I Want: This radio-controlled lawn mower

Nothing pains my ass more than having to refill the cooler on my riding law mower every week and lolly gag around the yard for a couple of hours cutting crap that in three days is going to look like I didn’t do anything to it. Especially so during baseball season when I would rather have my ass planted firmly on the couch with the cool breeze blowing through the window while I sip on some lemonade (okay, vodka). But now mowing the lawn can actually be fun! Thanks to the Evatech GOAT Robot 22T!!!

[This] mower can be manned from up to 2,000 feet away as it takes on 70-degree slopes at 8MPH. It’s track system not only creates stability—it’s perfect for winter traction as you can plow your driveway with a shovel attachment.

So what if it’s almost $12,000… It’ll be totally worth it just to be able to use it to terrorize all the kids, pets and old people in my neighborhood. Screw them and their block party…

(Sources: Evatech via Gizmodo)

--- Did you like this article? And you probably like contests, exclusive content, and smug commentary right? Then why aren't you liking Guyism on Facebook? Show some pride and click the "Like" button below right now: