Adorable dog incompetence rules the day as this puppy tries to carry a rake in the house only to be repeatedly denied by the door frames’ constricting width.

Clearly this Sideshow Bob-like dog isn’t German or Japanese. “How do we get this new car to run?” “Well, ]]>

Adorable dog incompetence rules the day as this puppy tries to carry a rake in the house only to be repeatedly denied by the door frames’ constricting width.

Clearly this Sideshow Bob-like dog isn’t German or Japanese. “How do we get this new car to run?” “Well, it’s obvious, Helmut. We must turn in a circle then immediately repeat the same action. That is how all things in engineering must function.”

Stay strong, Max. If you keep working hard, you can achieve anything!

Kate Upton taught us how to dougie. Even Nickelodeon character Doug taught us how to dougie. But can any of them top this bird?

Not gonna lie: Kind of ruined it for me to see the silhouette of the person dancing for the bird to mimic. ]]>

Kate Upton taught us how to dougie. Even Nickelodeon character Doug taught us how to dougie. But can any of them top this bird?

Not gonna lie: Kind of ruined it for me to see the silhouette of the person dancing for the bird to mimic. I mean, yeah, the bird doing it is still impressive. It’s just not as impressive than if he did it all on his own.

Yes I’m being hypercritical of a bird dancing to a two-year-old hip hop song. This is my life.

Do you find Siberian huskies to be adorable but generally lacking in objects stuck on their heads? Look no further than this puppy who somehow ended up trapped in a box.

The owner guy going “What are you doing, Mr. Puff?” deserves all of the accidental dog-testicle ]]>

Do you find Siberian huskies to be adorable but generally lacking in objects stuck on their heads? Look no further than this puppy who somehow ended up trapped in a box.

The owner guy going “What are you doing, Mr. Puff?” deserves all of the accidental dog-testicle squishing that will occur over the next decade just for that one moment.

This is Boomer, a pit bull. He doesn’t want to take a bath. And his reaction to being asked about taking one is the funniest thing you’ll see today.

I respect this dog’s philosophy on life. Screw that whole “make lemonade” mantra…when life hands you lemons, you should sprint away, ]]>

This is Boomer, a pit bull. He doesn’t want to take a bath. And his reaction to being asked about taking one is the funniest thing you’ll see today.

I respect this dog’s philosophy on life. Screw that whole “make lemonade” mantra…when life hands you lemons, you should sprint away, only to return and pose adorably when those problems disappear. You’re the man now, dog.

In this video, a little child wearing a zebra print hoodie meets a lion behind the glass. The lion thinks the kid is a baby zebra and acts accordingly. It’s hilarious and yet one shattered piece of Plexiglass away from being the saddest thing to ever occur.

I was waiting ]]>

In this video, a little child wearing a zebra print hoodie meets a lion behind the glass. The lion thinks the kid is a baby zebra and acts accordingly. It’s hilarious and yet one shattered piece of Plexiglass away from being the saddest thing to ever occur.

I was waiting for the kid to look behind him and go, “Holy shit, that big terrifying cat is trying eat me” or some similar little kid variation. Instead, he handled the situation with more cool than I would have as a 27-year-old adult. I’m not saying this kid should want to be a TV wildlife personality…but we definitely need him to be one. Otherwise, nothing in this world makes sense.

This AMAZING photo comes from the University of Colorado-Boulder’s CU Independent. Background: A bear was in a tree in the UC-Boulder area and needed to be tranquilized to get out. This is the result.

Credit: Andy Duann/CU Independent

No one was harmed in ]]>

This AMAZING photo comes from the University of Colorado-Boulder’s CU Independent. Background: A bear was in a tree in the UC-Boulder area and needed to be tranquilized to get out. This is the result.

Credit: Andy Duann/CU Independent

No one was harmed in the situation. The bear safely landed on the padded mat and will be relocated back into the woods by wildlife officials.

He also looks like he’s a kid showing off on a trampoline so…there’s that.

Meet Meow. The completely uncreatively-named cat is two years old and weights 39 pounds, over 25 pounds heavier than he should be for his age. He was turned over to animal control by his 87-year-old owner. Watch his struggle.

What kind of a shithead old person do ]]>

Meet Meow. The completely uncreatively-named cat is two years old and weights 39 pounds, over 25 pounds heavier than he should be for his age. He was turned over to animal control by his 87-year-old owner. Watch his struggle.

What kind of a shithead old person do you have to be to make your two-year-old cat three times the size he should be? He looks like a throw rug at this point. You couldn’t have cut down his portions a bit 20 pounds ago? I just wish the old woman had kept Meow long enough for him to eat her when she inevitably dies in the next month or so. If he’s going to be fat, there should at least be a Tales from the Crypt-ish ironic upside.

Frogs and I have had a tenuous relationship outside of our ability to work together to adequately navigate oncoming traffic. But this frog sitting on a bench like a human is easily my favorite frog in the history of frogs. Sorry, Bud, Weis, and Er.

I’d like to take a ]]>

Frogs and I have had a tenuous relationship outside of our ability to work together to adequately navigate oncoming traffic. But this frog sitting on a bench like a human is easily my favorite frog in the history of frogs. Sorry, Bud, Weis, and Er.

I’d like to take a moment to salute YouTube commenters for stepping their game up. Whenever I see a strong top comment like this one, it restores a lot of my faith in Internet humanity:

via @DaveStopera

A squirrel somehow got its head stuck in a potato chip bag. Despite the relative nastiness of squirrels, some guy helped free him. It’s a tale of triumph. And squirrel stupidity.

Had the YouTube video been titled just slightly differently, I would have absolutely guessed this ended ]]>

A squirrel somehow got its head stuck in a potato chip bag. Despite the relative nastiness of squirrels, some guy helped free him. It’s a tale of triumph. And squirrel stupidity.

Had the YouTube video been titled just slightly differently, I would have absolutely guessed this ended with the squirrel eating the face of the guy trying to help it. Rocky and Bullwinkle may have done a lot for squirrels in popular culture but I wouldn’t trust a single one of them with any part of my anatomy. Even if they put on a wig and makeup like Bugs Bunny used to do to seduce Elmer Fudd. Fool me once, squirrel.

Via Reddit comes this photo of a girl seemingly getting bitchslapped by the most emotive turtle I’ve ever seen photographed. Must-see pic.

I could not be less interested in turtles or any other reptiles (barring genetic mutations that lead to them being mentored ]]>

Via Reddit comes this photo of a girl seemingly getting bitchslapped by the most emotive turtle I’ve ever seen photographed. Must-see pic.

I could not be less interested in turtles or any other reptiles (barring genetic mutations that lead to them being mentored by a rat until they achieve crimefighting ninja glory) but this turtle has really captured my heart. His angrily scowl, his Rick James-like commitment to the art of the bitch slap. Just tremendous work by all involved parties.

This is a dog attempting to stay awake. But he is incredibly tired. Such is the natural dramatic tension that is nature. Oh, it’s also really f’ing cute. Watch!

“Puppy’s a narcoleptic, always sleeping on Hov,” said an indignant Jay-Z in his new album of dog-based parodies, ]]>

This is a dog attempting to stay awake. But he is incredibly tired. Such is the natural dramatic tension that is nature. Oh, it’s also really f’ing cute. Watch!

“Puppy’s a narcoleptic, always sleeping on Hov,” said an indignant Jay-Z in his new album of dog-based parodies, The Bark Album. Too bad he vowed not to use the word bitch any more after his daughter’s birth.

Tokyo Jungle is a game in which humans are long gone and animals have taken the earth back. So what are they doing in our place? Wearing goofy hats and having sex in public places. Just like people!

The notion of the meek inheriting the earth is hardly groundbreaking. ]]>

Tokyo Jungle is a game in which humans are long gone and animals have taken the earth back. So what are they doing in our place? Wearing goofy hats and having sex in public places. Just like people!

The notion of the meek inheriting the earth is hardly groundbreaking. But it’s the insane assortment of furry creatures that makes this particular game such a hoot. Everything from hyaenas and bears to pomeranians and baby chickens?

If there is a God above, this game will eventually make its way out to America. But only for $20. The graphics are simply atrocious, and anything more would be highway robbery.

“It’s like Babe: Pig in the City meets Oliver and Company,” says the guy who pitches YouTube videos to movie studios unsuccessfully.

I’ve read before that pigs can make excellent pets if they’re trained correctly and don’t get too big. So seeing this pig play fetch with the dogs is ]]>

“It’s like Babe: Pig in the City meets Oliver and Company,” says the guy who pitches YouTube videos to movie studios unsuccessfully.

I’ve read before that pigs can make excellent pets if they’re trained correctly and don’t get too big. So seeing this pig play fetch with the dogs is a big proof of concept for me. I just hope the dogs never find out that the pig is one step away from Beggin’ Strips. That’d definitely leave them conflicted.

I often spend my days sitting down pondering what it would look like for a ladybug to get it hit from the back. And now, thanks to this YouTube upload titled ‘A ladybird taking anal,’ I now know. Gee, thanks, Internet.

I respect how that male ladybug really got after ]]>

I often spend my days sitting down pondering what it would look like for a ladybug to get it hit from the back. And now, thanks to this YouTube upload titled ‘A ladybird taking anal,’ I now know. Gee, thanks, Internet.

I respect how that male ladybug really got after it, working his little bug legs harder than a million days of bug squats and bug cardio. If that recipient ladybug weren’t so indifferent to the act, I bet there’d have been a high five at the end, for sure.

When looking for a place to park your cow, look no further than the nearest bike rack. I guess that’s a thing?

Trying to get milk from a bike chain would probably yield less desirable or adorable results.

I’ll just leave my cow ]]>

When looking for a place to park your cow, look no further than the nearest bike rack. I guess that’s a thing?

Trying to get milk from a bike chain would probably yield less desirable or adorable results.

I’ll just leave my cow here. [Reddit]

In this clip, a cat goes hard to a remix of David Guetta’s “Who’s That Chick.” It’s more entertaining than you’d think. But either way, Dubstep Cat cares not for your societal rules or judgments.

By the way, the original YouTube upload of this is titled ‘Cat ]]>

In this clip, a cat goes hard to a remix of David Guetta’s “Who’s That Chick.” It’s more entertaining than you’d think. But either way, Dubstep Cat cares not for your societal rules or judgments.

By the way, the original YouTube upload of this is titled ‘Cat After Party.’ If that’s the after party, I don’t want to see what this cat does for the main party. Litter box moshing and intravenous cat nip are probably just the tip of the iceberg.

A couple of penguins named Pete and Penny flew on a Delta flight going from Atlanta to New York to do some PR work for their new Discover Channel documentary series Frozen Planet. Somehow, they ended up flying in the cabin of the plane. AND IT IS ]]>

A couple of penguins named Pete and Penny flew on a Delta flight going from Atlanta to New York to do some PR work for their new Discover Channel documentary series Frozen Planet. Somehow, they ended up flying in the cabin of the plane. AND IT IS ADORABLE.

I would not be mad in the slightest if Samuel L. Jackson saw this and made Penguins on a Plane as a sequel to Snakes on a Plane. Only, instead of having to kill them to save the plane, he just sits on the floor and scratches them under their chins and goes, “Aww, ain’t y’all some cute mofuckas.” Two hours well spent, I’d say.

This is a picture, via @ReporterLeslie, of a goat enjoying a slice of NYC pizza. It happened in the restaurant as though it were a normal thing. It is not.

Typical goat, going to La Famiglia instead of an authentic NYC pizza place. ]]>

This is a picture, via @ReporterLeslie, of a goat enjoying a slice of NYC pizza. It happened in the restaurant as though it were a normal thing. It is not.

Typical goat, going to La Famiglia instead of an authentic NYC pizza place. What, was the line at Sbarro’s too long? These goats…so unenlightened.

Goat Eating Pizza in Midtown [Buzzfeed]

Your afternoon palate cleanser involves a guy thinking his roommates are stealing his food, only for the background of the video to reveal things are not what they seem.Spoiler Alert: Squirrels are the most adorable criminals on Earth. Adorable criminals who can bite you and give you ]]>

Your afternoon palate cleanser involves a guy thinking his roommates are stealing his food, only for the background of the video to reveal things are not what they seem.Spoiler Alert: Squirrels are the most adorable criminals on Earth. Adorable criminals who can bite you and give you rabies or other unpleasant non-Rescue Rangers diseases, but still.

I have no clue who Johnny Neon is and have never come within a twenty mile radius of hearing his song “Hearts.” But all I know is that he had a dog going on an adventure in his music video for the song and it brings me much joy. ]]>

I have no clue who Johnny Neon is and have never come within a twenty mile radius of hearing his song “Hearts.” But all I know is that he had a dog going on an adventure in his music video for the song and it brings me much joy. Between this dog music video, with forcible camerawork conducted by a South African pooch named Lemon, and the dog from The Artist getting onstage for the Best Picture Academy Award, this is shaping up to be the year that dogs finally chip in a bit in the artistic community.