Michael Bay’s ‘Ninja Turtles’ is in trouble

K. Thor Jensen Contributing Writer, Entertainment

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Rubenstein, Flickr

There might be a God after all. The preliminary reports from Paramount about Michael Bay’s reboot of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise were really, really scary. The Hollywood turdmonger responsible for ruining beloved franchises like Transformers was planning on changing the origins of the crime-fighting terrapins, making them aliens from another world, and fans were about as happy about that as you’d think.

Now Paramount, who are already seeing a lot of problems this summer with the pushback of G.I. Joe: Retaliation and World War Z, are taking yet another project and putting it on the backburner. Pre-production for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was scheduled to start this month in Vancouver, but The Hollywood Reporter is saying that the film, which was supposed to be released in December of 2013, has been pushed to at least May of 2014 and possibly later.

The problem, again, is the script, say outsiders. Guess what, Hollywood? If you can’t come up with a good story, all of the 3D and explosions in the world aren’t going to save your movie. People can get that at home playing video games for way cheaper. Maybe, I dunno, hire a writer or something? Just a thought.

Photo credit: Rubenstein, Flickr