7 things a woman is thinking the ‘morning after’

Jenni Maier

Woman Morning After Thoughts 7 things a woman is thinking the morning after

Wei Tchou, Flickr


Have you ever woken up completely naked next to a total stranger who is trying her hardest to pretend to still be asleep while simultaneously wrapping your arms around her? As you lay there eyes wide open trying to remember her name and how you even met, she’s fantasizing about how the rest of the day is going to go. While there are plenty of women who sneak out of the room to do a walk of shame before you even wake-up, the one who stays in bed with you is a different kind of woman. So while you’re trying to gently remove your arm from under her body (it falls asleep every single time), here’s what she’s thinking.

Photo credit: Wei Tchou, Flickr

7 You Will Cuddle
It’s clinically proven that 93% woman could cuddle all day – even if she doesn’t like the guy. If the man moves one inch closer to her on the bed (whether he’s awake or not) she’ll interpret that as a signal to spoon and if you accidentally graze her thigh she’ll assume you want a gentle make-out session.

6 You Will Talk
Ideally a woman would love to spend the morning in bed completely naked talking about everything from favorite ethnic food to first kisses to her mean boss. She wants to get out of that bed and be able to say that you know her better than anybody else in the world.

5 You Will Eat
After the cuddling and intimate talking sesh are over, she prays that you are a secret gourmet chef who makes amazing (egg-white only) omelette’s and heart-shaped pancakes. And if you’re not a gourmet chef she’ll hope real hard that you’ll offer to take her out to breakfast where you can continue sharing life stories.

4 You Will Make Plans
She wants to make definite plans and none of that wishy-washy I’ll find your number online and I’ll call you sometime next month stuff. She wants a specific day and a specific event. Whether it’s happy hour on Friday or sushi and movies on Saturday she doesn’t want to leave you until something is set in stone and preferably also signed in blood.

3 You Will Exchange Information
As soon as she leaves your side, she’s going home to look you up online and find out everything about you. She’ll expect you make it easier for her by exchanging numbers, e-mails, Facebook passwords, old Myspace names and more. At the very least she’ll ask for your last name.

2 You Will Be a Gentleman
Whether it’s your front door, a subway stop, or her car that’s still at the bar, she’ll expect you to behave like a gentleman and make sure she gets home as safely and conveniently as possible. If cab fare is involved she’ll want you to offer to pay.

1 You Will Ask Her to Spend the Day Together
She’s hoping at the very last second before you kiss her goodbye, you’ll ask her to cancel all her plans so you can spend the day together doing romantic things like picnicking in the park or drinking wine in front of a fireplace.

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