on the exact circumstances of Hitler’s death and could force history books to be rewritten.

Looks like Inglourious Basterds may not have been such an outlandish fantasy revenge film as it initially appeared. I look forward to my future children learning about the trials and tribulations of BJ Novak in their social science classes.

In related news, happy Yom Kippur everyone! What better time is there for such news to be revealed? Maybe Mr. Bellantoni wants to also make the day even better for the Jews by telling them that Chinese food isn’t kosher, or that Woody Allen’s real name is Jack Hellerstein. You’re very cruel, sir.

[News.com.au]

  • YouRright
    September 29, 2009
    #1

    You are so right. Hitler may not be dead, just the oldest man alive clocking in at over 120 years. Seriously, get a life.

  • CeeCee
    September 30, 2009
    #2

    yeah Hitler is probably dead by now. LOL. If not then he better call the Guiness Book of World Records people. They say (scientists) that he may have not shot himself, that he had his double killed while he took off and that the sucide story was for propaganda. Who knows, all i know is that he was a bad man with a bad heart.

  • W. SHORT
    October 1, 2009
    #3

    I CAN BELIEVE THE DNA IS THAT OF A WOMAN BECAUSE HITLER WAS DEFINATELY A BITCH.

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