September 3, 2010 10:46 am

VIDEO: Jerry Lewis would punch Lindsay Lohan in the mouth

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The 84-year-old Nutty Professor is not too thrilled at the state of American’s celebrity driven culture these days and is none too pleased with Lindsay Lohan in particular. The comedian told Inside Edition that if he had the chance he’d smack her right in the mouth. Somewhere French people are drinking wine and applauding.

This is quite a bold statement by the comedian — even for someone who is sometimes known to be quite crude and vicious in interviews.

And now for my crass statement: I would pay to see Jerry Lewis fight Lindsay Lohan. It would probably be the only thing I’d pay to see either one of them in, but this has “summer blockbuster” written all over it.

You know he does have a point though. While the statement is wild, the sentiment is real — these celebutantes get away with everything in Los Angeles and barley end up with a slap on the wrist for major infractions. They get drunk, snort coke, pop pills, smoke weed and nobody seems to give a damn about their health or safety. Lohan’s parents certainly haven’t done anything to curb the girl’s addictions and are definitely in the running for “Worst Fame-Whore Parents of All-Time.” And the morons that buy the magazines that drive the fame of these women don’t actually care for their well-being, as most just want to judge and say “At least I’m not like that.” So maybe Lewis is right in a sense; maybe these women need a good spanking by the judicial system, one where they actually go to a real prison for breaking the law and don’t get all the special treatment some of them feel they’ve earned by being mostly talentless and doing absolutely nothing of consequence.

“I think they need a f*****g spanking! And a reprimand!” he said. “It has nothing to do with [money and fame], it has to do that they have the intelligence of a box of rocks. A bag of snails will give you better answers than those people. I think a great deal of it is ignorance and crying for something other than love.”

Or maybe the other people with snail brains could just stop buying the magazines that drive the fame machine. But who would make us OMG! and feel better about ourselves then? One of these days Alice, straight to the moon…