Have you ever dreamed of committing incest AND are you a big fan of “Tales from the Crypt”? Well then, you have much in common with this 26 year-old named Andrew Bailey who’s having a surrogate child with his new girlfriend, his 72 year-old grandmother. Yeah. ]]>

Have you ever dreamed of committing incest AND are you a big fan of “Tales from the Crypt”? Well then, you have much in common with this 26 year-old named Andrew Bailey who’s having a surrogate child with his new girlfriend, his 72 year-old grandmother. Yeah.

Bailey tells Yahoo’s New Zealand bureau that he’s “always been attracted to older women and I think [grandmother Pearl Carter] is gorgeous. Now I’m going to be a dad and I can’t wait.”

The story of how the two met is undeniably bizarre. Carter was an 18 year-old who gave up Bailey’s mother, Lynette, for adoption in Indiana.

After Bailey’s mother died of brain cancer, he set out to find his biological grandmother, hoping to find family. Once he tracked down Carter’s address, he wrote her a letter. Then they talked over the phone. Then he emailed her a photo and they arranged to meet in person.

In 2006, they met for the first time. According to Yahoo, here’s what happened during their first meeting:

‘From the first moment that I saw him, I knew we would never have a grandmother-grandson relationship,’ Pearl remembers happily. ‘For the first time in years I felt sexually alive.’

I called Phil into my bedroom, sat him on the bed, and then I leant over and kissed him,’ Pearl says.

‘I expected rejection but instead he kissed me back.’

‘Making love to Pearl was a real eye-opener. It was love combined with all this sexual tension that had been building up,’ Phil openly explains.

In related news, I no longer have the desire to finish these raisins I was eating.

Carter used her retirement money to find a $54,000 surrogate who could give birth to the pair’s first child (See her thoughts on the situation here). Because if Carter somehow got pregnant, that’d probably just make things weird.

Best of luck to the happy couple. May there be many an awkward Mother’s Day for the loving family in the future.

‘I’m in love with my grandson and we’re having a baby’ [Yahoo Xtra]

Via Channelate comes this comic about trying new things…sexually.

Well, you know what they say about incest…um…I guess they don’t really say anything about incest. But you know what they should say about incest? It’s totally cool so long as your cousin is distant, hot and ]]>

Via Channelate comes this comic about trying new things…sexually.

Well, you know what they say about incest…um…I guess they don’t really say anything about incest. But you know what they should say about incest? It’s totally cool so long as your cousin is distant, hot and sterile. I mean come on, so long as you’re not producing some mongoloid or seeing each other for family dinner every Sunday, you’ve got to get that dick wet somehow.

Via ChannelAte comes this important reminder of what not to do during an acceptance speech.

This comic is pretty spot on, but it leaves out the very important reality that if your father is your co-star in the film, it makes it totally ]]>

Via ChannelAte comes this important reminder of what not to do during an acceptance speech.

This comic is pretty spot on, but it leaves out the very important reality that if your father is your co-star in the film, it makes it totally okay. It also makes you an inspiration for Southerners everywhere who will be stunned that you’ve found a way to get anything out of the situation other than trauma and a gallon of moonshine.

With the growth of lesbianism and, apparently, less guys jizzing into cups for their procreation benefits, regulators in Australia are concerned that there might be incest going on down under.

UNREGULATED sperm donation is leading to unusual situations in which the children of ]]>

With the growth of lesbianism and, apparently, less guys jizzing into cups for their procreation benefits, regulators in Australia are concerned that there might be incest going on down under.

UNREGULATED sperm donation is leading to unusual situations in which the children of lesbians in Adelaide are mixing socially – creating a risk of incest.

One of South Australia’s foremost experts in reproductive technology – Reverend Dr Andrew Dutney – says that in one reported case, about 30 lesbians were impregnated by sperm from one man.

The mothers then organised picnics with all the children, raising the fear they might socialise with their half-siblings without realising they are related.

In another case, a man’s sperm was used to produce 29 children, most of whom are living in Adelaide. They do not know who their half-siblings are, raising concerns that in a “big country town” like Adelaide, they could accidentally commit incest.

Pictured above, it looks like an adorable baby kangaroo. But actually, that’s the product of Australian incest. Crazy that it’d look like a joey, right? What are the odds!

I don’t know, people always act like incest is so bad, but what if you’re cousin’s like really hot? And who’s to say that having a flipper isn’t desirable? I’ve long been looking for a reason to not open jars for people. Nothing could top that more easily than going “Hey, I’d love to, but I got this flipper.” Then you high five a dolphin and call it a day. Nice life those kids have, I’d say.