November 13, 2008 11:30 am

Jessica Biel needs a real man

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Jessica Biel needs a real man… a man who is secure about looks and doesn’t mind being morbidly obese… a man who secure about his position in life and needs no job, no motivation or no ambition to back it up… a man who can handle his liquor day in and day out… if not every day… a man who is willing to go the distance to get a chick… even if that means sabotaging her drink and dragging her back to his one bedroom shack of love… JESSICA BIEL NEEDS A MAN LIKE ME.