She won’t be taking her golden chastity belt off anytime soon.

The 22-year-old California virgin who auctioned off her virtue online for $3.8 million has yet to meet her winning bidder in the flesh – because his wife won’t let him.

Natalie Dylan (not her real name) admitted the deal had fallen through.

Last week, she got a phone call from the rogue Romeo, a 38-year-old Australian real-estate businessman, who said he had to back out.

“I told him to go back into marriage therapy,” sniped Dylan.

[via]

Say what you will about the other girl selling her virginity Natalie Dylan (and many of you commenters certainly did), but she has a lot more going for her than this girl…including four working limbs.

Welcome! You are bidding on a 19 yr old quadriplegic girl for her VIRGINITY!!!
I may not look much to you but you can did what ever fantasies you have on me! You will need to pay for a hotel with wheelchair access or make sure your house is accessable! Don’t have to use condoms!
Feel free to e-mail any questions! Bank Deposit accepted only! Enjoy! Thankyou! Good Luck!

I’m all for women opting to take control of their destiny. Though in this case (assuming it was real because dammit I want to believe), it probably was just someone looking to sell this girl without her knowledge. Which makes sense because it’s pretty humane to see a quadriplegic mess and think, “Hmm, I wonder how much money I would get for someone who wants to split her hymen?” That’s a little something called entrepreneurship. It’s practically the exact same thing as creating the Ford Model T for the first time, especially when you consider that they’re both poorly constructed, can’t move without wheels, and would provide you the same amount of pleasure when f’ing it.

Natalie Dylan, a 22-year-old San Diego woman, said she got the idea for the auction after her sister was able to pay for her college education after prostituting herself for three weeks, according to the London Telegraph.

Dylan has a degree in women’s studies. She told the paper she hopes to pay for an advanced degree in family and marriage therapy with the proceeds from the auction.

She told the Telegraph that she doesn’t think she’s the only one who will be benefit from the auction.

“I think me and the person I do it with will both profit greatly from the deal,” Dylan told the paper.

It’s ridiculous to me that it’s taking this long for her to receive a gentleman caller in her reproductive orifice. If it were me and I offered $3.8 million to some girl looking to sell her virginity and she took literally months to get around to telling me yes or no, I’d probably be a bit insulted (and would probably console myself by building myself a new woman with all the money I have lying around for frivolous ventures, part of the fundraising work by my team at Shitty Investments Capital). There are gorgeous non-professional-whoring women on the street whom you could offer that money too and they’d probably end up giving you a rimjob wherever you please just to sniff your bank statements.

All I’m saying is put up or shut up Natalie Dylan. Only you could find a way to make the idea of a 22 year-old college girl getting ravaged by a strange man for the first time into an utterly annoying process.

[quote via]

According to the Dennis Hof, owner of the whorehouse subsidizing the mission, the Bunny Ranch in Nevada, Dylan’s got a couple offers.

“We have offers from $1 million to $3.8 million, and we have started collecting deposits,” Dennis exclusively tells Scandalist. But the highest bidder won’t necessarily win Natalie’s heart, and virginity. As Natalie told Scandalist, she won’t do the deed with just anyone, but hopes to find someone who “seems intelligent.” Although her personal top pick, Barack Obama, has not placed a bid, Natalie has some excellent potential first-time partners.

Dennis said, “There are a few people she likes. She has been e-mailing and talking on the phone with several men. She wants to be comfortable.” With the possible $3.8 million Natalie could receive, surely she will be more than comfortable.

Well, it’s great to see that the vagina futures market has rallied along with the rest of the stock market, but that’s just silly. To think that some girl who’s willing to allow some random, probable mess of a man would forego an extra $2.8 million just because one guy “felt more right” is kind of absurd. You know what’d feel right? Taking a dip in a pool full of gold coins like Scrooge McDuck. I mean, theoretically. It’d probably be kind of painful. In fact, I don’t know how a fairly small duck was able to swim through piles of solid gold. Seems like you’d hurt yourself more often than not. Those ducks have some life.

Aside: In terms of future forecasting, I expect the price for her second time having sex to decline about, oh, 3800%. It’s not really a renewable resource. That’s why you have to have multiple daughters to sell on the black market. It’s science.

[Even more photos here]