4 of the universe’s best pizzas

Colin Joliat Alcohol & Food Editor

The debate about what style of pizza is the best will never die, but leave it to New York to claim they have the best of every one of them.

I didn’t wake up this morning hoping to see a grown man sexualize pizzas, but I’ll go to sleep happy to have learned the term “tip sag.” If at first you thought it was just happenstance, he made sure to hammer home the innuendo with the addition of upskirt and flaccid.¬†Coincidence? I think not. The repeated use of the word thick seems suspect as well given that, when compared to Chicago style, it wasn’t actually girthy at all.

I’ve only been to New York a handful of times, so I tried any of these pizzas, but I can safely say that there’s no such thing as a “museum quality specimen.” We all know if you tried to put a slice on display that a tiny cowboy Owen Wilson would eat it in a New York minute.

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