10 THINGS I LEARNED FROM THE OLYMPICS

1. I learned that a country can exploit children because apparently “winning is the only thing that matters”.

2. I learned that the IOC is like the WWE of the Sporting World.

3. I learned that without the use of performance enhancing drugs, U.S. sprinters just aren’t as dominant

4. I learned that you can be an intolerable country 99% of the time, but when the Olympics come your way, the media forgets about it.

5. I learned that team basketball can still be a concept amongst NBA superstars.

6. I learned that maybe Egyptians aren’t as athletic as I once thought them to be (1 Medal with 104 athletes)

7. I learned that you can suck at a sport but still be massively popular (please see Leryn Franco)

8. I learned that Michael Phelps will probably be the talk of the world the next couple of weeks but that people will forget who he is by Halloween.

9. I learned that George W has way too much free time on his hands.

10. I learned that if you ever want to have meaningless sex with hot, horny chicks from other countries, make your way into Olympic Village at any cost.

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