Pleasuring yourself on the subway is not a great idea

Chris Spags Founder and Editor

I don’t know that there was ever a time in which beating it on a train was what one might call a “good idea,” but in the age of cell phones, doing it now can indeed lead to even more troubles than finding it difficult to finish due to the train’s bumpiness. If you do it, you might end up like this guy, caught on a cell phone while committing public masturbation on an NYC subway.

Cops are searching for a subway pervert who they say exposed and fondled himself in front of an 18-year-old woman in Queens.

The sicko sat across from the teen on a Queens-bound G train at the Woodhaven Blvd. station in Elmhurst on Nov. 7 at about 3a.m., cops said.

He allegedly stared at the victim and pleasured himself.

The woman bolted from the train when the doors opened and boarded a Brooklyn-bound train out of the station, police said.

The best part…look at this photo of the dude. It doesn’t look like he’s in the act in the photo, does it? So, based upon this girl’s claim that she sprinted out of the train when the doors opened, that means she photographed the guy before he started exposing himself and taking care of business. Because if he’s jacking it while staring at her as she works her camera with that completely non-chalant look on his face, that’s just creepy. Even by “I’m pulling out my johnson and cranking one on the train” standards. If you’re going to brazenly beat it on the train, at least look like you’re enjoying yourself. You can find out more in my new book Chris’s Rules for Proper Etiquette Whilst Pleasuring Yourself in Public Places. Time to bring an air of class to public milkings.

[NY Daily News]

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