8 ridiculously awesome celebrity endorsements

We love our action stars and sports heroes so it’s only a natural for marketing gurus to assume we’ll love anything they tell us to buy. It’s an easy way for the celeb to make a quick buck and sometimes it’s actually a decent product. More often than not though, it comes off as strange and laughable which can be endearing it its own way. Here’s eight awesome guy’s doing their best, for better or worse to move the goods.

8 Mr. T – FlavorWave Oven
Take down the evil powers with a secret crack commando unit, keep kids off of drugs AND moves merchandise — damn, is there anything Mr. T can’t do?! What the man can do and does to hilarious effect, is inform America about the amazing ability of the FlavorWave Oven to create delicious and nutritious meals for the entire family. From his entrance to his Stepford wife lookalike co-host, this infomercial has got to be of one Mr. T’s funniest moments in front of the camera.

7 Fred and Barney – Winston Cigarettes
Way back before the general population caught on to big tobacco’s plan to dish smokes out to everybody with a set of lungs, it wasn’t that uncommon for cartoon characters to enjoy a light. And what better way to reach the everyman than America’s favorite caveman, Fred Flintstone? Poor Fred, always having to sneak out for Water Buffalo meetings and bowling tournaments, the guy can’t even work up a little lung cancer without Wilma breathing down his neck. I’m sure back in the day nothing hit the spot like a tasty Winston while enjoying Fred’s antics with the whole family, but today it just seems odd.

6 Hulk Hogan – Hulk Hogan’s Ultimate Grill
There are a few things Hulk Hogan didn’t succeed at: producing non-retarded offspring, bowing out of the ring with dignity, an illustrious movie career, etc. Fortunately for us, Hulk decided to make the natural transition after wrestling and horrible reality TV shows and come out with an electric grill. It’s 50% George Foreman Grill, 50% waffle iron and 100% cheap crap. And if you’re like Hulk and have a full schedule of suing family members and buying bandannas, you don’t have 45 seconds to make a grilled cheese sandwich. Luckily, for you, his Ultimate Grill does it in 30 seconds.

5 Steve Nash – Vitamin Water
If you didn’t already love Steve Nash for his skills on the court, you’ve gotta give props to the guy for having a good sense of humor in his endorsement of Vitamin Water. I don’t care if Mr. Nash thinks Vitamin Water taste like the sweat off Rosie O’Donnell’s ass, his parody endorsement is comedy gold. Nash gotta get them dolla dolla bills!

4 Donald Trump – Trump Steaks
If someone wanted a good porter house or filet mignon most people would probably ask the local butcher or jump in the car and go to Outback. Those people are suckers. True steak lovers know that the best way to get a good steak is from Donald Trump at Sharper Image. Donald Trump’s steaks come from cattle that were raised with a private chauffeur, went to the best prep schools and had a stock portfolio other cattle could only dream of — that’s why only 1% make the “cut”, hey-oh! Thanks to Donald and Sharper Image we can now get top quality Angus beef and an electric back massager in the same place.

3 Chuck Norris – Total Gym
I doubt Chuck Norris even needs a Total Gym, I once heard a rumor that immediately after being born he’d already been declared strongest man in the history of the world. Chuck Norris jokes aside; his commercial for the Total Gym seemed to dominate commercial breaks in the late 90s and early 00s. I can’t blame Chuck for taking the deal, an actual product that millions of men probably bought (and never used) and he got to spend some serious screen time watching Christie Brinkley work her glutes. Win-win.

2 Macho Man Randy Savage – Slim Jim
Slim Jim was a decent snack before Macho Man threw his neon colored sunglasses in the ring, but once he did every 10 year-old boy craved it that much more. Where Hulk Hogan and Mr. T come off as somewhat unbelievable in their enthusiasm for their respected endorsements, Macho Man is the real deal. I think he actually believed he had the power to create explosions and sonic booms merely by snapping into a Slim Jim. Next time you’re at a lame party with some boring vegan friendly appetizers, get that beefy, spicy, taste your party craves and snap into a Slim Jim like Macho Man would. Oh yeeeah!!

1 Wilford Brimley – Liberty Medical and Quaker Oatmeal
If you haven’t been enlightened about the benefits of oatmeal or receiving medical supplies to help with your adult type II diabetes, Wilford Brimley’s your man. Never mind that Wilford prefers to pronounce it “dia-beetus” he’s going to tell you about how Liberty Medical will get you your supplies at little cost, while sitting in front of a roaring fire. And you’re going to want to listen to grandpa Wilford — he’s old, a little grumpy cuz of the diabeetus and not afraid to smack you around in between checking his blood sugar and afternoon naps.

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