Before everyone gets all finicky about what the definition of “cure” is just accept that in this case we’re going to say it’s more synonymous with “preventative measure” than “hooray I did this thing and am no longer hungover.” Complain all you want, but that’s the best science can do for you right now – not that you should be complaining in the first place. If you haven’t figured out that chugging a bottle of water before bed kills 99% of hangovers yet, you’re living life wrong.
That’s not the “cure” though, don’t worry. That would be dumb. Instead the supposed cure is….drum roll please….
la la la la….
more la la la la…
ASIAN PEARS! Sort of dumb still but not nearly as bad! Whoo!
Australian scientists at CSIRO found that consuming pears or pear juice before drinking can dramatically reduce the symptoms of hangovers – in particular, memory loss and trouble concentrating.
The researchers have so far only tested the Asian or Korean pear, commonly used as a hangover cure in the Far East, but plan to widen the test to discover if the same results can be achieved using the Western pear.
The researchers believe the pear juice helped to metabolise alcohol in the blood.
Manny Noakes, research director at CSIRO, says: ‘Reductions were seen in blood acetaldehyde levels, the toxic metabolic thought to be responsible for the hangover symptoms, with pear juice consumption.(via)
“Overall hangover severity” in those who drank the pear juice was said to have been reduced considerably when compared against test subjects who ingested a placebo, with “the most pronounced effect seen on the specific symptom of ‘trouble concentrating’.”
However, keep in mind that this only works if you drink the pear juice BEFORE consuming alcohol – doing so afterwards won’t do shit. So throw out all that sugary cranberry juice and whatever other chasers you’ve got sitting in your house, because all you need is 220ml of Asian pear juice and you’ll be set for a night of heavy drinking, blacking out and regrettable drunk text messages.
