Police on search for supermarket ass sniffer

There are many creep-related crimes out there that terrorize the innocent women of cities across the world. But what about this one, caught on video, of a man who walks up to a random male grocery store worker and takes a healthy whiff of his butt, dog style? That’s got to rank pretty highly up there in man-on-man creepishness.

The bespectacled, middle aged man has been seen on two separate occasions sniffing the arse of an unidentified male shop assistant in the Plymouth branch of the Co-Op supermarket. The stores CCTV cameras filmed the oddball on two consecutive weekends going about his funny business, Devon police are appealing for witnesses to the attacks which took place on 31st of October and 7th November this year.

It’s unclear as to if the two separate occasions were this guy sniffing the same male worker or if he was sniffing different asses. One would have to assume the latter since variety is the spice of life.

But then again, maybe this one particular male shop worker just has an enrapturingly scented rectum. Who’s to say? Maybe this poor bald man was just walking down the aisle and he got a faint whiff of the guy’s butt and decided, “Wow, I have never smelled anything so gorgeous before. It’s like a freshly showered angel’s taint.” All I’m saying is that maybe we should be so quick to judge this guy. I think if this guy gets caught, the jury and judge should all have to sniff the shop worker’s ass to make an accurate assessment. If they all end up following him around begging to bury their faces in his crack, we’ll know that ol’ heroin poop chute is just a special gentleman deserving of all our love, adoration, and addiction.

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