Top 10 upcoming Guitar Hero special editions

Posted by Douglas Charles on April 16th, 2009 at 6:30 am

10) Radiohead, where none of the controls work, instructions are in free verse gibberish and the unlock audio track is from indie rock critics telling you how great the game is. If you complete the game, you unlock a video in which the band stares at the floor and says nothing.

9) Amy Winehouse, where players drink, smoke, inject and swallow in time with the music

8) KISS, assuming that Activision can somehow convince Gene Simmons and the boys to pursue something so crass and exploitative as a merchandise tie-in

7) Killers, which is actually a two-part release, so that everyone can bitch about how much better the first one was

6) Velvet Underground, only released to 40 consumers, all of whom will start video game companies of their own

5) Smash Mouth, because that song just never ever gets old

4) Kanye West, with over 60 percent of the game’s content dedicated to disparaging other special editions

3) Tom Waits, with all black and white graphics and complimentary bourbon

2) Guns N Roses, scheduled for release in 2019

1) U2, with proceeds going to save Darfur, the whales, or some other crap

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Douglas Charles Douglas Charles, aka "DC Scrap," is the managing editor of Guyism.com. His experience includes operating an assortment sports and entertainment Web sites over the past decade, but his specialty is discovering sexy women from all over the world that he knows he will never have a chance with, let alone meet - a quality he shares with 99.99% of his readers.