Jennifer Lawrence reminds you who to root for in the tourney

A. Isaac Senior Editor

Your rooting interests for the NCAA tournament is as follows:

1) Your team.
2) The underdog.
3) Whatever wins you a billion dollars.
4) Whoever Jennifer Lawrence wants to win.

So what I’m trying to say is: Go Cards!

For what it’s worth, Jennifer’s not a front-runner, she’s actually from Louisville. Unrelated, I hate her hair. Love her boobs though—and basically everything else about her. Even her armpit sweat. That’s kinda gross, but kinda hot.

Yeah, I need to put myself in timeout.

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