Guyism

Alaskan couple lures out neighbors to have sex in front of them

More from Chris Spags

The whole Sarah Palin thing revealed an ugly side of Alaska that put them somewhere between inbred and the previous eskimo stereotype. Well, just to cement that perception, I bring you the story of a couple in Juneau who broke the window of their neighbors, then had sex in front of them and their 9 year-old child.

slutty-sexy-eskimo

A Neosho couple accused of performing a public sex act to irk their neighbors has been charged.

Mark Albert, 33, and Kimberly Ferguson, 43, were charged in Dodge County Circuit Court last week with misdemeanor lewd and lascivious behavior. If convicted, each could face up to nine months in jail.

Police were called to the couple’s Milwaukee Street home around 7:10 p.m. on Aug. 23 after a neighbor reported that Ferguson and Albert engaged in a sex act while standing on the porch. The act took place in full view of the neighbor and five witnesses, including a 9-year-old child, according to the criminal complaint.

The complainant told police that the couple had thrown an object through her window, and while she was out repairing it, Albert and Ferguson came outside and began taunting them before performing the sex act, according to the complaint.

I have to wonder what sexual act you could be doing that would allow the both of you to taunt your neighbors effectively. Not for nothing ladies, but if you’re taking it like a dog and giving your neighbors the “Nyeah nyeah nyeah nyeah nyeah” face, you’re going to be the one who looks silly, not them.

What kind of person do you have to be though for this to be your revenge? Egging the house, slashing a tire, even something completely sociopathic like stabbing them…that’s a revenge. Having sex in front of your neighbors to “get them back” just seems silly. I’d probably just watch and go, “You sure showed me.” Then slowly start tugging inside my front pocket and as they get weirded out say, “NO. YOU CONTINUE EXTRACTING REVENGE. Ungggggghhhh.” I’d say I learned a real lesson there. They showed me what’s what.

[FDL Reporter]

  • Laura
    December 29, 2009
    #1

    Uhh, that's not Alaska. Alaska doesn't have counties. Looks like Dodge County is in Wisconsin. Google is your friend!

  • Laura
    December 29, 2009
    #2

    Uhh, that's not Alaska. Alaska doesn't have counties. Looks like Dodge County is in Wisconsin. Google is your friend!

Leave a Reply:




tip your editors at editorsATguyismDOTcom
12345
Polls

What are you doing for Valentine's Day?

View Results