Guyism » George W. Bush

President Bush can bury people alive

Chris Spags — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 14:31:52 +0000

Earlier this year, legal expert and former Deputy Assistant Attorney General John Yoo testified in front of a panel seeking information about detainee interrogation tactics during the Bush administration. The question “Can the President order someone to be buried alive?” was posed to Yoo. Here’s his flustered, non-committal response.

So yes, the President can, in fact, order you to be buried alive. And while it’s not expressly said, he can also urinate on said grave. He can also then shoot you in the head if you come back to Earth as a zombie hungry for both brains and revenge. And he can then put your recently zombified body into dog food to breed an army of superzombiedogs. So yeah, being the President has its perks.

Honestly, President Bush only has a month left in office. Why not start taking advantage of this privilege for anyone who looks at your cross-eyed? People have been mean to him for years, it’s time to extract revenge. One open grave at a time.

Also, below, is a .gif of President Bush getting the shoes thrown at his head at a press conference about Iraq yesterday. Because that’s also funny and important.

Caption this…

DC Scrap — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 16:00:00 +0000

H/T: micklanders

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DC Scrap — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 17:30:00 +0000

MLB: Buehrle says Floyd might crash, burn under playoff heat
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CFB: Ohio University lineman wins $250,000
CFB: Ohio State starter suspended for first two games
OLYMPICS: High sexual charge in Olympic Village
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OLYMPICS: Bush gives pep talks to U.S. Olympians in Beijing
VIDEO GAMES: EA wants you to punch Kim Kardashian in the face

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Oliver Stone's W trailer released

Chris Spags — Mon, 28 Jul 2008 14:05:04 +0000

Via AICN comes this pretty awesome trailer of the new Oliver Stone film about George W. Bush’s life, cleverly entitled W. Worth the watch, I think.

Call me crazy, but I think this trailer almost paints “Dubya” (as the cool politicos call him) in a sympathetic light. Which continues the staunch tradition of conservativism that flows through Hollywood. Those Hollywood fat cats blindly support our Republican brethren with their pro-war. pro-energy-gluttony agendas. Just once, I’d like to hear one of our sublimely intelligent Hollywood actors or directors talk about some liberal issue, just once. Your stuffed shirt biases will stand no longer, entertainers of America!

But yeah, that was funnier in my head. Anyway the movie will be good if Oliver Stone stops doing lines of blow long enough to realize that not everyone gives a crap about his hatred for conservatives. The only way this movie works is if people think that George Bush is a guy who’s just been pulled in too many ways as part of a larger problem of society/parenting/the bourgeois. If the movie just turns into a cheap way to mock a presidency before it’s even over and it’s just clips of George Bush falling off a tricycle or getting a football to the groin, I’ll be kind of annoyed.