This Week in Celebrity Gossip: Oh, Angie…

Celebrity gossip items you may have missed this week…

>>> Photos of a nipple-taped, drugged –up Angelina Jolie have allegedly surfaced. Star magazine claims to have these photos, yet for some reason hasn’t published them yet.

>>> I guess now we know why Miranda Kerr got married. She’s frikkin’ pregnant. Thanks a lot, Orlando. Douchebag…

>>> Lindsay Lohan is getting out of jail, but rather than go directly to rehab (as she is supposed to do), she is going to get to spend some time with her family first, because, as we all know, her family is such a solid rock upon which she can lean.

>>> Chris Tucker owes $11 million in back taxes. Time for another rendition of Rush Hour!!

>>> Oliver Stone is an idiot.

>>> Jersey Shore’s Snooki explaining why she wouldn’t wear a bikini during the filming of their second season, says its because one-piece suits are more provocative. If by provocative she means keeps people from vomiting (as much) when they see on the beach, then yes, they are more provocative.

>>> This was all said before Snooki got arrested for being drunk off her ass while filming an episode of the show. Now THAT’s provocative.

>>> In other Jersey Shore news sure to make you want to stab your brain with an ice pick, the group rang the bell at the New York Stock Exchange.

>>> Kendall Jenner, the 14 year-old sister of Kim Kardashian, did a little photo shoot. A photo shoot that might be appropriate for someone maybe 10 year older than her. Yeah… Anyone else see another Kardashian sex tape looming in the 2010′s?

>>> Michael Jackson was obsessed with Nazis. Naturally.

>>> Remember a few weeks ago when Amanda Bynes said she retired from acting and I asked you to see if you even would notice. Well, you won’t get the chance because she just unretired. And once again I say, see if you notice.

>>> Tara Reid got drunk and flashed her vagina. No this is not a story from 2009. Or 2008. Or 2007. Or… never mind.

>>> Yet another Mel Gibson rant hit the streets this week. This time his target was former James Bond Timothy Dalton, the father of Oksana Grigorieva’s 12-year-old son. In the rant Mel raises the bar for the number of times one can say the word f–k in a paragraph. It’s really quite impressive.

>>> Mel Gibson didn’t just limit his craziness to voice mails though. Now there’s e-mail too!!!

>>> And finally, Ellen DeGeneres quit American Idol and I don’t care. But for those that do, it seems that Jennifer Lopez and Steven Tyler (is he out of rehab?) will be your new judges. Oh yeah, Kara DioGuardi got fired too. That’s why there’s two new judges, I guess.

I’m sorry I don’t have any sexy babe videos to post this week, but I do have the trailer for the new Seinfeld movie Serenity Now. Give it a look and have a great weekend, people.

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