Woman found guilty of stalking herself

Stalking is a pretty serious crime for all the involved parties; black ski masks and gloves and powerful telescopes don’t grow on trees. But one woman was so desperate for attention or something that she attempted to cajole a local shop owner into committing violent acts against her by sending letters from an anonymous menace.

A WOMAN has been found guilty of stalking, in a bizarre case in which she tried to organise acts of violence against herself.

The matriarch of a well-known Central Highlands family, Ellen Hazel Triffett, 53, was given a suspended jail sentence yesterday for stalking her local store owner.

The Hobart Magistrates Court heard Bronte Park general store owner Wayne Turale started receiving a series of disturbing letters in October 2006.

Over 18 months, he received 10 of the poorly written letters, instructing him to perform or organise acts of violence against Mrs Triffett, who was one of his customers.

The sinister mail was extremely disturbing and upsetting, he said.

Whenever I make a crack about someone’s looks, random passerby commenters usually rail on me for being superficial and whatever. But seriously, look at Ms. Triffett, pictured above. My initial reaction when I read the article was, “That’s a woman?” And I was genuinely surprised that she was a woman and am currently seeking advanced gender tests to be conducted just to make sure.

So given all of that, it seems painfully obvious why this woman would be desperate for the shop owner to attack her. I can’t imagine any other way anyone would ever be paying attention to her (and yes, I saw the article credited her as a “Mrs.” but I have a hard time buying that one). I’d be more likely to stalk a loaded shotgun with my mouth than I would this woman. At least the taste would probably be better.

[The Mercury]



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Chris Spags "Internet Heartthrob" Chris Spags is a former comic and the founding editor of Guyism.com. In addition to overseeing all Guyism content and business development, he covers Humor for the site daily. He was recognized on the street once and it was awesome.

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