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Chilly on the plane? Bring a sweater, or $8 for a blanket-and-pillow pack, if you’re on a domestic American Airlines flight.

On May 1, the carrier will begin charging for a pillow and blanket set on all domestic flights, as well as those to or from Canada, Mexico, Hawaii, the Caribbean and Central America, according to American Airlines spokesman Tim Smith.

The $8 charge buys a blue fleece blanket and an inflatable neck pillow that fliers can use in flight and keep for future use.

“American evaluates all aspects of the business to ensure that economic decisions are prudent and strategic for the long-term success of the company,” Smith said in an e-mail announcing the decision.

Will there be an increase in quality of the products? Probably not, unless not getting some previous flyer’s skin flakes and body fluid is worth eight bucks to you.

So, first, meals were taken away (boo). Then they started charging some overweight people for two seats (meh). Then they started charging for luggage (double boo). Then some airlines added Internet (yay) though most airliners are charging reasonable to obscene amounts for it (boo). You may think, “Well, I never liked the pillow or blanket anyway so, whatever, there’s nothing left to charge me for.” And you would be correct. Up until Continental decides that you should pay for the privilege of having seats. Really, we’re just getting closer and closer to having our air travel conducted roughly like a slave ship for the same prices. Personally, I’d pay the extra $20 to not be tight packed.

American Airlines to stop offering free blankets on domestic flights [CNN]

Other than the fact that Bar Refaeli is back letting Leo DiCaprio touch her in odd places I can’t really find any flaws in her, so I am really happy she is making another appearance in the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue. SUPER BONUS VIDEO included below. I’ll stop typing now since you quit reading anyway…

Considering the ball slips out of hand, Morningstar actually makes quite a recovery to even get the shot off.

Then again, nobody is guarding him so I’m not really sure if we should be all that impressed. And while this might be bad, I once witnessed, in person, Ben Wallace airball 2 free throws in a row.

They talk about Wilt’s 100 points as if its the most unbreakable record in sports but I can tell you that Ben Wallace’s feat will almost never be duplicated.

A Russian man is half the weight he used to be after surgeons sliced 267 pounds of fat from his body.

Petr Ferivov of Voronezh, who now weighs 244 pounds, says he was so fat at 511 pounds he could no longer sleep on his back, could barely walk and had abandoned any hope of a sex life, the Austrian Times reports.

The 45-year-old “man mountain” was so overweight he underwent four hours of surgery to have much of the excess fat removed from his abdomen.

Ferivov plans on going on a strict diet to get down to his ideal weight of 182 pounds.

Good for this guy to try to do something to get his weight under control. But at the same time, deciding to go on a strict diet to lose 60 pounds after getting almost 270 lanced off of you like a boil seems kind of silly. It’s like saying you want to compete in a marathon, only to ask a fellow competitor to give you a piggyback ride until the last two miles.

Anyway, that’s a picture of a pound of human flesh and a pound of fat above. If that’s not going to get you to go Karen Carpenter your ass off in the bathroom today, I don’t know what is.

Surgeons slice 267 lbs of fat off obese man [APP]

For the second year in a row there was some event called The Big Game Give which I assume is a charity function surrounding the Super Bowl (I’m intuitive like that). All I know is that AnnaLynne McCord and Joanna Krupa were there and made it one sexy charity function. Good gravy, Joanna’s pants look like they were painted on. This has inspired me to start a charity. I mean, if you can get babes like these to attend your parties just because it’s a charity, why wouldn’t you? I’m all about helping people.

Mr Rabeder, 47, a businessman from Telfs is in the process of selling his luxury 3,455 sq ft villa with lake, sauna and spectacular mountain views over the Alps, valued at £1.4 million.

Also for sale is his beautiful old stone farmhouse in Provence with its 17 hectares overlooking the arrière-pays, on the market for £613,000. Already gone is his collection of six gliders valued at £350,000, and a luxury Audi A8, worth around £44,000.

Mr Rabeder has also sold the interior furnishings and accessories business – from vases to artificial flowers – that made his fortune.

“My idea is to have nothing left. Absolutely nothing,” he told The Daily Telegraph. “Money is counterproductive – it prevents happiness to come.”

Millionaire gives away fortune which made him miserable [Daily Telegraph]

With all due respect to my former #1 WAG Cheryl Tweedy, when was the last time you posed in body paint, baby? Thanks to the geniuses at Sports Illustrated we have a new #1 WAG in Abigail Clancy. Long may she reign. All Cheryl has to do to regain her title is equal Abbey’s amazing feat here and slap some body paint on herself. I’m not asking her to do more than Abbey. Just to keep up. That’s fair I think.

Authorities said a man accused of stealing a car then reporting it stolen remains in custody after telling police he was robbed at gunpoint while trying to buy crack cocaine with a credit card. The Flint Journal said the man reported Thursday night that a 2003 Chevy Malibu had been stolen.

Police reports indicated the vehicle was previously stolen out of Lapeer, about 50 miles north-northwest of Detroit.

The suspect is being lodged at the Genesee County Jail.

You know, this just isn’t fair for the poor guy trying to buy the crack. For years, we’ve been beaten over the head with the concept that Visa is “everywhere [we] want to be,” but nowhere did a Visa commercial say “Visa is everywhere you want to be…except neighborhoods selling crack.” Granted, that’d be a very narrow delimiting factor of the power of the Visa card, but at least then consumers are aware that if they’re going to get high, they need to look elsewhere. Great opportunity for the Discover card though. The “hookers and drugs” crowd have financial needs too, you know.

Police: Man tries to buy crack with credit card [Denver Post]

But coaches fighting in a 4-6 year old kids’ league? In the words of tennis great John McEnroe, “you can’t be serious.”

It happened in Allen Park, MI a suburb of Detroit. The coach of the Mini Mite Huskies (no, I didn’t make that up) accused the other team of double-shifting players at the end of the game.

You read that correctly by the way, this is a 4-6 year old league. I don’t even think the kids understand what double-shifting is. Getting off the bench and not falling flat on their face is their #1 goal every shift.

As the coaches met at mid-ice after the game, fists started flying and sadly, kids started crying.

Regretfully, there is no video of the incident but there is however, an eyewitness account from the Zamboni man. In my book, that’s just as good.

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Rather than spending Valentine’s Day with their partner, one-fifth of adults would prefer to be with their pet, although the French still came top for romance, according to a joint global poll by Reuters/Ipsos.

The survey of 24,000 people in 23 countries found 21 percent of adults would rather spend February 14 with their pet than their spouse, although the French were least likely to choose a furry friend over a human with only 10 percent taking that option.

But the survey found that age and income were more of a determining factor than nationality when it came to romance, with younger, less affluent people more likely to choose their pet as their Valentine’s Day companion.

John Wright, senior vice president of Ipsos, said 25 percent of people aged under 35 opted for their pet over their partner compared to 18 percent of those aged 35-54 and 14 percent of people aged 55 plus.

Men and women were evenly split over the question.

Then again, maybe it does make some sense, especially if you’re a man. What do guys get out of Valentine’s Day, really? I feel like you end up spending it with some girl you don’t really have any romantic feelings with just because you’re “supposed to” or you end up falling way short of what your delusional girlfriend expects of Valentine’s Day thanks to stupid movies and TV. But with a dog, you just scratch him behind the ear, play a video game, perhaps pleasure yourself while he stares at you with his head tilted to the side…typically only 33% of these options occur with a girlfriend.

Fifth of adults choose pet over partner on V’Day [Yahoo]

Unveiled on The Late Show with David Letterman, here is Brooklyn Decker on the cover of the 2010 Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition.

As a kid, this was a holiday for me. I would secretly run to the store across the street from me while telling my mom I was at a friends. For some reason, my mom believed looking at girls in bikinis was like looking at porn. This was well before the internet era of 2 girls 1 cup, Girls Gone Wild, and Bangbus.

(Needless to say, she didn’t know about my porn collection underneath the bed)

I still have them all saved today, although, some are probably not considered sanitary for reasons beyond my control.

Anyways, back to Brooklyn Decker, we’re big fans of her here at Guyism. And apparently, so are those koalas who found her so sexually stimulating, they began to have wild sex on Australian Tv.

Here’s a video from SIs page to hold you over until you get your subscription

Since I have never seen the TV show Fringe I had no idea who Anna Torv was or why she was posing topless for this month’s Esquire magazine. Now that I know who she is I may have to watch that show once or twice. I must say I enjoying this influx of sexy Australian babes into our culture. Between Anna, Miranda, Sophie, and Sophie there’s a lot of

Way back in 2001, Homer Simpson’s most popular catchphrase – Doh! – successfully transcended beyond the status of pop culture catchphrase and entered the pantheon of legitimate English word. This momentous occasion was the direct result of the Oxford English Dictionary deciding to include the word in their 2001 edition.

However, doh is just one of many Simpsons neologisms (fake words) that have entered into both American and British mainstream vocabulary. Looking back over the years, one could argue that a number of these fake words also deserve the prestige of sitting alongside “doh” as a proper term in the American lexicon. And if any of those eggheads at Oxford are reading this article, I would like to suggest the following ten words for inclusion in their next dictionary edition:

1 Yoink

Yoink: An exclamation that, when uttered in conjunction with taking an object, immediately transfers ownership from the original owner to the person using the word regardless of previous property rights. (urbandictionary.com)

Yoink is a word that makes stealing even more fun. While this phrase first appeared in a 1960s episode of The Flinstones, The Simpsons did much to bring it into popular use. In the town of Springfield, the phrase is first uttered by Homer in a fourth season episode as he snatches a wad of cash out of Marge’s hands. The word has also been used by Snake while purse-snatching, Mr. Burns while swiping a $1,000 bill from Bart and an anonymous person stealing Lenny’s diamond tooth.

2 Diddly

Diddly: a filled pause, a non-word which a speaker uses to take up time or space in a sentence, and which are sometimes used for emphasis (http://www.exampleproblems.com/wiki/index.php/List_of_neologisms_on_The_Simpsons)

If “uh” and “um” have a home in the dictionary, then so too does Ned’s favorite non-word. Whether used to add alliteration, replace a swear word or simply as nonsense, few words are as versatile and effective as diddly. One of my favorite diddly quotes: “Son of a diddly!”

3 Glayvin

Glayvin: a nonsensical word used to describe any emotion from surprise to joy to sadness (urbandictionary.com)

Great glayvin in a bag, is this a good word. Glayvin is yet another catchphrase that has earned a considerable amount of steam in the real world. Professor Frink’s most popular utterance is a catch-all term that can be used in almost as many scenarios as “diddly.” The term likely originates form Jerry Lewis’ legendary catchphrase “froyndleyven.” Frink’s character traits are clearly inspired by Lewis.

4 Meh

Meh: Indifference; to be used when one simply does not care. (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=meh)

I’d wager a guess and say that “meh” is used in common conversation way more often than “doh.” The word was first muttered in tandem by both Bart and Lisa when Homer asks if they want to go to Blockoland – a Legoland rip-off amusement park. Meh has reached such popularity, that self-described “minor celebrity” John Hodgman has publicly denounced its use. I, on the other hand, find great merit in the word – and apparently so too does the Collins English Dictionary. This British publication added “meh” to their dictionary in 2008 (so stop dragging your heels, America).

5 Kwyjibo

Kwyjibo: A big, dumb, balding North American ape with no chin and a short temper.

In an early episode, Bart lays down all his tiles in a game of Scrabble to spell “kwyjibo.” The definition above comes straight from Bart’s mouth (with addendum from Marge), and is a thinly veiled description of Homer. Granted, I suppose the validity of the word suffers a bit from the fact that kwyjibos as a species don’t actually exist, which is why I implore nature biologists everywhere to force “kwyjibo” into popular acceptance by bestowing the name upon the next long-lost ape species we discover.

6 Car Hole

Car Hole: a covered place to park your car; synonym for garage

If you want to refer to your garage without sounding like a snobby Frenchman, then this is the perfect word for you. Moe Szyslak coins this phrase during a game of poker after ridiculing Homer for his fancy-shmancy usage of the word “garage.” The fact that Homer immediately discards his previous nomenclature by using the phrase “car hole” in the very next scene should be testament to the supreme accessibility and usefulness of this perfectly simple and descriptive term.

7 Frogurt

Frogurt: a portmanteau for “frozen yogurt”

Looking back, I’m surprised that The Simpsons were the first to use this term, as it seems like such a natural way to shorten “frozen yogurt” – a term I think we all can agree is way too long and clunky. The delicious word made its debut in a Treehouse of Horror episode in which Homer visits an evil gift shop. Apparently the Frogurt is cursed (that’s bad), but it also comes with a free topping (that’s good).

8 Craptacular

Craptacular: of exceptionally poor quality; spectacularly crappy

Along with frogurt, craptacular is one of the more accessible portmanteaus crafted by the writers of the Simpsons. Bart uses the word to describe Homer’s Christmas lights display during a Christmas episode. Certainly, there are plenty of instances in the real world where the term “crappy” just isn’t strong enough to effectively portray the sheer terribleness of a particular person, place or thing. For those instances, craptacular is here to help.

9 Unpossible

Unpossible: not possible; synonym of impossible

“Me fail English? That’s unpossible!” When Ralph Wiggum blurted out this silly little phrase in the sixth season of the Simpsons, it instantly became one of the most quoted lines of the series. Taken out of context, the term is generally meant ironically, which some may argue gives it less credibility. However, if you think the word is one that would only be used genuinely by uneducated morons, let me just point out that “unpossible” has been used by none other than William Shakespeare. The word appears in his play, Richard II.

10 Embiggen

Embiggen: To make bigger or grow in size; a perfectly cromulent word

This graceful word can be attributed to town founder Jebediah Springfield. As the town motto goes, “A noble spirit embiggens the smallest man.” The word is used repeatedly throughout the 7th season episode in which all of Springfield comes down with a major case of Jebeditis (another excellent candidate for this list) during the town’s bicentennial celebration. Adding credibility to the word is the fact that it has appeared in numerous scientific publications since the episode aired.

Simpsons fans can’t think of “embiggen” without thinking of the other fake word used to describe it: cromulent. Clearly, this word should be included on this list as well – if it weren’t for the fact that the Webster’s American dictionary added it to their “New Millenium” edition a few years ago. The official definition: fine, acceptable.

Bonus words:

The above words are probably the most credible options for inclusion in the American dictionary. Some bonus words that almost made the cut are listed below. See if you remember them.

Jeebus

Blurst

Debigulator/rebigulator

Foilage

Saxomophone

Tramampaline

Avoison

Chocotastic

Groin-Grabbingly

Sacrilicious

Science Pole

Squishee

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I figured since we started the day with some Olivia Munn goodness here in the Celebs section, we’d finish up with some Olivia Munn goodness. That and the fact that I came across these smokin’ hot outtakes from Olivia Munn’s Maxim spread. That too. (Oh! And pleeease tell me she isn’t dating Dane Cook. Please?)

Excuse our rather feeble attempt at toilet humor here but this screen grab from last night’s Super Bowl looks almost too good to be true.

Yes, there is a “Gay” on the Saints football team, Randall Gay to be exact. And what these two Colts players are doing could also be construed as “gay”.

And like Jerry Seinfeld so eloquently said years ago…

“Everyone thinks we’re gay!… Not that there’s anything wrong with that.” That seems like a most appropriate caption.

I am firmly in the camp of Team Bruce in this one. Yes, life has its ups and downs, but what better to bring joy to the masses than a dog in silly costumes? I mean, when I die (probably a couple Tuesdays from now), I’m completely okay with a cute dog coming into my wake dressed like a Rastafarian. Just because I’m gone doesn’t mean that it stopped being funny. Ditto for how I love making corpses dance around by working them like they were oversized marionettes. I’d be a hypocrite if I didn’t allow it.

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Somehow Megan Fox has landed another movie role. Amazing how far her looks have taken her, isn’t it? This time she’s in some movie called Jonah Hex. For those unfamilar, Jonah Woodson Hex is a fictional character, a Western comic book antihero created by writer John Albano and artist Tony DeZuniga and published by DC Comics. The right side of his face is horribly scarred. He was an officer for the Confederacy during the American Civil War, fought at Gettysburg and is normally shown wearing a tattered Confederate States Army jacket. Josh Brolin plays him in this movie. Megan plays Leila, which somehow gets her top billing on IMDB. Mabye the boys at IMDB just saw these pics and figured she should have top billing regardless… Understandable.