15 people you’ll wish you were this St. Patrick’s Day
You’ll be stupid drunk, we’ll be stupid drunk, mistakes will happen. When you slide down that slippery slope of sobriety, here are 15 people to aspire to be on the way down.
1. Cop taking down an obnoxious little drunk guy
Taking down an annoying drunk guy while his girlfriend completely abandons him has to be a satisfying experience, cop or not. (via)
2. Guy dishing out a cold-blooded burn on Facebook
Finally, red heads and black people can share something besides Malcolm X. (via)
3. Girl triple-fisting beers and a cigarette in a classy t-shirt
Her cigarette may have fallen but she’s still standing.
4. Girl who can’t keep her balance
…and the other side of the coin. (via)
5. Dog dressed in a Celtic kilt
He doesn’t even get to drink anything but damn he looks so classy. (via)
6. Cabby who learned an important lesson
Better to have the bucket than to be the bucket. (via)
7. Anyone riding this Chicago river dyed green for St. Patrick’s Day
It’d be like living in the best Dr. Seuss hallucination combined with the best Irish car bomb hallucination.
8. Girl posting bong rips to Tumblr
Alcohol isn’t for everyone. At least one other person on Tumblr will share in your solitary St. Pat’s experience. (via)
9. Luigi in a parade
Magic mushrooms are extra potent when mixed with Guinness, apparently.
10. Super drunk St. Patrick’s Day dancers
Someone here just got served.
11. Whoever got to the bottom of this giveaway
I see no way that could have ended poorly. (via)
12. This guy with his friends
He may not be able to stand, but at least he’s got two guys to lean on.
13. Girl eating it during a keg stand
And she still attempted to continue drinking. You’re a hero to us all.
14. Drunk guy giving a news report
Say what you will, but he’s a better journalist than most people doing local news.
15. Your bartender at an Irish pub
Living life like she’s Scrooge McDuck for one day only. (via)