This special on sex takes on a very interesting turn due to the enthusiastic work of the sign language translator in the bottom right corner of the screen. Take a look.

I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that it’s long been a dream of mine to date ]]>

This special on sex takes on a very interesting turn due to the enthusiastic work of the sign language translator in the bottom right corner of the screen. Take a look.

I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that it’s long been a dream of mine to date a deaf girl, and here’s why. Not only can I f her ears without any risk of damage, but I can also get her to put on performances like this all the while calling her a C by throwing my voice and she’ll be totally oblivious! And do you know how f’ing awesome a team we’ll be at charades? So yeah, I’m a pretty big activist for people with disabilities.

Just sit back and enjoy what life is like to be Helen Keller.

I’m going to go out on a limb and say that being blind and deaf doesn’t seem too desirable. But at least Helen Keller has carved out a cottage industry from it. Think about it, who ]]>

Just sit back and enjoy what life is like to be Helen Keller.

I’m going to go out on a limb and say that being blind and deaf doesn’t seem too desirable. But at least Helen Keller has carved out a cottage industry from it. Think about it, who else is there whom you could use in a punchline for a joke about being deaf AND blind? Most other famous blind people, like Stevie Wonder or Ray Charles, were given outstanding auditory abilities to balance out their blindness. And other deaf people can, um, make hand gestures to replace coherent words. Boy, those deafies really get the shaft in comparison, eh? Other than the fact that you could f their ear and they’d be totally unaffected. Not sure if that qualifies as a perk, though.

Everyone knows the dangers of kissing a woman…herpes, getting into a relationship, cooties…but now you can add another one to the list: Making her go deaf.

A young Chinese woman was left partially deaf following a passionate kiss from her boyfriend.

The 20-something from Zhuhai in ]]>

Everyone knows the dangers of kissing a woman…herpes, getting into a relationship, cooties…but now you can add another one to the list: Making her go deaf.

A young Chinese woman was left partially deaf following a passionate kiss from her boyfriend.

The 20-something from Zhuhai in Guangdong province arrived at hospital having completely lost the hearing in her left ear, said local reports.

“While kissing is normally very safe, doctors advise people to proceed with caution,” wrote the China Daily.

The doctor who treated the girl in hospital was quoted in the paper explaining what had happened.

“The kiss reduced the pressure in the mouth, pulled the eardrum out and caused the breakdown of the ear.”

The chorus of warnings was echoed by the Shanghai Daily, which wrote: “A strong kiss may cause an imbalance in the air pressure between two inner ears and lead to a broken ear drum.”

The young woman is expected to regain her full hearing within about two months.

It kind of sounds like Chinese propaganda to me but I guess we can pretend this is totally legit. What the f kind of sea monster do you have to be to suck so much air out of the girl (or blow so much air in) that she her ear drum explodes? You’re not supposed to kiss someone like you’re blowing up an innertube. In fact, there are rarely situations when sucking air out of or blowing air into an orifice will lead to anything good.

Ironically for me, when I kiss a girl, I often get a lot of ear pain afterwards. Usually from her prattling on about shoes or our future together or why is her vagina burning so badly and was I recently tested. You know, usual relationship nonsense.

[source]