You can see the rest of the photos of Miley with the penis cake at TMZ. Spoiler alert: She really gets into it.

Between this cake and the penis-shaped Hannah Montana gummy candy, there’s no denying that Miley has the market cornered on delicious penis desserts and sweets. You earned it, kid.

But a rep for the school, when asked by TMZ, denies Grey was ever there, telling the gossip site, “We have several celebrities who read to our students each year. [Sasha Grey] was not present.”

The school’s denials come on the heels of parents expressing anger at Grey being allowed into the school.

Grey is by all accounts a decent person who just happened to have a porn career — which Grey stopped two years ago. Frankly, if I’m a parent in Compton, I’d imagine I should have far bigger concerns.

But in fairness, I can see how the parents would be disgusted. The type of culture-ruining tripe she’s starred in should be a societal scarlet letter. Kids shouldn’t look up to the kind of acting work she’s done. Oh, not the porns like I Wanna Bang Your Sister or No Swallowing Allowed 13. I meant Entourage.

PORN LEGEND SASHA GREY Reads to 1st Graders, School Attempts Cover-Up [TMZ]

Lovato tweeted the photo above, saying:

I’ve been working so hard to get healthy and fit.. I can’t believe I’m about to do this but I’m so excited.. Here’s my bikini time body!

I never thought I’d ever feel confident enough to ever to that. I’m excited how far I’ve come since being completely ashamed of my body..

I want any girl/guy out there who struggles with body image or confidence to know that it IS possible to find peace with yourself.

It hasn’t been easy, but it starts with a commitment to yourself.. Your mind.. And your soul. And trust me, I’m still working at it!! Haha

Some critics are calling the Lovato Twitter bikini pics a misstep and questioning how this helps her process of becoming comfortable with who she is.

Personally, I say good for her. I mean yes, the pig in me says that more 18-year-old girls should fight for happiness with their bodies by tweeting amateur iPhone pics of themselves in a bikini for millions to see. But the girl, misguided or not, is seizing the opportunity to broadcast her own message rather than have the “EXCLUSIVE FIRST HOT BIKINI PHOTOS OF DEMI LOVATO OUT OF REHAB” headline coming from some shady photo agency. And it’s a hot 18-year-old Disney starlet tweeting bikini photos of herself. So clearly there’s something here for everyone.

Any other 18-year-old girls in crisis can feel free to send their bikini photos to our tips email at the right. We’ll have counselors available 24/7 to help you through your problems by sending back emails such as, “You look good, baby. Just drop the shoulder strap” and “OMFG ghhghfrjekek”. The latter is an indigenous way of saying, “You are beautiful both inside and out,” so please interpret it as such. Thank you.

Demi Lovato Tweets Revealing Bikini Pic Of Herself [Radar Online]

“This will be the 12th season [of "The Apprentice and its spin-offs]. I love Celebrity Apprentice. We’ve raised tens of millions. I’ve decided we are going to continue on with the Celebrity Apprentice. I will not be running for president.”

The statement from Trump comes one day after NBC announced that, should Trump run for President, he would be replaced on “Celebrity Apprentice” and the show would continue on as scheduled.

This is truly a tragedy for all of mankind. Not because Trump necessarily would have done anything so amazing for us, but because there could have been all sorts of jokes made by Jay Leno about wanting to see his hair’s birth certificate, followed by Jay looking at the audience and going, “Eh? EH?” A big loss for all of mankind, indeed.

UPDATE: Trump’s full statement is below. Make note of the fact that he says that, obviously, he would have won easily if he had tried, but he doesn’t really feel like trying, so it’s really all your loss. It’s official: Donald Trump is me in high school.

After considerable deliberation and reflection, I have decided not to pursue the office of the Presidency. This decision does not come easily or without regret; especially when my potential candidacy continues to be validated by ranking at the top of the Republican contenders in polls across the country. I maintain the strong conviction that if I were to run, I would be able to win the primary and ultimately, the general election. I have spent the past several months unofficially campaigning and recognize that running for public office cannot be done half heartedly. Ultimately, however, business is my greatest passion and I am not ready to leave the private sector.

I want to personally thank the millions of Americans who have joined the various Trump grassroots movements and written me letters and e-mails encouraging me to run. My gratitude for your faith and trust in me could never be expressed properly in words. So, I make you this promise: that I will continue to voice my opinions loudly and help to shape our politician’s thoughts. My ability to bring important economic and foreign policy issues to the forefront of the national dialogue is perhaps my greatest asset and one of the most valuable services I can provide to this country. I will continue to push our President and the country’s policy makers to address the dire challenges arising from our unsustainable debt structure and increasing lack of global competitiveness. Issues, including getting tough on China and other countries that are methodically and systematically taking advantage of the United States, were seldom mentioned before I brought them to the forefront of the country’s conversation. They are now being debated vigorously. I will also continue to push for job creation, an initiative that should be this country’s top priority and something that I know a lot about. I will not shy away from expressing the opinions that so many of you share yet don’t have a medium through which to articulate.

I look forward to supporting the candidate who is the most qualified to help us tackle our country’s most important issues and am hopeful that, when this person emerges, he or she will have the courage to take on the challenges of the Office and be the agent of change that this country so desperately needs.

Thank you and God Bless America!

Donald Trump: I will not run for president [EW.com]

That seems like a pretty fantastic gig. Getting flown all over the country, making nice chunks of money, all for saying “CHA-CHING” may not be the best usage of one’s talent, but there are definitely worse ways to have an awesome life. At the same time, having people yell “CHA-CHING” at you all the time could be annoying. Plus hearing people mutter under their breath things like “That’s that CHA-CHING guy” sounds vaguely like you having a penchant for punching women in the back of the head during intercourse, yelling “CHA-CHING!” and then throwing change at their prone bodies. But hey, if someone wants to pay me for doing that too and hand me the key to the city, all good, man. Been doing it for free for years.

Watch a 1991 Local News Report About Seth Green, Burger-Ad Celebrity [Vulture]

Obviously Tommy Lee relates to the plight of the whales and their getting jerked off due to the fact that his penis size is not dissimilar from that of a blue whale. SeaWorld’s bizarre masturbation practices are basically oversized penis discrimination. Tommy Lee, the whales, and I should all start a support group. That is if we can all stop passing out from losing blood to our massive erections. I’d go on, but I’m feeling a little light-headed already.

Tommy Lee Explodes Over Whale Sperm [TMZ]

When asked about this, she told popeater.com: “Kourtney used to torture me and think I was odd because I had big boobs. I was 11 when I got my period and I started developing. I would sit in the bathtub, take a washcloth, put it under really hot water and put it against my boobs and pray to God, please don’t make my boobs grow any bigger. And Kourtney would be like, “Your boobs are so big and ugly!” She was so mean and then I would have to wear a bra and she would say, “Who wears a bra? That’s so disgusting.” It was so embarrassing.”

Kim Kardashian Begs God: ‘Please Don’t Make My Boobs Grow Any Bigger’ [Radar Online]

So, this is her way of showing everyone “who never thought she could”? If this is your way of proving the doubters wrong, you may want to go back to the drawing board. There have been more authoritative life-affirming performances by the guys getting stacked up in the nude at Abu Ghraib. At least when they were forced to blow each other, they had more pleasant noises coming out of their mouths.

Julio Bazan, 49, told The Post that Oprah was sitting in her limo in front the Soho House hotel Sunday night when he approached her.

The billionaire TV queen said she had no money and showed him her empty purse, he said.

The hustler said he then joked, “Hey, Oprah, why is it good to date a homeless man? [Because] when you’re finished, you can drop him off anywhere.”

“She laughed,” Bazan said — and then gave him five $20 bills through the window.

I charmed Oprah out of a C-note [NY Post]

The pop star looks picture perfect on the November issue’s cover, with a dewy complexion, rosy cheeks, pink pout and darkly rimmed eyes.

Todateen Star addressed the Photoshop accusations in a denial to the Huffington Post, which translated it from Portuguese.

“We could not help noticing your comments and tweets from the picture of Justin on the [magazine's] cover,” the statement read. “We would like to say that there was no change made in the area of the singer’s eyes.”

“We also want to say that all of us find Justin very naturally beautiful,” the statement added. “We’d never think it necessary to alter pictures of him. Natural beauty says it all, right?”

That’s not Photoshopped?! Todateen Star mag denies alteration of Justin Bieber’s cover photo [NY Daily News]

How brave of him. Nothing supports a social cause better than being willing to take one in the pooper. At least that’s what I tell people at charity events. What can I say, I’m socially aware.

She once called Karl Lagerfeld a ‘miserable little man’ and described Kate Moss as looking ‘as boring as hell’.

But in recent years singer Beth Ditto has embraced the fashion world with her own range for Evans and a new friend in Moss. So perhaps it was only a matter of time before she hit the catwalk.

And unlike the usual ‘plus-sized models’ – who are size 14 or 16 – Beth is around a size 28.

Now that’s a plus-sized model! Size 28 Beth Ditto takes to the catwalk at Paris Fashion Week [Daily Mail]

Bieber was in town to do a concert at the Maryland State Fair on Sunday. The incident in question happened outside Bieber’s trailer and the troopers were there for crowd control among issues of potential rioting from the thousands of female fans in attendance.

The police spokesperson told the media that it was “inappropriate behavior” but that Bieber will not be charged with any crime.

I don’t really have anything against Justin Bieber, but I’m not too happy that the police are letting this one slide. If an average Joe threw water balloons at a cop, I sincerely doubt the police would scruff his stupid shaggy hair and say, “On your way, you scamp.” Plus the concept of a 50-state manhunt for Justin Bieber for throwing water balloons on a state trooper whom had the apex of career come working crowd control at a Justin Bieber concert really appeals to my refined sensibilities. I’m not in favor of police violence, but the law is the law for a reason, “Outlaw” Justin Bieber.

Police: Bieber Hit Md. Troopers With Water Balloons [WBAL]

Jerry Lewis is hopping mad, lashing out at troubled actress Lindsay Lohan in a shocking tirade.

“I would smack her in the mouth. I’d smack her in the mouth if I saw her,” said Lewis.

“I would say ‘you deserve this and nothing else. Whack! And then if she’s not satisfied, I’d put her over my knee and spank her,” said Lewis.

Lewis said, “The same thing with Paris Hilton. Those children are begging for help. What they’re doing is saying I’m (expletive deleted) up. Can you help me?”

Jerry Lewis Speaks Out Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton [Inside Edition]

Cera recalls how the fan, who had been smoking, approached him and said, “You look just like my fiance. Can I give you a hug?” She embraced the actor before he had a chance to answer but he recoiled in horror when she then asked, “Can I suck your d**k?”

He tells Rolling Stone magazine, “I pulled away from her. And the cigarette smoke was just falling out of her mouth. It was such a scary image. And then I saw her pull her shirt down for some other guy. There was something demonic and terrifying about it. She was completely crazy.”

And the meeting has made Cera all the more cautious when coming face-to-face with his admirers.

He adds, “All it did was make me put a few more bricks in the wall I already have.”

Cera Unsettled By Fame [Contact Music]

You have to give the kid some credit..he took that water bottle being thrown at him with a lot of class. If that happened to me, I’d have been kicking that teenage girl violently. I’ve kicked teenage girls in the ovaries for less (or more, depending upon how optimistic you are).

Justin Bieber’s head meets water bottle, makes Internet users giggle [Washington Post]

Too cool to let your freak flag fly? Then stay out of Jack White’s audience. The Dead Weather front man unleashed some breathtakingly funny abuse on the star-studded but tight-assed crowd at Don Hill’s Wednesday night when they didn’t respond to the hot licks he and the band were laying down.

“F- you, you hip motherf-ers!” White screamed at the audience, which included Liv Tyler, rock royalty Alexandra Richards, Shaun White and Mary-Kate Olsen. “Why don’t you rock the f- out?! Maybe I should go grab those free drinks and shove them down your throats, you hip motherf-ers!”

Dead Weather front man Jack White blows up at ‘hip motherf-ers’ at concert [NYDN]

You know what’s great about really attractive women? How hilarious they all are! You can tell because guys laugh really hard at their jokes as if they saw Richard Pryor in 1976. Such comedic brilliance must be genuine and wouldn’t at all disappear after you sleep with one. No sir!

Montana starts talking at about 2:40 in. Her quotes, including “I have a lot of at-home experience” and “I know what I do and I do it well,” are fairly fantastic.

But overall, I don’t care a whole lot about Montana Fishburne (though I wouldn’t mind watching her shame her family on film). That said, this Brian Pumper character is someone I want to get to know. I don’t even care in what capacity, I just want to hear him talk more about life, love, and the pursuit of new jailbait for perverts. It’s the American dream.

“I kind of knew that we’re going to have sex, but I didn’t expect anything out of the ordinary…I did not expect to be sodomized,” she said.

Vogelhut says that after drinking some Brandy together Polanski gave her an MDMA — commonly known as Ecstasy — and told her: “It’s a really good drug. It will make you feel good, it will mellow you out. It’s like a stimulator.”

When they eventually made it to the bedroom, she says Polanski handcuffed her and raped her.

“He grabs me by the hair, jerks my head up, snaps amyl nitrate under my nose [which when inhaled has a psychoactive effect] and enters me anally,” Vogelhut recalled of the horrifying night. [transcribed from the video: "I did not expect to be entered this way. There was no foreplay, nothing. No kissing, no tenderness, nothing. I thought, maybe this is what they do in Hollywood."]

“I hurt. This was rape. I was anally raped repeatedly.”

Roman Polanski really liked butt sex [Filmdrunk]
EXCLUSIVE VIDEO INTERVIEW: ‘Roman Polanski Handcuffed, Drugged, & Raped Me,’ Charges New Victim [Radaronline]