Goat breaks into California strip club

Posted by Chris Spags on January 19th, 2010 at 12:33 pm

Everybody loves strip clubs, except for strippers who have no soul and are thus incapable of feelings such as “love”. But did you know that animals also love strip clubs? They must, if you’re to believe this surveillance footage of a goat breaking into a Palm Springs area strip club.

A 150 pound goat smashed [its] way into his business. It gets on [its] hind legs and rammed into the quarter inch think glass. It breaks through one door, then starts ramming another one, before trotting inside.

Why would a goat try to break into a strip club? The best the owner can figure, the goat saw it’s reflection in the door and got aggressive.

The goat spent the next a half hour dazed, staring at itself in a mirror.

Reports that the goat tucked its genitals in between its thighs and said “I’d f**k me” while dancing to Goodbye Horses were not confirmed by the surveillance video. You can see the video of the goat’s “ram-page” here. The club owner said the goat did $2000 worth of damage to his club.

It’s good to see that we have more in common with goats than we realized. What man hasn’t been in that goat’s hooves? Every time I’ve gone to a strip club and spent $20 on a Heineken and had to watch a woman with stretchmarks dancing her coke habit away, I’ve have probably gotten more joy out of running headfirst into the wall then staring at myself in a mirror too. Much better than attempting to discuss politics with Candi or Cristal during a lap dance. Strippers are notoriously conservative.

[KESQ]

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Chris Spags "Internet Heartthrob" Chris Spags is a former comic and the founding editor of Guyism.com. In addition to overseeing all Guyism content and business development, he covers Humor for the site daily. He was recognized on the street once and it was awesome.