Twitter Crazy: This week’s best celebrity tweets

Twitter Crazy: This week’s best celebrity tweets
eldh, Flickr
Every week celebrities go on Twitter and speak their minds. Sometimes they're funny, sometimes they're thought-provoking, and sometimes we don't know what they're talking about. This list is all of that and more. Strap in. It could get bumpy.

Photo credit: eldh, Flickr -Douglas Charles

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What’s the right age to tell your kids Santa Claus isn’t real and clowns are murderers?
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) December 17, 2012

I believe it's 32.

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We should all pitch in and buy a huge humidifier for the planet.It’s dry up in here.
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) December 17, 2012

I'll chip in 10 bucks.

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<-- never gets laid...&the 2nd I do? I find out my birth control is almost out&need new prescription #irony #protectagainstnothing !
— Adrianne Curry (@AdrianneCurry) December 17, 2012

I'll chip in 10 bucks and help with the other part.

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O that 2 mins after a movie ends when I'm secretly pretending I livein that time/place/genre
— Sarah Silverman (@SarahKSilverman) December 18, 2012

Been there, done that.

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Trying to think of a gentle way to break it to the radio that I may not love The Foo Fighters as much as it believes.
— erinn hayes (@hayeslady) December 18, 2012

Funny, my radio thinks I love Katy Perry.

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Only 7 more shopping days until I give my family cash for Christmas.
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) December 18, 2012

Cash really is the best way to say how much you care.

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In light of Newtown, our country has to pull together.
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 18, 2012

'Deep Thoughts' from The Donald.

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Kanye make the good music but his girlfriend look like racoon in her ass
— The Iron Sheik (@the_ironsheik) December 18, 2012

Best description of Kim Kardashian all week.

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Shopping for a Xmas gift for my mom and the sales lady keeps suggesting I get her a pearl necklace. I may explode from holding in laughter.
— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) December 18, 2012

Why? Moms like pearl necklaces.

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Who do I write to at Instagram to buy all those photos of my friend Geoff?
— Tim Siedell (@badbanana) December 18, 2012

Be careful. He might boycott Instagram so you can't.

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Today's NY football headlines: 1) Mark Sanchez receives death threats; 2) Victor Cruz visits family of Newtown victim. Perspective.
— Bonnie Bernstein (@BonnieBernstein) December 19, 2012

Seems about right.

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Whatever company is marketing Linsday Lohan's Bar Mitzvah, Wedding and "appearances" FYI, if she's not available, I'm free for all that!
— Colin Quinn (@iamcolinquinn) December 19, 2012

How awesome would it be to have Lindsay Lohan at your wedding?

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Currently enjoying our annual "YOU fucking address the Christmas cards" argument with my wife.
— Michael Ian Black (@michaelianblack) December 19, 2012

I love holiday traditions.

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I just watch the porn for the story development
— Kayden Kross (@Kayden_Kross) December 19, 2012

Who doesn't?

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I make my real life friends send me friend requests by mail.
— RainnWilson (@rainnwilson) December 19, 2012

Not a bad policy.

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Just a thought if you cooked at home on the 1st date you've actually skipped 3 bases putting yourself in scoring position strategically...
— Chad Johnson (@ochocinco) December 19, 2012

And he's scored a lot.

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Planning a dinner for end-of-world Friday. I think I'll serve wine from 2000 & from other end-of-world years that have passed
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) December 19, 2012

That's going to be a lot to eat and drink.

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It would REALLY suck if the world actually did end on Friday.
— Ariana Grande (@ArianaGrande) December 19, 2012

Yes, that would suck.

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CNN: Thousands of Mayan students expected to skip their homework tonight.
— Joshua Malina (@JoshMalina) December 20, 2012

Oooh, they're going to be in trouble now.

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"Miss Universe? Puhleeze. Maybe Miss EARTH!" says Miss Neptune as she tosses aside the morning paper and calls her publicist.
— Mo Rocca (@MoRocca) December 20, 2012

Hey, if the NBA can call their winners at year-end the World Champions...

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Santa is immortal right? Cuz we don't talk about that aspect enough.
— Jen Kirkman (@JenKirkman) December 20, 2012

Never really thought about that until now.

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MAYAN APOCALYPSE**Card Subject to Change**
— Gregory Shane Helms (@ShaneHelmsCom) December 20, 2012

Damn, and we paid good money for the tickets to see it.

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When Santa dies, I'm going to tell everyone how he touched me and that the BBC knew.
— Ricky Gervais (@rickygervais) December 20, 2012

Sorry, we've already established that he's immortal.

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Funny... I don't FEEL like I died in a fiery apocalypse... maybe I'm doing it wrong.
— Eric Arceneaux (@EricArceneaux) December 21, 2012

Yes, this was quite a letdown.

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There are going to be a lot of Mayans saying "Just kidding" today.
— Ben Schwartz (@rejectedjokes) December 21, 2012

Good one.

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