This is why you shouldn’t dance past a certain age

Once you get past a certain age, you’ve got to leave childish things behind like dancing or drugs or sleeping with teenagers. Because any time you do them after your prime, you end up looking like this.

While I didn’t spend a whole lot of time on the Melbourne Rave Shuffling scene like this guy claims to have, I do know what good dancing looks like and doesn’t look like. And generally speaking, it doesn’t look like someone having a seizure atop a puddle of lube.

That said, if you’re going to do this, at least look like you’re having fun. Nothing screams “I’m a douchebag” quite like you making a completely serious face while doing something you’re transparently awful at. It’s like the old guy who puts on a headband and old school basketball shorts that are cut up to his pelvis. And who raves without the drugs? You’d be better off trying to canoe without water. At least that way, people would assume you’re insane rather than just stupid.

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