70-year-old woman on toilet robbed by clown
Chris Spags I love headlines that look like Mad Libs, as is the case with this story about a 70-year-old woman getting robbed while sitting on the toilet in her Akron, Ohio home.
Police say that Jacqueline Cutright was sitting on the toilet when 22-year-old Cory Buckley broke into her home looking for cash and drugs.
Buckley, clad in a creepy clown mask, allegedly told the woman that he wanted some Oxycontin and cash.
When Buckley demanded money, Cutright told him from the toilet, “Boy did you break into the wrong house – a poor person lives here,” according to Fox8.
Buckley made out with $28 cash and about $1,000 in costume jewelry, along with Cutright’s 1991 Ford Escort.
Police tracked down Buckley a block away. He’ll be charged with robbery with a deadly weapon, burglary with a deadly weapon, along with other charges.
I think it’s safe to say that this is the least successful crime ever. Making out with $28 dollars, fake jewelry, and a car better suited to store a hooker’s dead body in than be driven on the road is a bit of a loss.
On the plus side, Buckley did exactly what I expect a person wearing a clown mask to do. You don’t put on a creepy clown face to assist the elderly at a nursing home or give money to animal shelters. Though it would be ironic if you did wear one to assist sufferers of beauty product addiction.
Clown Robs Woman on Toilet [AOL News]
Police: ‘Clown’ Robs Elderly Woman on Commode [Fox 8]
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