August 30, 2010 11:37 am

Lindsay Lohan’s dad set to open his own rehab center

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Radar Online is reporting that Michael Lohan is moving to California so he can open a rehab center that is being funded by “a really well known person.” Obviously Michael is finally serious about being closer to his family…

Can we just go ahead and throw both of the Lohan parents in jail for being scum sucking, fame whores that couldn’t raise a normal child if they moved to Iowa with Dr. Phil? Joan Crawford was a better parent than these two. So I’m sure that Lohan will be an absolute gem of rehab director since he’s been arrested for insider trading, assault, driving while under the influence and only really seems interested in helping himself get on the cover of any gossip rags and chasing down the paparazzi so they’ll take his picture.

lindsay michael Lindsay Lohan’s dad set to open his own rehab center

“Yes, it’s, true, I’ll be running it,” Lohan told us in an exclusive interview. “I think it’s time that Dina and I both step out of the media for a while, and for me that means getting back to what I know best — helping people with addiction.”

Yeah, you and Dina always step out of the spotlight like you were the Lindbergh baby. And how is it that what you know best is “helping people with addiction” and somehow your daughter has been to rehab four different times in the last few years? That’s the worst endorsement for a rehabilitation clinic that I’ve ever heard. I ‘d feel more comfortable going to a Paris Hilton rehab center than anything with “Lohan” tacked on the back of it.

“I’m going to have a protocol that will be have to be followed. I don’t believe in prescription drugs,” he said. “If people come in on them they’re going to have to get off of them, otherwise they’ll be looking for another rehab.”

Turning people away is the first step to recovery. Seeing as this guy should be helping or already should have fixed his daughter if he’s so spectacular at helping people beat their addiction, it’s hard to see this business taking off. And since he can’t seem to beat his addiction to talking to the press, it’s hard to see him being able to help really help anyone do anything significant. Maybe his time would be best spent being a father and a role model so the same thing that happened to Lindsay doesn’t happen to his other kids.

Nah, how would he get on TMZ by doing that?

Michael Lohan To Open Rehab Center, ‘God Will Be A Major Element’ [Radar]