This Week in Celebrity Gossip: We got one more back

Celebrity gossip items you may have missed this week…

— Blake Lively is now single. About f–kin’ time.

— Model Jessica White is also now single, but she scares me a little bit.

— Speaking of newly single babes, Christina Aguilera is having a little trouble getting the Ewok to move out their house.

— Audrina Patridge’s mom, Lynn, got drunk and went on an epic rant (ON VIDEO!!). Trust me, this is one time the word “epic” is not being used improperly.

— By now you’ve all heard about Charlie Sheen and his little “episode” with the hooker/porn star, right? Well, Capri Anderson (the hooker/porn star) now wants to meet with Colorado prosecutors to claim Charlie held her against her will and get his probation revoked. How much money you want to bet that Chuck gets off scott-free? Seriously… I will bet anyone any amount of money he cruises on this.

— David Arquette. Midget strippers. That is all.

— Reggie Bush is not happy with Kim Kardashian… over a car wash billing mistake. Seriously.

— Kendra Wilkinson turned down Playboy. No, really, she did. Though I guess once you’ve released a sex tape, what’s the point of doing Playboy? Oops. Sorry, Kim.

— Oprah Winfrey is being sued for plagiarism. It seems like a possible frivolous lawsuit but anything that gets under the Big O’s skin is fine by me.

— Katy Perry says she’s a freak in bed. Of course she said that.

— Speaking of Playboy, they also offered the target of Mel Gibson’s “affection” Oksana Grigorieva her own spread in the magazine. Which she turned down. Damn. We could have had some bonus Mel stuff if that’d happened.

— Tila Tequila is being accused of armed kidnapping. Yeah, I thought that might bring out a chuckle or two.

— Mariah Carey is not only fat now she’s also pregnant.

— In this week’s Lindsay Lohan news, it seems LiLo is having a bit of trouble paying for her rehab. On the bright side, she was offered the money to cover it if she’d do a porno.

— I hate mentioning this because it only gives her more attention, but Taylor Momsen might be the most insufferable human being on the planet. And this is a planet with Spencer Pratt and Kristen Stewart on it.

— And finally, mirrors are still not Britney Spears’ friend.

This week’s sexy video comes to us courtesy of Virgin Unite who is raising money and awareness for fistula by showing what a typical morning on Necker Island is for Richard Branson (Hint: It involves bikinis, Alessandra Ambrosio, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Brooklyn Decker, Linsday Ellingson, Jarah Mariano, Erin Heatherton, Miranda Kerr, and Marisa Miller. Yeah…

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