The ultimate bucket list for men: 50 things to do before you die
A. Isaac 17 Drive On The Autobahn
You’ve probably hit 100 mph once or twice in your Ford pickup truck. Maybe you’re even one of the rare people that have gone 125 mph on an American highway without getting caught. But the Autobahn is quite a different beast. There is a general speed limit of 80 mph but it’s merely a suggestion. If you have the need for speed, this is certainly your spot.
16 Live In A House With A Multitude Of Women
This may seem sexual in nature or even a script out of a porn flick, but I can assure you, it’s neither of those things. Every man needs to live with a few non-familial women to realize how bat sh-t crazy they are. Guaranteed 50% drop in the divorce rate if every man was forced to do this before getting hitched.
15 Hit A Target A Mile Away With A Scoped Rifle
Whether you’re a gun nut or not is irrelevant here. Successfully hitting a target from that distance is an accomplishment few on Earth can brag about.
14 Host Saturday Night Live
Despite the fact that Saturday Night Live is a shell of what it once was, it remains unmatched in the variety show industry. Hosts have included some of the greatest comedians of all-time to former vice presidents of the United States. Quite a crowd to be a part of.
13 Be On The Set Of A Rap Video
So you’re not a fan of rap eh? Well, ignore the music and enjoy the scenery. Sit back and relax with girls in bikinis, daisy dukes and more than enough Crystal to keep you inebriated for several hours.
12 Have The Ace of Cakes Make You A Personalized Cake
If there was ever a time to be over-extravagant with a food idea, this is it. That guy Duff can probably make you an exact replica of your favorite sports stadium or even, dare I say, get the intricacies of your ladies favorite body part down to a freckle on the cake he makes you. Yea, that probably went too far.
11 Skydive
Yet another one of those thrill seeking adventures every man needs to experience before they die. And while some would argue that skydiving is a bit tired in comparison to say, base jumping, I respond most kindly: YOU’RE JUMPING OUT OF A GODDAMN PLANE.
10 Eat Chicken & Waffles
Sure, there are probably food combinations that are more tasty. There are probably even food combinations that are more unique. But undoubtedly, you won’t find one that encompasses both like Chicken & Waffles. Most people describe their first experience as heavenly, others say it’s like having a food orgasm. We’ll let you decide for yourself.
9 Make A Sex Tape With A Celeb
No doubt this is an extremely hard feat to accomplish. But then again, hang out in Hollywood long enough and buy some of these skanks a few drinks and who knows. Doesn’t necessarily need to be an A-list celeb either. I’m more than sure Lindsay Lohan will be willing to oblige your request for some beer money.
8 Successfully Brew Your Own Beer
You’ll probably create some real skunky stuff the first few times around. But after some mad scientist type experimentation, you might create something that you and your buddies will find tolerable.
7 Go To Rio Carnival
Let’s try to put this in terms you’ll understand. You’re familiar with Mardi Gras right? Well, the Rio Carnival is like Mardi Gras on crack, with a side of meth.
6 Catch A Home Run/Foul Ball
It’s the ultimate fan user experience. Actor Charlie Sheen once went so far as buying out the seats for an entire section just so he could catch a home run ball. And a foul ball? Not much different. Well, that is unless you’re Steve Bartman.
5 Go Mach 2 In A Jet
A Chuck Yeager you are not and surely an inverted dive on a MIG like Maverick in “Top Gun” is not in the cards. But your buddy in the Air Force can pull some strings and get you in a jet. Take full advantage–but do yourself a favor and bring a barf bag. You’ll need it at those speeds.
4 Drink Germans Under The Table At Oktoberfest
In the movie “Beerfest”, the American contingent was completely embarrassed the first time they went over to compete against the Germans. Use that as your fuel when you head over for Oktoberfest and drink stein upon steins of beer. You may want to strap on your lederhosen while you’re at it. At the very least, it’ll give you a better chance with the fine German women.
3 Make A Trip To The Red Light District
If Vegas is considered “Sin City”, then Amsterdam’s Red-light district must be the 7th rung of hell. Truly, one of those places where what happens there, stays there.
2 Pretend to Salsa Dance So You Can Score With A Hot Latina
You just met a hot Latina at this new Salsa bar you heard about. She asks you to dance and unfortunately, your best moves are the Robot and a rather unfortunate version of the Riverdance. Do you embarrass yourself thoroughly in a lame attempt to hook up with her? Absolutely!
1 Be The Guy Who Oils Up Models for Bikini Shoots
Certainly there are men out there who love their jobs. Men who wake up every morning eager to get their day started at work. But I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt, their job pales in comparison to the man featured left who oils up models for a living– specifically bootylicious ladies like Vida Guerra. God Bless this man and God Bless the U.S.A.
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