Children crying over stupid things: Always funny. Yes, kids, your lives are forever ruined now that you’re not going to eat stale candy corn some pederast put in your pumpkin bucket after scratching his ass. There are people unemployed and unable to afford living in their homes but your plight of being unable to eat a bite-sized Twix is of the utmost importance. Damn selfish kids.

Jimmy Kimmel Makes Kids Cry Over Halloween Candy [Viral Viral Videos]

Could have used more homoerotic shirtless beach volleyball, but I guess that’s just not feasible. Apparently it’s not “socially acceptable” to “tie strings to babies’ arms and make them move like puppets.” Whatever, society.

Policitally correct? Not really. Hot? Definitely.

We’re back with another set of sexy female celebrities in their Halloween costumes to complete our roundup for the day. All in all it seems that celeb babes didn’t really have their creative thinking caps on, but it wasn’t a total loss. The highlight (as it is pretty much every day) of this set has to be Courtney Stodden and her husband Doug Hutchinson (he’s dressed up as Courtney in case you can’t figure it out — nightmare fuel for weeks there). Sophie Tuner (pictured above) seemed to get in the right spirit, but the rest of the ladies just didn’t do much for me. Maybe you’ll enjoy them more than I did though. In order below: Emmanuelle Chriqui, Miranda Cosgrove, Zooey Deschanel, Holly Madison, Snooki, Gwen Stefani, Sophie Turner, Courtney and Doug, Paz de la Huerta, Bridget Marquardt, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Paris Hilton, Jessica Alba, and Kelly Brook in the saddest Halloween costume ever.

I’m simultaneously enamored and disgusted with the actors’ commitment to their characters. On the one hand, I kind of wanted to see them help her out. On the other hand, I wanted to see them attempt to eat her flesh. They did neither. Maybe I expect too much out of guys whose career peaked with the TV credit of “Guy at Haunted House Dressed Like Zombie Who Copped a Feel on Local News Reporter under the Guise of Helping Her Up,” but still.

[Thanks for the tip, Comedy Wizard!]

The following are the games that best encapsulates what Halloween is all about; a few are fairly accessible (and should already be in your library already, quite honestly). While other are treasures ready to be tracked down by whatever means necessary. Translation: time to head to eBay once again…

10. Left 4 Dead
What happens when you take Valve’s penchant for crafting finely tuned first person shooting, and make it more of a stumbling around in the dark experience? One in which strength in numbers, not just simply guns a blazin’, will help come with a never ending wave of zombies? Why, one of the best reasons to crack open Steam later this evening; either part one or two will do…

9. Fatal Frame
Basically, you’re a ghost hunter, but instead of relying upon a proton pack and the like, your only weapon is a camera that takes pictures of ghastly specters, which ultimately dishes damage to them as well. There’s been four installments thus far, and the best one unfortunately has never made it here. That being the fourth entry in the series, for the Wii, which also adds a flashlight into the mix, to burn ghost up in a fashion similar to Alan Wake. Otherwise, go for part three on the PS2 if you can track a copy down…

8. Dead Space
For those who love stumbling around dark corridors in outer space, as well as fighting off gruesome space zombies and other forms of otherworldly mutations, one can’t go wrong with EA’s ode to Alien. Again, both parts one and two are excellent, but I’d start with the first one if at all possible…

7. Dementium
Wait, a portable game? How scary or creepy can a DS title be? You’d be surprised! The plot makes zero sense, but it hardly matters. Just know that you’re some dude, trapped in a hospital inhabited by zombies and other bloodthirsty creatures, all coming after you. Thankfully there’s an abundance of handguns and shotguns littered about. Of the two, I’d say go with the sequel, since it’s a bit longer and more refined…

6. Dead Rising
Who doesn’t like Dawn of the Dead, right? That’s what the first Dead Rising is essentially; beating the crap out of zombies at a mall! Unfortunately, the needlessly rigid structure makes the game a chore to slog through, hence why the sequel is the better option. Not the first one though, staring some motocross guy and his sick daughter. Instead, go for the recently releases remixed version; aside from the far superior Frank West as the lead once again, there’s a sand box mode in which no time limits or other constraints to get in the way…

5. Night Trap
Believe it or not, this crappy Full Motion Video game that’s molded after classic, cheesy horror flicks from the 80s, and starring the now dearly departed/dead as a doornail 80s sitcom star Dana Plato, was all the rage among pissed off pissed off parents and law makers. Oh the world of video games controversy, before Grand Theft Auto. Also, good lucky tracking down a copy!

4. Haunting Ground
On a similar note, the best horror part of horror flicks is one in which some damsel in distress is running around, terrified out of her wits. Preferably with huge breasts. So imagine an entire game based upon such a scenario! You can’t fight back, just run away, with the goal being, aside from not getting caught, not going insane due to fright. Though along the way you befriend a dog who not only protects you, but helps to solve puzzles. So there’s actually a decent game underneath all the goofy t&a…

3. Silent Hill
One of the hallmarks of survival horror genre. Not much to say here; virtually everyone should be familiar with the series. There’s been countless entries, but only two are definite must plays. Part two is still absolutely amazing, a must for any seasoned gamer. Though the recently released Shattered Memories for the Wii is also pretty damn good, which retells the first game in a manner that will seriously send chills down your spine…

2. Resident Evil
Okay, time for the undisputed king of the genre. Again, I have absolutely nothing to say here, since pretty much everyone has played a Resident Evil game, and most of them are actually quite good (well, the primary entries at least). While most will agree that RE4 is the best one, I say give RE2 a replay later this tonight, since it sticks closest to its inspiration (hell, they even got George Romero to direct the commercial), has you blasting away actual zombies instead of crazed villagers in Spain, and also introduces Clair Redfield, by far my favorite video game hottie of them all…

1. Illbleed
Huh? Yeah, there’s a good chance you’ve never heard of this game before. It was released in the tail end of the Dreamcast’s life, about ten years ago, but still remains, the best pound for pound “haunted house adventure” ever crafted for a video game (and the only to this day, as far as I can tell). Whether it be the insane amount of blood that gushes from your body if an enemy so much as breathes on you, or the “cake from hell”, plus EVERYTHING in between, it honestly doesn’t get any better than this…

The study also notes that the decline in deliveries applied not just to scheduled procedures like caesarean and induced births, but also to natural birthing.

Lead researcher Rebecca Levy told the Telegraph that soon-to-be mothers may be inducing their hormones to control birth timing since Halloween “evokes fear on some level.”

Conversely, births on Valentine’s Day rise by 5% when compared to the weeks on either side of the holiday.

I don’t blame a mother for not wanting to pop a kid out on Halloween. You don’t want a Rosemary’s Baby or, even worse, Courtney Stodden popping out.

Let’s keep the spirit of the holiday in mind, people. Halloween is a day for things to be recklessly entering scantily clad women’s vaginas, not leaving them. It’s about time women’s hormones do us a favor.

Pregnant women ‘time births to avoid Halloween’ [Telegraph]

First we have a brand new trailer for the upcoming Lollipop Chainsaw, christened just for Halloween, since today’s all about zombies and junk like that. Some might recall my eh, whatever attitude upon first glance, but I might have to change my mode of thinking, now that actual gameplay is on display. Sure it’s still ultra pandering, but jumping around and swinging around chainsaws does look hella fun…

Next is an upcoming fighting game that I’ve been meaning to mention for some time now: Skullgirls. It’s entirely new kind of fighting game, created a prominent tournament fighter, who has decided to channel his notions of fighting game should be. Personally, that somewhat sounds like hell; one of the main reasons why I can’t get into virtual beat fests is how ultra complicated they are. And hence why the footage below, from a PlayStation blog post on the game, which demonstrates its mechanics, is both scary and confusing. But I know I’m in the minority, plus I’ll still be getting it anyway, for its beautifully animated all girls cast…

And finally, remember Robin Williams’ hottie offspring? Well her and her old man are back in yet another Zelda commercial, for Skyward Sword. This will no doubt be showing up in every other region, though for whatever reason, Greece has first dibs. And for whatever other reason, I am still obsessed with Zelda Williams. Actually, I know why; she’s cute as a button and hot as hell. I think her shorts (or skirt, can’t tell) is what really does it for me this time…

At least until some guy invents a way for them to eat, which just happened.

Oh, this just can’t be any good. Happy Halloween nightmares!

Mohsen Shahinpoor has invented the first robotic Venus flytrap. OK, so it doesn’t currently actually have the power to eat the bug; instead it has a series of sensors that imitate the fine hairs you see on the actual plant, and slam closed on the bug, securely trapping it.

Unfortunately, the “digestion” part of this particular nightmare equation has already been invented: Robotic Technology, Inc. has been developing the Energy Autonomous Tactical Robot (yes, they actually called it “EATR”) since 2003. Of course, RTI insists that their robot is entirely vegetarian and can in no way be converted to eat flesh like a steel predator roaming the streets, eating random pedestrians and possibly laughing evilly with glowing eyes.

Thanks, Mohsen. Thanks a lot. We’re sure the robots will thank you too when the revolution comes and they eat you last.

Robotic Venus Flytrap Eats Bugs to Generate Power [DVICE]

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Halloween is officially today, but with it falling on a Monday many sexy female celebrities already got their costume on for some party time. The highlights so far have to be Kate Upton as a bottle of Tabasco and Heidi Klum just freaking the f*ck out of us. I’m sure there will be much more to report tomorrow, that’s why I am calling this “volume one.” So far the costumes as a whole have been a bit disappointing, but maybe they’ll really bring out the big guns later today.

In order below: Coco and Ice-T, Kim Kardashian, Heidi Klum, AnnaLynne McCord, Rose McGowan, Melissa Rycroft, Kate Upton, Jayde Nicole, JWoww, Petra Ecclestone, and AJ and Aly Michalka, and Cameron Diaz in a badass Joker mask..

Since we crank out so many stories each week some really good ones get lost in the cracks. And since so many new people visit Guyism every day (thank you), we thought we’d take some time on the weekends to share a few classics that many of our newer readers may have missed.

Halloween specials are a long-standing trope of the classic sitcom. While lesser shows may simply resort to crummy costumes and stereotypical spooky plotlines, others go all out to ensure that their Halloween specials are some of the most creative and memorable episodes of the entire show’s run. Of all the TV shows to ever air, here are the ten that had the best Halloween specials.

10 ‘How I Met Your Mother’
How I Met Your Mother has only had one full-fledged Halloween special, but it was a doozy. Titled Slutty Pumpkin, the special aired during the show’s first season and brilliantly lampoons the mother of all Halloween specials – It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. Instead of staying up to validate the existence of the Great Pumpkin, however, Ted sits atop his roof annually hoping to get another glimpse of the Slutty Pumpkin – a girl he met in that location years earlier. Add in Barney’s revolving door of costumes and a bunch of great one-liners, and this is easily one of the best Halloween specials in recent years.

9 ‘Scooby Doo’
Pretty much every episode of Scooby Doo could easily air on Halloween. However, the show has done a number of Halloween-specific episodes over the year. Of them all, the classic one we all grew up on is the Headless Horseman of Halloween (first aired in 1976). The episode starts out innocently enough with the gang heading out for a good time at a normal Halloween party. However, the headless horseman shows up to ruin the festivities…with traditional Scooby Doo hi-jinks to ensue. The episode is also one of the first appearances of Scooby-Dum – Scooby Doo’s dumber, inbred cousin.

8 ‘Saved by the Bell’
Among all the memorable Saved by the Bell episodes, the Mystery Weekend episode has always stood out in my mind. Part of this is likely because it takes place wholly outside of Bayside High – revolving instead around a theatre-type murder mystery at an old-timey mansion. In classic Clue form, hidden passageways, disappearing guests and a big “murder” reveal at the end all add up to a particularly campy whodunit.

7 ‘The Office’
So far, The Office has graced its audience with three different Halloween specials (a fourth airs this week). The great thing about all of them is that the show’s writers use the holiday as a complement to more traditional storylines – a fact that helps make The Office Halloween specials some of the most realistic and relatable. For example, in the show’s first Halloween special (Halloween, 2005), the episode revolves around Michael struggling to fire someone and Jim and Pam’s still-budding romance. Add in classic costumes like Two-Headed Michael Scott and Three-Hole Punch Jim, and The Office is a great place to spend your October holiday.

6 ‘The Adventures of Pete and Pete’
In its short run, The Adventures of Pete and Pete only managed to produce one Halloween special (dubbed Halloweenie). However, the episode serves as a classic example of the show’s quirky amazing-ness. Though the episode starts out with two wholly different storylines – Little Pete wants to break the trick-or-treating record for most houses visited and Big Pete fears being terrorized by the “Pumpkin Eters” (yes, Eters) teen gang – they eventually intersect to create a completely unique and satisfying conclusion.

5 ‘Beavis and Butthead’
We have the epically titled Beavis and Butthead episode Butt-o-ween to thank for the introduction of Beavis’ Great Bungholio. After stealing candy from some kids who come their door, the two decide to go trick-or-treating themselves. After ingesting way too much candy, Beavis’ sugar rush transforms him into his oft-quoted alter ego.

4 ‘South Park’
Every time South Park chooses to do a Halloween special, they succeed in typical hilarious fashion. Whether it’s a bottle of Worcester sauce causing a zombie invasion or a classic Scooby-Doo-inspired visit from the band Korn, the show’s Halloween episodes are easily some of its best. Of course, put Cartman in a Hitler costume and Stan in a Raggedy Andy costume, and you’ve got a whole lot of icing on the cake.

3 ‘Home Improvement’
Home Improvement is a sitcom that doesn’t really stand up to the tests of time. However, during the 1990s is was a ratings juggernaut that committed to doing a full-fledged Halloween episode every single season. For this commitment to the holiday, we must take a moment to honor the Taylors and their annual attempt to outdo each other in terms of costumes and home decorations.

2 ‘Roseanne’
Ever year, the Connors went all out on Halloween to deliver a truly memorable holiday special. Despite their perennially empty pocket books, the family always managed to pool enough money together to dress up in epic costumes and deck their home out in true haunted house fashion. Much like The Office, the pranks and plots in the episodes didn’t seem contrived or out of character for the Connor family. Of course, seeing Dan chase after Roseanne with a revving chainsaw is always a good time.

1 ‘The Simpsons’
When it comes to a number one for this list, there really is no show that comes close to The Simpsons. For over twenty years, The Simpsons’ Treehouse of Horror has become an institution of global television. While there are far too many classic moments to list here, a few that spring to mind include the Evil Krusty Doll, The Shinning, 3D Homer and Homer selling his soul to Devil Ned for a donut.

Halloween is supposed to be a children’s holiday, but the debauchery that comes along with the occasion caters to that ornery Peter Pan inside everyone over the age of eighteen. As children we indulged on candy, and as we aged those pieces of candy corn turned into triangular shaped shots of Southern Comfort. Similarly, costumes morphed from superhero-inspired and cute to outright lewd. There is no better example of this than the attire women drape over their buxom bodies on All Hallows Eve. Halloween is really just the Slutty Super Bowl to the female species. But what do these costumes actually say about the wearer?

8 Naughty School Girl
Fact: Every girl has worn this outfit, whether on Halloween or while pretending to be Britney Spears.

What it says about them: A woman who wears this outfit out on Halloween is politely telling the world that she’s not a regular student, but that she’s a “naughty” one. You know what naughty girls need: to be spanked. You know what kind of guy is into spanking: a perverted one. You’ve just announced to the world thanks to your costume that you’re hoping to have a real, middle-aged math teacher come up to you and ask about the circumference of your mouth.

7 Cowgirl
Fact: A normal cowgirl’s work involves shoveling shit and slaughtering animals.

What it says about them: Girls who dress up like cowgirls have definitely ridden a mechanical bull in their lifetime. As girls tend to have a rule of three when it comes to sexual partners (number they tell you x 3) when it comes to mechanical bull riders/cowgirls… you automatically add 50 people to that list. They spread their legs like card tables.

6 Playboy Bunny
Fact: Guys will still sleep with a cute girl if she has a real tail.

What it says about them: Halloween is a night when a person can be anything other than what they really are. Choices range from heroic to iconic, yet this chick has decided to be a nude model. Really? You understand that every girl Halloween costume can have “slutty” in front of it, and of those you chose to be a “slutty” slut. Hmmm, someone takes trick or treating to a whole new level.

5 Fairy
Fact: If you clap your hands loud enough, a stripper named Tinker Balls will show up at your house.

What it says about them: A girl who dresses up as a fairy has less creativity than the creepy white guy who wears regular clothes on Halloween and tells people that he’s dressed up as a serial killer. In fact, the only thing the girl has done is taken her pre-pubescent sister’s spandex dress and paired it with some wings. The result is the Pet Rock of the costumed community.

4 Maid
Fact: Mrs. Garrett from Diff’rent Strokes made you feel funny down there.

What it says about them: Once again, this is a night to be absolutely ANYTHING, and you’ve chosen to be a person who cleans toilets and knows exactly how to fold a fitted bed sheet. All those feminists didn’t burn their bras so that twenty-something women would parade around as second-class citizens with subservient costumes. But if a girl is hell-bent on polishing things, I’m sure there are tons of guys willing to present their knobs.

3 Nurse
Fact: Any girl who dresses up as a nurse should be prepared to answer questions about erections lasting for more than four hours.

What it says about them: A naughty nurse is the first adjective/noun combination thrown out there when pockmarked porn directors are trying to break the plot in their next film entitled, Big Trouble in Little Vagina. All Halloween costumes come with a certain amount of sluttyness, nurse costumes come with a certain amount of beef injections.

2 Sex and the City (ensemble)
Fact: The ugly girl in the crew is expected to don a wig and be the fire crotch, Miranda.

What it says about them: Themed costumes can be fun and clever, but this has been done to death. May we offer a slightly more unique angle to take when dressing up: Human Centipede and the City. I’d pay money to see a bunch of girls walking ass to mouth in a Manolo Blahniks, as the lead dog downs Cosmo’s to feed the rest of the socialites. Now that’s pizzazz.

1 Sarah Palin
Fact: Who’s Nailin’ Paylin was a more serious work than Sarah Palin’s Alaska.

What it says about them: First, are we sure we can’t add Sarah Palin to the aforementioned butt brigade? No? Fine. A woman who dresses up as Sarah Palin definitely has moxie, as she’s going to spend the whole night being cat-called by guys who have literally put their dicks in boxes. The costume is one of the few female ensembles where you actually put on clothes to pull it off, which makes it that much better as a guy when you get them off and put your Dick Cheney in her George W. Bush.

Halloween is just a few short days away, so if you don’t have a costume, it’s about time you got on top of it. Last year we brought you tasteless costume ideas for 2010. Well, a lot of shit has gone down since then, so here’s a new batch of topical costumes that you can consider sporting this year.

10 Casey “Party Girl” Anthony
This is probably going to be one of the more popular costumes around this year for girls. It allows girls to dress slutty without people questioning exactly why they’re dressed slutty… plus if you’re like Casey, your Halloween night will end with you getting off. Make sure to leave your kid at home that night though because you want it to be authentic.

9 Chris “Meltdown” Brown
This is the perfect costume for that guy you know who loves to get into fights whenever he goes out drinking. All he has to do is bleach his hair, tear off his shirt for no real reason, and throw a bunch of tantrums throughout the night. Backhanding his girlfriend is optional.

8 Courtney Stodden
Ladies, you love to dress up skanky on Halloween. So why not dress up like the ultimate skank? Put on the tightest fitting dress you can find and spend about three days before injecting collagen into your lips. The drunker you get on Halloween, the better… since incoherence seems to be Courtney’s specialty. Remember to only flirt with men who are at least 35 years older than you.

7 Charlie Sheen
It’s true that the Charlie Sheen wow factor has fizzled out quite a bit, but this is Halloween! Dressing up as Sheen will allow you to snort a bunch of cocaine and get ridiculously drunk… which probably isn’t too different than most Halloweens, but it beats having to do it dressed as Gumby.

6 Marcus “In the Closet” Bachmann
The Sarah Palin costume is played out. If you really want to go with a political theme, have your girlfriend dress up as Michelle Bachmann so you can go as her husband, Marcus. Just make sure you build a portable closet around you since that guy is clearly always in one.

5 Christina “The Pudge” Aguilera
Fat girls, now’s the time to dress up like your favorite pop star and not have people give you a hard time for it! Thanks to Aguilera’s recent diet of Big Macs and Slurpees, people will actually believe you when you dress up as her this year.

4 Anthony Weiner’s Weiner
Chances are, people tell you you’re a dick anyway. Why not go as one of the most popular dicks of 2011?! … next to Mel Gibson, of course. You can pretty much wear some boxer briefs over your head to officially become the infamous “bulge”. Toss on a politician-style suit and you’re good to go.

3 Chaz Bono – A Couple Costume
This is the perfect couples costume for 2011. Ditch the cheesy, overdone Plug and Socket idea and instead hit your Halloween party as everyone’s favorite transgender contestant from Dancing With The Stars … before and after the surgery. For a little added fun, the guy should dress as pre-op “Chastity” and the girl can dress as post-op “Chaz”.

2 Jay-Z/Beyonce Fetus
This costume will certainly scare the hell out of Will and Jada’s kids. The Jay-Z/Beyonce fetus is moving in on their territory. Get yourself a flesh colored spandex suit, toss on a blonde lion’s mane and a tilted Yankees cap, and voila! You’re a fetus mogul in the making. For added effect, build yourself an umbilical cord and walk away saying “Uh huh, uh huh” way too much.

1 Zombies!
Zombies are in every year. This Halloween, however, there were a lot of major deaths that made headlines…giving you an assortment of zombie options:

1a. Osama bin Laden
This is going to be a very popular costume this year. If you want to attempt to one up everyone else, see if you can get six of your friends to dress up as seals with guns… as in SEAL Team Six… get it?!… never mind.

1b. Muammar Gadafhi
Dress up as everyone’s favorite fashionista dictator. If you’re the kind of zombie that likes to wear sunglasses and dress ridiculously, then this is the choice for you.

1c. Steve Jobs
It’s up to you to decide if this one is “too soon” or not. But a pair of jeans, a black turtleneck, an iPod, and some serious zombie make-up are all you really need to get Jobs alive and kicking again.

1d. Lindsay Lohan
Okay, she didn’t actually die this year (shocking, I know)… but have you seen her lately?! She looks like one of those moaning extras straight out of an episode of The Walking Dead. Start your meth binge now, so your body will be in perfect condition by Halloween. Or… if you want, you can always just go as Lohan’s career, since it’s been dead for years.

Since we crank out so many stories each week some really good ones get lost in the cracks. And since so many new people visit Guyism every day (thank you), we thought we’d take some time on the weekends to share a few classics that many of our newer readers may have missed.

When it comes to All Hallow’s Eve, pumpkin carving is a time-honored tradition. However, while most of us are content to simply slice a boring, old smiley face out of our big giant gourds, the more motivated artiste has the potential to create some truly amazing artwork. Below are 30 creative, funny and completely awesome pumpkin carvings.

30 Pumpkin-Eating Pumpkin
I know certain animals eat they’re young, but this is the first time I’ve ever witnessed it among the pumpkin population.

Source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/23527193@N05

29 House Lupus Pumpkin
Even in pumpkin form, Dr. House knows that it’s never lupus.

Source: http://www.deviantart.com/?order=11&offset=48&offset=96#/d317kw0

28 Nightmare Before Christmas Pumpkin
With the amount of detail on this carving, Jack Skellington himself would be proud to display it at his Halloween celebration.

27 Epic Tiger Pumpkin
Another great example of just how much realism can be achieved with a simple orange fruit.

26 Carousel Pumpkin
This pumpkin is 360-degrees of awesome.

25 Beetlejuice Pumpkin
This gem of a pumpkin carving is “Smoookin!” (Wait, wrong movie.)

Source: http://1stcomesthefall.tumblr.com

24 Pokemon Pikachu Pumpkin
I can just imagine all that candle flickering giving Pikachu a nice, perpetual electric shock appeal.

23 Charizard Pumpkin
Another Pokemon pumpkin carving that seems a little more scientifically accurate (Charizard is a fire-type, after all).

22 Death Star Pumpkin
Something tells me this pumpkin only has one weak spot.

21 R2D2 Pumpkin
This is not the pumpkin you are looking for.

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]]> http://guyism.com/lifestyle/30-super-awesome-pumpkin-carvings.html/feed 15 awesome pumpkin carvings pumpkin eating pumpkin House lupus pumpkin carving nightmare before christmas pumpkin epic tiger pumpkin carousel pumpkin beetlejuice pumkin pokemon pikachu pumpkin charizard pumpkin death star pumpkin r2d2 pumpkin http://guyism.com/humor/nyc-halloween-shop-rickys-thought-a-sexy-eating-disorder-costume-was-a-good-idea.html http://guyism.com/humor/nyc-halloween-shop-rickys-thought-a-sexy-eating-disorder-costume-was-a-good-idea.html#comments Wed, 21 Sep 2011 20:57:08 +0000 Chris Spags http://guyism.com/?p=159512 Ricky’s is a popular retailer of Halloween costumes in the NY area and, today, their online shop unveiled a costume that was a bit ill-advised. Long live the undeniably tasteless “Anna Rexia” Halloween costume.

The costume was pulled by Ricky’s a day after being put online (though it’s still available via other retailers, even in plus-sized versions!). Spokespeople for eating disorder advocacy groups were on the case immediately, telling the Village Voice, “It makes light of something really serious. It’s hard for us to find it funny.”

Personally, I have more of a problem with the lazy reappropriation of slutty skeleton costumes. If you’re going to parody eating disorders, pissing off hundreds of thousands of people across the country who’ve suffered from the serious illnesses, at least be a little creative. “Bulimia Betty” with a sexy puke bucket and rotting flesh, yes. “Anna Rexia” with a half-assed skeleton dress and a bone-in-the-hair that only makes me thing of Pebbles from The Flintstones? Not so much.

Ricky’s Is Selling an ‘Anna Rexia’ Halloween Costume [Village Voice via Buzzfeed]

]]> http://guyism.com/humor/nyc-halloween-shop-rickys-thought-a-sexy-eating-disorder-costume-was-a-good-idea.html/feed 0 anna-rexia-halloween-costume http://guyism.com/sports/brett-favre-injured-maurice-lucas-dies.html http://guyism.com/sports/brett-favre-injured-maurice-lucas-dies.html#comments Mon, 01 Nov 2010 12:58:47 +0000 A. Isaac http://guyism.com/?p=94620 Guyism’s daily look at what’s hot in the world of sports.

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As if things weren’t already bad for the Notre Dame program, now star QB Dayne Crist is out six months after knee surgery to repair a torn patella tendon. Almost exactly a year earlier, on Oct 31st, 2009, Crist suffered a torn ACL. I’m guessing he won’t be holding a Halloween party next year to commemorate the event.

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Our wild and wacky neighbors to the north had one crazy ending to a game over the weekend. The CFL’s Toronto Argonauts and the Montreal Alouettes traded punts late in the game to prevent a game winning single point field-goal “rouge”. It’s a play I didn’t even know existed in modern play football. Naturally, I asked for help from CFL Yahoo! blogger Andrew Bucholtz. Trust me, it’s worth watching the bizarre play and reading his explanation.

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Former Blazers star Maurice Lucas passed away yesterday as a result of bladder cancer. Lucas, 58, led the Portland Trailblazers to their only NBA Title in 1977. The five-time All-Star average 14.4 points and 8.8 rebounds in 12 NBA seasons with Portland, New Jersey, New York, Phoenix, the Los Angeles Lakers and Seattle.

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Everyday for the last 36 years, Walter Byerly has run at least one mile. The 80-year old doesn’t really think about it much saying “it’s something I’ve got to do”. In totally unrelated news, everyday for the last 15 years I’ve successfully eaten a jelly-filled donut. I consider my accomplishment to be a much greater feat.

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I’m not sure I totally grasp MLB scheduling World Series games on Sunday during NFL season but nevertheless, there was a game last night and the Giants pulled to within one win of the championship. 21-year-old rookie pitcher Madison Bumgarner pitched a gem for San Francisco, holding the Rangers offense to 3 hits in 8 innings in a 4-0 victory. Tonight’s pitching match-up is the same as Game 1, Lincecum and Lee. For the Rangers to have any shot of extending this series, Lee will have to perform much better than he did a week ago.

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Ryuji Imada received a 26-stroke penalty for not adhering to local rules at a tournament in China. Instead of placing a drop (after a lift and clean) within a scorecard’s length, Imada opted to use the more customary club-length rule. When he was informed of the mistake, Imada told officials he had done it at least 13 times which resulted in a 2-stroke penalty for every occurrence.

8

Brett Favre was carted off the field midway through the 4th quarter after taking a brutal helmet shot to the chin but don’t worry folks, his start streak is still alive. After receiving eight stitches, Favre told the media that he will be ramped and ready to go for next week’s game. That collective groan you hear is from Brad Childress, whose head coaching fate now rests on the abilities of a 41-year old attention whore.

]]> http://guyism.com/sports/brett-favre-injured-maurice-lucas-dies.html/feed 12 Tulsa v Notre Dame CFL Maurice Lucas old people running Giants win Game four Ryuji Imada Brett Favre hurt http://guyism.com/humor/the-10-biggest-halloween-candy-fails-each-year.html http://guyism.com/humor/the-10-biggest-halloween-candy-fails-each-year.html#comments Sun, 31 Oct 2010 12:00:26 +0000 Shawn Norris http://guyism.com/?p=23540

Since we crank out so many stories each week some really good ones get lost in the cracks. And since so many new people visit Guyism every day (thank you), we thought we’d start taking some time on the weekends to share some classics that many of our newer readers may have missed.

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I used to love getting dressed-up and going out Trick-or-Treating. I loved running around at night and only having to knock on someone’s door to give me candy because, well, candy is awesome. HOWEVER, some people who give out candy wouldn’t know good candy if it bit them on the ass. Those people usually give out the following…

10 Candy Corn
Honestly, who the hell likes this stuff. It tastes like it’s made from paste and sugar. And I’m not talking Elmer’s paste (which is delicious), I’m talking that cheap generic stuff that you get at the dollar store because it can barely fuse paper to paper and you just know is made from the hooves of haggard old race horses that just couldn’t cut it down at the track anymore. It comes in bulk bags that even Kirstie Alley wouldn’t buy. That should sound your alarms when you start thinking about buying a bag.

9 Raisins
Halloween is about getting cavities and paving the road to adult obesity, not about eating dried fruit. Halloween isn’t about fruit, it’s about sugar. How many nine year olds have you seen completely losing their minds in a grocery store screaming, “Holy crap, they have raisins! I gotta get me some of these raisins! If people would just give them to me when I knocked on their door…” Answer: 0. In a avalanche of gummi bears, Snickers and M&M‘s, Raisins are a pariah usually destined to be banished to the garbage can.

8 Literature from Religious People
Look, I didn’t get all dressed up as Batman to hear about someone saving my eternal soul from the fiery grasp of “Satan’s Night.” Batman is not having that sh*t. He’s got a lot of houses he has to hit tonight and doesn’t need a speech about all this “Batman will be doomed to spend the afterlife in eternal damnation” stuff. I get enough lip from Commissioner Gordon, OK. Batman does not want your literature lady. Wait, hold on–is that the Bat signal? Gotta run, Ma’am. Don’t worry, Batman will be coming back to hear the rest of your speech when he brings the Joker to egg your house later…

7 Tootsie Rolls
Answering the question, “What’s brown, comes in bags of 5,000 and will get disgusting after one piece?”

6 Butterscotch Disks
Wait, is this WWI? Am I 90 years old? Really, I can take a handful of these? Wow. That must have put you out at least 2 cents. Wait what? You mean you have an entire garbage bag full of these that you got for $1.58? How could that be? Wait let me guess…because they are the most boring flavor of all-time. People with no taste buds still shy away from butterscotch disks. Butterscotch is for Friendly’s sundaes and octogenarians–not for Draculas, Little Mermaids and Dora the Explorer. Get with the program Grandma.

5 Circus Peanuts
Do I look like a fluorescent elephant to you? The taste of these things is like…I dunno, something wholly unnatural. It’s the only candy that if you take too big of a bite you actually cringe. I thought the circus was supposed to be fun and then you sully up it’s good name by trying to sell me these things. If I want circus foods, I’ll stick to cotton candy and Barnum and Bailey Animal Crackers. Just keep these orange abominations away from the clowns, OK. I don’t want anyone getting sick before the show.

4 Pennies
Oh, fantastic 5 pennies. I can finally buy that boat I’ve had my eye on. Again, if you are 70 years old, getting 5 pennies from someone in 1930 must have been like winning some sort of lottery. But, kids today have cell phones, Playstation 3 and Plasma televisions in their rooms. A few pennies buys them another half a minute on their cell phone plan. Besides, they don’t want 4 cents worth of pennies getting that metallic taste all over their Blow Pops. Get with the program folks! Halloween is supposed to be fun. People that give these away are the same people who would freak out and run to their bomb shelter if a trick-or-treater was dressed as the Grim Reaper. Giving kids pennies for Halloween…We fought the Cold War to prevent this type of stuff from happening.

3 Jujubees
Anytime a candy comes in the color black, it sucks. I don’t know many things, but you can take that statement to the bank…and take out some money for some dental insurance while you’re there cause these things will rip your fillings out quicker than a Neodymium magnet.

2 Atomic Fireballs
That’s not candy, it’s sadism. Candy is supposed to taste and feel good, not incinerate your taste buds. And then if it’s too hot and you panic, you might as well strap dynamite to the tip of a jackhammer when you do this because your molars are going to explode into a fiery hot mess of red dye and tears. I’m pretty sure these were invented by the Japanese for use in WWII P.O.W. camps.

1 Dum Dum Suckers
People that give these away don’t even deserve my time. I’d like to beat that drum into a coma.

]]> http://guyism.com/humor/the-10-biggest-halloween-candy-fails-each-year.html/feed 32 halloween-candy-fails candy-corn raisins religious brochure Tootsie rolls butterscotch disks circus peanuts pennies juju bees atomic fireballs dum dum pop man http://guyism.com/humor/video-this-is-what-happens-when-you-drop-a-1200-lb-pumpkin-onto-a-car.html http://guyism.com/humor/video-this-is-what-happens-when-you-drop-a-1200-lb-pumpkin-onto-a-car.html#comments Thu, 28 Oct 2010 14:26:18 +0000 Chris Spags http://guyism.com/?p=94139 People are starving across the globe. Meanwhile, in America, an 1,169-pound pumpkin was dropped 150 feet off a crane onto a car in Utah. USA USA.

Publicity stunts are kind of ridiculous. I get that pumpkins are timely since it’s Halloween. I get that this is a very large pumpkin. But why drop it on a car? What does that accomplish? That’s like if I say I’m going to do an event to celebrate Halloween, gather 1,000 school kids dressed up like witches and zombies, and then I punch them all in the face. Like, yeah, it’s related, but this isn’t really a celebration of anything, is it? Great video though it may be.

]]> http://guyism.com/humor/video-this-is-what-happens-when-you-drop-a-1200-lb-pumpkin-onto-a-car.html/feed 5 http://guyism.com/humor/7-tasteless-halloween-costumes-for-2010.html http://guyism.com/humor/7-tasteless-halloween-costumes-for-2010.html#comments Thu, 28 Oct 2010 12:00:46 +0000 Max Steven Miller http://guyism.com/?p=93936

Halloween is only a few days away and many of you are still scrambling around trying to figure out a costume. Instead of breaking out your cheesy “This IS my Halloween Costume” t-shirt, you might want to try one of these tasteless gems on for size. They’re all abnormal, yet relevant to the past year. And nothing is more satisfying than when people don’t approve of something you yourself find incredibly funny.

7 Lamar Odom/Khloe Kardashian Costume
The good ol’ half man/half woman costume is nothing new. The problem with this costume is that one half always looks awkward because men and women aren’t usually the same size. Well, this problem is immediately solved if you dress as Lakers forward, Lamar Odom and his oversized wife, Khloe Kardashian. All of a sudden, your broad shoulders are no longer an issue. You can also pull off the same type of costume if you choose to dress as Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian’s ass.

6 Ex-BP CEO Tony Hayward Costume
This costume is more in the acting you’ll do than in the costume itself. Just break out a suit and toss on a helmet with the BP logo on it. From the minute you walk into whatever party you attend, start spilling liquids everywhere. Apologize repeatedly and proclaim that you wish this would all end and that you’d “like your life back”. Then continue to enjoy yourself at the party while everyone else scrambles to clean up the mess you’ve made.

5 The Michael Vick Comeback Costume
Yes, Michael Vick is finally back making some headlines that don’t have anything to do with animal cruelty. Unless you count the beatings he gave to the Lions and Jaguars this season. But this might be a good time to save some money and recycle your costume from 2007. Grab a sharpie, cross out “Falcons” and replace it with “Eagles”. As for the noose wrapped around your stuff toy dog’s neck, just replace that sucker with a leash and you’ve been successfully rehabbed and reinvented.

4 STD Snooki Costume
There’s no question that there will be Jersey Shore costumes all over the place this Halloween. So, how do you make yourself stand out in a room full of fist-pumpers? Run to the make-up store and grab some of those latex scars. Apply them to your lips and BOOM!… You’re STD Snooki. And you’re probably a lot more authentic than everyone else dressed as her.

3 Cheating Chilean Miner Costume
Perhaps the most memorable of all the Chilean miner stories was the one who asked both his wife and his mistress to meet him when he was rescued. Ask two of your female friends to join you on this one. Grab yourself a mining helmet and some sunglasses. Have one of your girls dress as your wife in a bathrobe, curlers, and carry around a rolling pin (basically be as sexist as possible), while the mistress girl should get all made up and dress a little skanky. In every picture you take, have your wife hitting you over the head with her rolling pin while you make out with your mistress.

2 SCRAM Bracelet Lindsay Lohan Costume
Women use Halloween as an excuse to dress incredibly provocative and get absolutely hammered. That’s why this costume is perfect for doing both. Wear revealing clothing (underwear is best left at home), get wrecked, and when people accuse you of being drunk, deny it while you point to your SCRAM bracelet and claim that it’s just your perfume setting it off.

1 Tiger Woods Costume
It might be old news by now, but this is the first Halloween that you’ll be able to grab your Nike visor and golf club to dress as everyone’s favorite womanizing golfer since the big Thanksgiving incident. Grab a bunch of Velcro and some naked Barbie dolls, attach them all over your body, and spend most of your time texting. If you want to borrow your Chilean Miner buddy’s wife for a picture, make sure to replace her rolling pin with a golf club to hit you over the head with.

]]> http://guyism.com/humor/7-tasteless-halloween-costumes-for-2010.html/feed 6 halloween-costumes-2010 Lamar Khloe Tony Hayward Michael Vick Snooki Chilean Miner Lindsay Lohan SCRAM Tiger Woods http://guyism.com/humor/cliche-halloween-costume-alternatives.html http://guyism.com/humor/cliche-halloween-costume-alternatives.html#comments Tue, 26 Oct 2010 12:00:10 +0000 David "Rek" Lee http://guyism.com/?p=93479

Remember back in 2008 when you went through all the trouble of acquiring that green vest and purple blazer, stood in the mirror for an hour applying makeup to your face, all the while thinking of how badass you looked as the Joker. But when you arrived at the club or your friend’s house party, you didn’t feel very badass did you, Joker #14?

Avoid these 25 inevitable cliché Halloween costumes of 2010 and try these alternatives instead.

25 Na’vi
Fact: there are people who actually fell under depression after seeing James Cameron’s Avatar. Expect these Pandora junkies to come out in droves to protect any willow trees in the area.

Try this: If you really want to go blue-face, put on a pair of glasses, a fake mustache, and some thigh-high cutoff jean shorts. Arrested Development’s Tobias Funke might not be able to engage in ponytail sex but he was a certified “analrapist” (licensed as both analyst and therapist).

24 Twilight
While the Twilight craze fizzled out, expect resurgence on the 31st as the pretty boys hit the streets as werewolves and vampires.

Try this: All right, if you’re a “fan” of Twilight, you obviously understand the secret to getting laid – ‘like what they like’ (we’ll give you the benefit of the doubt anyway). One problem. Fan girls of the franchise choose between Edward the Vampire and Jacob the Werewolf. Why limit yourself? Go as both (Vamp-wolf?), and maintain the right to do it doggy style.

23 Mad Hatter
The reason Alice in Wonderland became a story about a noble Mad Hatter is the same reason why the Mad Hatter costume will be a certified hit. Two words: Johnny Depp. Look at the Edward Scissorhands, Captain Jack Sparrow, Demon barber Sweeney Todds; every character he touches becomes Halloween gold.

Try this: The only way to stand out playing a Johnny Depp character is to keep things relatively ‘normal’. Roux is his role in the French rom-com Chocolat. That’s still not your everyday situation but compared to playing weirdo Willy Wonka, it fits the bill. Not for nothing, in the bromance comedy I Love You Man, Jason Segal tells Paul Rudd “I finally saw Chocolat… Delightful”.

22 Buzz Lightyear
Your favorite astronaut’s favorite animated astronaut will make a strong showing after stealing scenes in Toy Story 3 with his saucy Latin dance moves. Don’t end up feeling like Buzz when he first realizes he is mass-produced.

Try this: If you need to play Major Tom, consider Spaceman Spiff, the alter ego of Calvin from the Calvin & Hobbes comics. Like Buzz, he displays true bravery and deals with existential issues.

21 Darth Vader
One of the greatest sci-fi movies ever made is also responsible for one of the one of the most terribly cliché outfits, understandably. Even with the crappiness of the prequels’ Vader, fans hold on to their red light sabers and do battle with their respiratory systems.

Try this: Starkiller is the protagonist of the latest Star Wars video game The Force Unleashed II, and Vader’s secret apprentice. You’ll get recognition from your fellow fan boys, the beam from your light saber remains red, and best of all you’re rolling with the Dark Side.

20 Batman
Gotham’s caped crusader is a hero to multiple generations of fans. This means you’re going to encounter young Batman, old Batman, comic book Batman, Adam West Batman, Dark Knight Batman, and the list goes on.

Try this: Big Daddy’s (from Kick-Ass) crime fighting spree was short-lived but he still got it in. He took out thugs with a nice blend of weapons that included a shotgun and his own two fists. But the greatest accomplishment has to be raising his daughter to be a killing machine.

19 Iron Man
As a Marvel favorite, Iron Man always had his place on Halloweens. But we can attribute the recent spike in popularity to Robert Downey Jr’s flawless portrayal of the Stark Industries CEO, playboy, and superhero.

Try this: The coolest arm attachment next to Iron Man’s repulsor ray is Ghostface Killah’s four pound gold “avenging eagle” bracelet. Not really. But the Wu-tang wordsmith commonly refers to himself as Tony Stark and even named his now classic debut album Iron Man. You won’t regret it; the ladies love Pretty Toney. Just don’t forget your Clark’s Wallabees.

18 Super Mario
Super Mario has been a staple on the Halloween scene since his debut on the NES in the 80’s. Good luck trying to save Princess Peach along with the other Italian plumbers in overalls cock-blocking you. Where’s Bowser when you need him?

Try this: Sonic has taken loss after loss for a whole decade now. But with the newest addition (Sonic 4) getting rave reviews, he’s looking to make a huge comeback. Also, this costume makes a great alibi for premature ejaculation. Segaaaa~.

17 Ninja
In the popular anime Naruto, the protagonist ditches the all black jumpsuit for a bright orange outfit. It challenges our perception of what a ninja should look like.

Try this: If you believe in the more traditional ninja, go with the ANBU who still maintain a low-key presence and a dope kabuki mask to complement.

16 Mexican Serape & Sombrero
Danny Trejo in Machete, that is all.

15 Hugh Hefner
The Hugh Hefner can be spotted a mile away by the signature pipe and velvet pajamas. It’s great when there are women around with the classic leotard and bunny ears. Not so great when its just a sausage fest full of “pimps”.

Try this: Earlier this year, Tiger Woods got caught with his balls in more holes than one and a sex symbol was born. He’s still walking around begging for forgiveness, not very pimp-like, but reference the now infamous sexting transcripts for surefire pick up lines.

14 Chuck Norris
What, the jokes are played out now? Tell that to the legions who continue to pay homage to the myth, the man, and the roundhouse kick.

Try this: The only man who might be able to rival Chuck in outstanding achievements in being outstanding is the Old Spice Guy. Walking around with only a towel and a bottle of Old Spice shower gel for warmth might prove difficult, but that’s what separates the boys from the men, hypothermia.

13 Jordan / Kobe / LeBron
Jordan is the greatest of all time, Kobe is next in line, and (despite his decisions) is still a phenom. Don’t be shocked to see whole teams of each player.

Try this: Ron Artest of the Lakers might be the greatest orator in our generation of sports. After he helped bring his team to victory this year, he thanked his psychiatrist and plugged his latest rap record. An all-around entertainer.

12 A-Rod
The Yankees might have played horribly but that won’t stop true fans from representing the navy blue and white pin stripes.

Try this: To become the greatest baseball player on TV, you’ll need a mullet and some hard drugs. Kenny Powers from HBO’s Eastbound and Down knows how to do two things, throw fastballs and party. It’s the only costume that’s incomplete without jet skis.

11 Obama
Merely two years after being sworn in, Obama masks are still flying off the shelves. Something tells me America’s first African American president is going to hold down Halloween long after his administration.

Try this: When it comes to speeches, Jimmy McMillan of The Rent Is Too Damn High Party takes a different approach from our President. His quick tongue and keen sense of hearing (“you hear that? That was a baby’s stomach growling”) gave him a comical edge at the NY gubernatorial debate and that beard will make this costume epic.

10 George W. Bush
The Commander in Chief you love to hate remains popular because he’s damn fun to play, ask Will Ferrell.

Try this: If you want to put your political ignorance on full display, look no further than The Tea Party movement or Teabaggers (as they are more commonly referred to by the media). You can blend two costume ideas by combining a standard ballsack outfit with an Uncle Sam top hat and beard.

9 The Pirate
The goofy pirates from the world of Disney are cute, but if you want to be down with the modern day pirate; it’s all about rocket launchers and polo!

Try this: Google ‘piracy in Somalia’ or watch The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou for reference.

8 The Ghost
Still poking holes into a bed sheet?

Try this: Up the ante and take some cues from the ghosts and demons from Japanese cinema like The Ring.

7 Antoine Dodson
Hide yo’ kids, hide yo’ wife & hide yo husband! The warning heard around the world. The Antoine-endorsed official bedroom intruder costume consists of the same getup he wore on the news report (black tanktop and red bandanna), a custom hair wig, and an autographed rolled up paper to point at news cameras.

Try this: While everyone is quoting lines from the footage, go ahead and dress up as the alleged rapist. Feel free to create a “got bedroom?” sign.

6 Steven Slater
Another hot topic on the Internet is the story of Steven Slater, a Jet Blue flight attendant who gets fed up with a passenger. Before quitting, he tells the passenger off over the PA, grabs a few beers out of the fridge, and deploys the emergency exit chute. The extravagant end earned him more than one Facebook dedication page and a costume from Ricky’s.

Try this: If you ever watched stoner comedy Half Baked, you know Scarface is the real king of quitting the day job. Pick up the red and yellow uniform with the crown and cuss at a whole line of customers. “F-ck you, f-ck you, f-ck you, you’re cool… and f-ck you!”

5 Conan O’Brien
Conan has got to be feeling the love. After Jay Leno stole back his old time slot from Conan, fans of the lanky talk show host really banded together to show their support. Be prepared to see a lot of orange hairdos.

Try this: Being the villain is always more fun. Get the Jay Leno look with a fake chin and sell it by telling bad jokes in a squeaky voice. If you want to really master the talk show host’s persona, steal other Conan properties like string pants dancing.

4 Michael Jackson
The King of Pop doesn’t only live on through his music, fans carry on tradition by wearing red leather jackets with zippers or glittery black shirts complete with a lone shiny glove. Nothing says Halloween like Thriller, his biggest hit.

Try this: Kanye West is a true artist. But his habit of whining and singing badly disqualifies him from being the next King of Pop. Lady Gaga is also suspected of manufacturing her persona. So the only logical conclusion is Susan Boyle. A raggedy old wig and a set of saggy tits will make you heir to the throne!

3 Jersey Shore
Christian Audigier can thank MTV’s hottest new reality show for pushing sales of his tacky clothing line Ed Hardy; especially on Halloween when wannabe Mike “The Situation”s and DJ Pauly Ds flood the streets, pumping their fists.

Try this: But if you really want to exude party animal savvy, you gotta go with the Zach Galifianakis from Hangover beard with the strap on baby. ‘Cause If you don’t start off the night without rufi-ing yourself, you can’t call it a good time.

2 Justin Bieber / Drake
If you’re still in school, you probably idolize these teen heartthrobs. If you’re a grown ass man, you’re hoping to attract girls in a younger age bracket. Shame on you. Either way, don’t be surprised when you see a lot of people sporting designer shades where there is no sun.

Try this: If you haven’t noticed, the two biggest male teen stars are from our neighbor Canada. Try to get your hands on some border patrol uniforms and see what happens. Screwy logic or maple syrup happy ending?

1 Mark Zuckerberg
The Social Network is critically acclaimed and Facebook is still hindering productivity everywhere; out come the Jewfros and Harvard apparel.

Try this: So the Zuck man is in his mid-20’s and already worth billions. You can’t compete with that. Take the opportunity to boast about your mediocrity. Personalize the movie’s “You don’t get to 500 million friends…” slogan and apply it to your face with a white out pen. “You don’t get to (# of facebook friends) without making a (few mediocre accomplishment).”

]]> http://guyism.com/humor/cliche-halloween-costume-alternatives.html/feed 13 cliche-costumes 1 – avatar 2 – tobias funke 3 – edward 4 – VampireorWerewolf 5 – mad hatter 6 – chocolat 7 – buzz-lightyear-costume 8 – spaceman spiff 2 9 – darth vader 10 – starkiller 11 – batman 12 – kickass 13 – iron man 14 – ghostface-killah 15 mario 16 – sonic 17 – uzumaki-naruto-costume1 anbu 19 – mexican serape 20 – machete hefner 22 – tiger woods 23 – chuck norris old spice guy 24 – kobe mj 25 – artest nyy 27 – Kenny-Powers 28 – obama 29 – rent 30 – dubya 31 – Teabag Costume pirate costume 32 – Somali_Pirates ghost costume 33 – kaidan 34 – antoine 35 – rape 36 – angry-steward 37 – halfbaked 38 – coco 39 – jleno 40 – michael-jackson-costume 41 – susan-boyle 42 – the-situation-costume 43 – hangover-zach 44 – justin-bieber-halloween-costume 45 – canada zuckerberg 46 – the-social-network-poster http://guyism.com/humor/be-featured-on-guyism-and-win-400-for-being-our-2010-hottest-halloween-costume.html http://guyism.com/humor/be-featured-on-guyism-and-win-400-for-being-our-2010-hottest-halloween-costume.html#comments Fri, 22 Oct 2010 20:23:04 +0000 Guyism Staff http://guyism.com/?p=92876

Girls, looking for the exposure that our delightful site can provide along with a sick cash prize? Guys, know a hot chick and want to make a little dough? Well then, let us introduce you to Guyism’s Search for 2010′s Hottest Halloween Costume.

This year, Guyism will be soliciting your submissions to be named 2010′s Hottest Halloween Costume. The directions are simple:

-If you’re a girl, take a picture of yourself in costume. If you’re a guy, take a picture of any girl in your life (or any girl you see on the street, we don’t really care) in costume.
- Make sure the girl in costume for the photo is making the “Guyism g”, a gang sign we created solely for this contest. An example can be seen pictured right (thanks to the lovely Sooze from Babes Love Baseball for the Vanna White-esque assist), but, for explanation’s sake, basically you’re making an “okay sign” with your right hand and a curved “LOSER” sign with your left hand to form a lower case “g” to anyone looking at it.
-Submit your photos to halloweenshottest@guyism.com. We’ll accept submissions through midnight on November 6th.

We will then take the photos and put them all up to a vote of some combination of the Guyism team, our peers in the men’s blogosphere, and reader votes to crown 2010′s Hottest Halloween Costume.

TO BE CONSIDERED FOR INCLUSION, THE GIRL IN QUESTION MUST BE MAKING THE “GUYISM g,” PICTURED RIGHT.

The winner gets $400 paid out in cold hard cash.

Questions? Leave them in the comments. Otherwise, we look forward to seeing your submissions ladies and gents.

]]> http://guyism.com/humor/be-featured-on-guyism-and-win-400-for-being-our-2010-hottest-halloween-costume.html/feed 3 Halloween-contest SAMSUNG