Guyism » Cincinnati Bengals

Cincinnati Bengals player gets pot delivered to his house

A. Isaac — Thu, 22 Sep 2011 12:30:24 +0000

Two Cincinnati Bengals players, Jerome Simpson and Anthony Collins, were questioned by police after receiving a shipment of marijuana from California.

Inside the home police allegedly found six more pounds of marijuana, other empty parcels, scales and packaging material.

“The house was set up as a potential distribution network,” said Tommy LaNier, head of the National Marijuana Initiative, a group that is funded by the Office of National Drug Control Policy and helps coordinate marijuana enforcement operations around the United States.

“They had it all set up to receive supplies of high grade marijuana from Northern California and from there it was being distributed from that residence,” he said.

Despite receiving pot in a shipment and being in possession of six pounds of drugs in the house, “no arrests were made”. Man, I really need to brush up on these new laws. Must be for medicinal purposes.

NFL players suspected of transporting California pot [News 10]

Sports by the numbers: 12/15/10

A. Isaac — Wed, 15 Dec 2010 13:25:16 +0000

Guyism’s daily look at what’s hot in the world of sports.

Contrary to what Minnesota Vikings officials have been saying for days now, the Metrodome will not be ready for its last game of the 2010 campaign. The Vikings will instead use the University of Minnesota’s TCF Bank Stadium. Oddly enough, the Monday night affair comes exactly 29 years to the day that a game was last played outside in Minnesota.

Days after just missing an upset of the Michigan State Spartans, the Oakland Grizzlies upset the #7 ranked Tennessee Vols 89-82. The reigning Summit League champs are no slouches, they have a center named Keith Benson that is a legit college big man and may very well play in the NBA one day. The near misses for Oakland have been plentiful this year. They played both Purdue and Illinois tough in the first half before faltering late in the game. Tennessee, it seems, did not take them seriously enough. That, or, maybe the Vols were just a tad overrated themselves.

2-11

Don’t blame that 2-11 Bengals start on the players, it’s on the coaches says wide receiver Terrell Owens. Way to deflect the blame there T.O. I’m sure Carson Palmer’s repeated pick-sixes have little to do with that record. “Of course, we have to go out there and play the game. But in order for us to do what we’re allowed to do at the best of our abilities, the coaches have to put the players in the best position.” Yes, I think I speak for everybody when I say, shut up T.O.

750,000

The fall of Mark Prior has to be one of the more fascinating but sad stories in baseball over the last decade. At one point, people were saying Prior could one day win multiple Cy Young awards and possibly get into the Hall of Fame. But after he peaked in the 2001 season with an 18-6 record and an All-Star game appearance, things have gone south for him. The Yankees are giving him one last shot signing him to a minor-league contract yesterday. If Prior does indeed make the big leagues, he’s due to make 750k.

Sports by the numbers: 11/9/10

A. Isaac — Tue, 09 Nov 2010 14:03:26 +0000

Guyism’s daily look at what’s hot in the world of sports.

8,900,000

In what is sure to be great news for parents trying to keep their kids from the online poker craze, a college dropout named Jonathan Duhamel won the World Series of Poker yesterday. The Canadian pro has worked odd jobs for more than two 2 years after dropping out of college. His primary source of income? Online poker.

67-year old Joe Morgan and his broadcast partner Jon Miller were kicked to the curb by ESPN yesterday. Miller was well-liked by fans, Morgan, not so much. His regular assault against statistics-based analysis of baseball was at times, mind-numbing. In fact, one of the more popular sports blogs in the world (until they shut their doors) was none other than a site called firejoemorgan.com.

91.3

It appears the Lions will lose Matthew Stafford for the rest of the season after he suffered a Grade 3 separation of his right shoulder against the Jets. Although he is seeking a second opinion from Dr. James Andrews in Alabama, this injury is actually worse than the one he had earlier this season. Without Stafford, the Lions lose their marquee player and a quarterback who carries with him an impressive 91.3 rating in just his second season of action.

27-21

The Bengals season got more disappointing last night after they fell just short in their comeback attempt against the Pittsburgh Steelers. On 4th and 5 with 40 seconds remaining, Jordan Shipley appeared to have caught a pass for a first down inside the 5 yard line. That is, until, James Harrison knocked it loose with a bone-jarring and legal hit. Ocho Cinco’s prediction of a Super Bowl run for his Bengals is starting to look like, uh, pretty stupid.

The hits just keep on coming for Auburn quarterback and Heisman front-runner Cam Newton. Foxsports.com is reporting that while Newton attended Florida, he had three separate instances of cheating. Not only did he turn in a paper that wasn’t his, but Newton followed that up by purchasing one off the internet. Cecil Newton, Sr. declined to comment on the story.

Audio: Chad Ochocinco’s cereal has sex line number

A. Isaac — Thu, 30 Sep 2010 15:09:42 +0000

While we don’t normally consider ourselves connoisseurs of phone sex lines, we do give our resounding approval of this one.

If you haven’t heard already, Chad Ochocinco has a number on his breakfast cereal for a charity. Except the number directs you to a woman in a sexy voice asking you if you want her to spread eagle.

If you want to hear it yourself, call 1-800-HELP-FTC. However, we’ve done you a favor and recorded it. Because at Guyism, we care about your sexual health.

Parental discretion is advised.

TheDirty.com hit with $11 million dollar judgement for slandering Cincinnati Bengals cheerleader

A. Isaac — Thu, 26 Aug 2010 19:49:09 +0000

*Update*

To put it lightly, this is by far the dumbest mistake I’ve ever seen. Instead of TheDirty.com being sued, TheDirt.com was sued. TheDirty.com founder Hooman Karamian was never served in the case. TheDirt.com is owned by Los Angeles-based Dirty World Entertainment Recordings and who of course, had nothing to do with the libel.

WOW!

More at Barstool Sports

Calling TheDirty.com a gossip website would be a half truth. Calling it a haven for obnoxious, lewd and slanderous comments would be more appropriate.

For years, the site pushed the envelope in regards to posts about celebrities and athletes from their supposed “army”. Last year, they ran with a story (and I use the term “story” here loosely) about a Cincinnati Bengals cheerleader named Sarah who they said had an STD. Ignore for a moment that they had absolutely no proof and just read libelous statements.

THE DIRTY ARMY: Nik, here we have Sarah J, captain cheerleader of the playoff bound cinci bengals.. Most ppl see Sarah has a gorgeous cheerleader AND highschool teacher.. yes she’s also a teacher.. but what most of you don’t know is.. Her ex Nate.. cheated on her with over 50 girls in 4 yrs.. in that time he tested positive for Chlamydia Infection and Gonorrhea.. so im sure Sarah also has both.. whats worse is he brags about doing sarah in the gym.. football field.. her class room at the school she teaches at DIXIE Heights.

…this is Sara J, Cincinnati Bengal Cheerleader. She’s been spotted around town lately with the infamous Shayne Graham. She has also slept with every other Bengal Football player. This girl is a teacher too!!

So yea, here’s some advice to those of you out there who want to start a gossip site. First, try to write in somewhat coherent English and not some made up IM slang you created. Secondly, and shall I add, much more important than the first point–don’t accuse people of sleeping with 50 men and spreading venereal diseases.

Cedric Benson punched a bouncer

A. Isaac — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 19:43:18 +0000

There are two types of NFL players.

1) The ones who spend their off-season working out and preparing for the grueling upcoming schedule

and

2) Cedric Benson

Benson was arrested for fighting at an Austin club and ultimately punching a bouncer in the face.

According to the Austin police arrest affidavit, Benson was at Annie’s West bar in the Sixth Street entertainment district on May 30 when he got into an altercation with another patron that left him spitting blood from a cut lip. After staff intervened, witnesses told police Benson shoved a bar worker and was verbally abusive. After being asked to leave, Benson was escorted to the door.
Bar employee Bryan White told police that once outside, Benson complained that “all these white boys are ganging up on me and kicking me out,” then punched White in the face.

To his credit, Benson has been on good behavior since his arrests in 2008. And by that, I mean he hasn’t gotten sloppy drunk and fought with innocent bystanders or gotten behind the wheel. That in and of itself should get him some brownie points considering he is a Cincinnati Bengal.

Bengals RB Cedric Benson arrested in Texas {AP}

Larry Johnson signs with Cincinnati Bengals

A. Isaac — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 18:35:44 +0000

In a move all to familiar to Bengals fans, the team decided to take a chance on malcontent Larry Johnson. If this were the 1st time the Bengals took a flier on a guy with off-field problems, you probably wouldn’t think twice.

Amazingly though, the Bengals have a history of pulling these kinds of stunts.

(Chris Henry, Tank Johnson and Peter Warrick just to name a few.)

However, the Bengals probably have a more legitimate reason this time around to add LJ. Starting running back Cedric Benson tweaked a hip muscle in Sunday’s game and is questionable this week.

And even though Marvin Lewis has already told Johnson that he is the team’s 4th running back, you have to think with Benson hurt, they’ll give him a legitimate look this week.

As for Larry Johnson himself, he’s about 3 years past his prime. He’s been more productive on Twitter than he has been on the field.

Expect a meltdown about two weeks from now. In fact, you can bet on it.