September 21, 2010 3:30 pm

Lindsay Lohan didn’t think cocaine would show up on her drug tests

Follow @douchelarue More from Shawn Norris >

Lindsay Lohan is apparently heading back to jail because she didn’t think that cocaine would show up on her court appointed drug tests. Time to fire that life coach, Lindsay.

Now this story is vague at best, as it seems a source close to Lindsay (Captain Morgan?) says that the starlet didn’t take her drug rehabilitation seriously and wasn’t aware of the subtle nuances of drug testing in today’s court system. Things like the fact that they would actually check it or that something such as cocaine would show up on her drug test.

“She lives in this fantasy land, where she thinks, ‘A line of coke won’t show up in my system.’ Lindsay could control herself, but doesn’t,” said a source

That seems beyond naïve; it’s just downright embarrassing. I know that there are a lot of delusional people in Hollywood, but no one could be that delusional, right? I mean even Paris Hilton had the foresight to try and get rid of her stash right before it fell directly into a police officer’s hand. You’ve been arrested for two drug and alcohol related issues before and you have to figure that after the 100th time you’ve probably urinated into a cup that somebody is checking this stuff out.

lindsay drunk Lindsay Lohan didn’t think cocaine would show up on her drug tests

“Oh, I hate it because when I do cocaine it makes me sweat and thirsty, so I have to take a few shots of tequila, then the sweat and booze just set my SCRAM bracelet off…”

Or maybe she’s just drinking like our good friend Ty Webb…