Celebrity gossip items you may have missed this week…

— Kendra Wilkinson has yet another sex tape coming out, and just in time for Valentine’s Day! In this one she gets busy with some chick named Taryn Ryan. Anyone?

— James Franco also made a sex tape. Somehow I’m not as excited about that.

— Charlie Sheen may be the greatest partier in the history of partiers. It might kill him, but he’ll have a great legend to leave behind.

— Oh never mind, he was just hospitalized for laughing too hard at a TV show. I was way off.

— Jenna Jameson called Chelsea Handler a “dried up old whore.” Girls, girls! Can’t we just agree that you are both dried up old whores?

— Montana Fishburne attempted suicide? Man, just when she seemed to have it all going for her too.

— Kristen Stewart is complaining again.

— Jennifer Love Hewitt is never, ever going to get married.

— Jason Sudeikis is now dating Scarlett Johansson? Who’s Jason Sudeikis again?

— Did you know there was another Olsen Twin? I mean sister? And her name is Elizabeth Olsen? I guess she gets all kind of naked in some new movie she has coming out called Martha Marcy May Marlene. Be right back. Gotta go to Netflix and set my queue.

— Diddy is being sued for $900 billion worth of child support by a woman who claims he “knocked down” the Twin Towers and gang-raped her children over a casino chip worth “100 zillion dollars.”

— Lady Gaga wants women to smell like blood and semen.

— Speaking of stellar endorsement ideas, Ron Jeremy is coming out with his own rum.

— Speaking of alcohol, Jessica Simpson likes it. A lot.

— And finally… Andy Dick… also lookin’ good.

Today’s sexy video comes to us from Avril Lavigne who thought it would be a good idea to wear some lingerie in her new music video for the song What The Hell. Enjoy.

The MTV Video Music Awards took place last night for some reason. Not sure how you can have video music awards when no one watched music videos anymore, but I digress. As usual, since it is a lame awards show, many sexy babes were there including Emma Stone in the best dress of the evening. Also in attendance, shown in order below, Emma, Hayley Williams, Katy Perry, Selena Gomez, Audrina Patridge, Victoria Justice, Rosario Dawson, Amber Lancaster, Ciara, Ashley Greene, Jenna Jameson, Rihanna, Taylor Swift, Brenda Song, Jenni ‘JWoww’ Farley, and Maria Menounos.

Even more sexy pics from the VMAs here and here and here and here.

Remember the sex tape that is about to go public involving Kendra Wilkinson? Of course you do. Well, there’s even more news! One, it seems that Kendra’s sex tape involved multiple partners, aka was a gang bang. And two, Kendra’s husband Hank is reportedly thinking of divorcing her now. “Hank is totally upset and embarrassed. He’s so angry… The main reason he’s embarrassed is his team’s [possible] reaction.”

Speaking of divorce, Matt Lauer is also apparently headed for one. He and his wife Annette are “reportedly living apart and have been for more than two months, ever since [he] spent a string of “wild nights” in Vancouver covering the Winter Olympics.”

You may have read or seen this week a 17 year-old Miley Cyrus bumping and grinding up against a 44-year-old man. If not, go here. Now that you’re fully informed, someone asked Miley’s dad, Billy Ray, what he thought of the proceedings. Naturally he had no problem with it. “It’s what people her age do.” He went on to say his daughter was just “having fun.” Wow.

Heidi Montag called the cops on her mom. For reals. “Still reeling from her mother’s criticism of her intense plastic surgery makeover, Heidi Montag called police on her mother Thursday, claiming she was “psychotic” when she refused to leave.” At least her mom hasn’t disowned her, like her “husband’s” parents have. That day will come soon enough though.

Speaking of family issues, Cheryl Tweedy’s brother got arrested this week. “Andrew Tweedy was held just hours after the violent raid in which a gang of robbers waved a gun and machete at customers and staff before making off with thousands of pounds.” Cheryl is said to have been “in a state of shock”.

Taylor Momsen also almost got arrested this week for trying to take knives on a plane. Says Taylor, “I flew from New York to Los Angeles and still had a couple of knives in my purse. I thought I took them all out but they got tucked up in the folds. I went through security, took them on the plane, opened my bag to get my wallet in LA and they fell out. I was like: ‘Holy shit!’”

Russell Brand loves prostitutes. He also used to have a lot of groupie sex, of course, that was before he met Katy Perry. “When I was at my most promiscuous, I was like a charging locomotive…I had a team of experts who took care of finding women for me. They had very specific instructions. It was as if I was talking to a wine steward.”

Victoria Beckham apparently has really ugly feet. At least according to a recent poll. Yes, someone took a poll. 71% of Brits polled in a recent survey say she has horrible toes. In the same poll, 67% of respondents said Posh should have surgery to fix her feet. I just want to know who is looking at her feet. That’s not what I see when I look at Posh.

In other WAG news, Tito Ortiz will not face any charges for his domestic incident with Jenna Jameson. “The D.A. tells TMZ there was insufficient corroboration to prove beyond reasonable doubt that Tito had attacked his girlfriend Jenna Jameson. That could have something to do with the fact Jenna changed her story multiple times.”

Speaking of men with issues, Sean Penn was sentenced Wednesday to three years probation, 36 hours of anger management classes and 300 hours of community service after pleading no contest to misdemeanor vandalism charges related to a little trouble he had with the paparazzi last year.

And since we’re on the subject of men with issues, Russell Crowe is back in the news for his temper. Russell threw a hissy fit at BBC radio 4 host Mark Lawson when he asked the actor a question about his Robin Hood accent. Give it a listen.

And finally, a supermodel tried to off herself this week. Noemie Lenoir was found on the ground in a forest in La Celle-Saint-Cloud on the outskirts of Paris after allegedly taking a deadly cocktail of alcohol and drugs, the U.K.’s Daily Mail reports.

Further proving that “nothing really happened”, Jenna Jameson and Tito Ortiz headed to the beach this weekend with their twins (and I mean their kids, not what you’re thinking… though those twins were also in attendance). Honestly I’m not sure why I am posting these photos of Jenna in a bikini. Who here hasn’t seen much, much more of her in the past? Oh, you in the back… I guess that’s why I am posting these photos then.

Remember how I told you about Kendra Wilkinson was suing over the upcoming release of her sex tape? Well, it seems that good ole Kendra not only tried to sell that tape herself, but SEVERAL sex tapes. RadarOnline.com tracked down a lawyer who worked with Kendra on the project and setting up the company that was formed to sell the sex tapes. Wonder what new hubby Hank thinks of all this?

More details are coming out regarding the incident that according to Jenna Jameson’s story to the 5-0 didn’t actually occur between her and husband Tito Ortiz. She tells Us Weekly their argument erupted when he accused her of being “high” on pills. When she declared “I’m not on drugs!” he didn’t believe her and flew into a rage. “I was standing in the bathroom – naked, by the way – and he said, ‘It’s over!’ grabbed my arm and pushed me aside,” she recalls. Glad she pointed out that she was naked. That is key to the whole situation being cleared up.

Amy Winehouse was back in the hospital this week after another incident involving her new boobies. And you’re never going to believe this but she apparently hurt them “after she drunkenly fell and bruised them.” But wait, there’s more. Her injuries were described as “not serious” but her agent said: “She really likes the clinic so may stay a few days.” Do I even have to add anything to this?

In other news of the weird, Michael Jackson used to prank call Russell Crowe. You read that right. Crowe apparently shared a similar sense of humor with MJ and Jackson would regularly phone him and try to convince him he was in trouble. I guess if you’re doing a prank you want it to be believable.

The main character in the whole Jesse James – Sandra Bullock mess, Michelle ‘Bombshell’ McGee, has her sights set on porn star Gina Lynn. Hold on there, hoss. Still not in the way you think. She is going to box her. No, not the way you think. It will be a part of some ‘celebrity’ boxing match at the South Philly Bar and Grill. Noooww it all comes into focus. Sort of.

Speaking of cheating hound dogs, The National Enquirer claims to have uncovered evidence that Barack Obama had a fling with a 35-year-old campaign aide. The lady in question is named Vera Baker and it reportedly happened in 2004 while he was running for the Senate. You’ll note that a rumor about the President cheating is not the lead story here today. Not sure if that says something bad about me, or this country.

And apparently Justin Bieber fans have had about as much Kim Kardashian as I have since they threatened to kill her this week. And, ugh, the two ‘stars’ discussed it, of all places, on Twitter, of course, where “Biebs”, as the former Porn star called him, set things straight with his maniacal fans. Just kill me now, Lord.

In news that will surprise absolutely no one in the entire universe, Heidi Montag was serious about her breasts not being big enough and has already scheduled her next surgery to have them enlarged. Idiot husband Spencer blames it all on Ryan Seacrest, because really everything is his fault. (By the way, I’m not kidding about him blaming Ryan Seacrest.)

And finally in our weekly Lindsay Lohan update, LiLo’s mom Dina finally got her to court on the third try. Then proceeded to get completely hammered a couple days later. With her mom in the house. I don’t make this stuff up folks.

Kim Kardashian says she regrets doing Playboy now. “I’m sorry I did Playboy. I was uncomfortable,” Kim tells Harper’s Bazaar in a new interview where she is pretty much naked. She blames her mom for pushing her into it. I can see that. I mean, once the whole world has seen your daughter getting jackhammered by Ray J, what’s the point in being a good mom anymore?

Depending on your tastes this is either very good news or horrific news. I fall on the side of the latter. Chelsea Handler has a sex tape. She says it was meant as a joke. That’s right. A joke. I’m not laughing.

Jason Pfeiffer, a former dermatologist’s assistant and current CEO of a medical company, went public claiming he was Michael Jackson’s boyfriend right up until Jackson’s death. Yeah, and I was dating Lindsay Lohan when she died. What do you mean she isn’t dead yet? Give it time.

Paris Hilton is being sued for $1 million. The investors for the the movie Pledge This! say she didn’t plug the film enough and they want up to $1 million back from her. Investors who put Paris Hilton in a movie are now shocked that a) it bombed and b) Paris didn’t do as asked. Someone please put me in touch with these people as I have some great projects for which I need some funding.

In other skank news, Courtney Love says she had sex with Gwen Stefani’s husband Gavin Rossdale (that’s what I am calling him now since I don’t know if he does music anymore). Oh yeah, she says she did while he was with Gwen. She also claims Gwen knew. Now if you can’t believe Courtney Love, who can you believe?

Brad Pitt thinks Jennifer Aniston is pathetic. Apparently Brad was mad when Jennifer appeared on the March cover of Architectural Digest. “Brad feels this is all so desperate,” says an insider. “It was a ploy to get his attention.” Apparently Brad doesn’t have enough to do these days.

And speaking of smoking hot babes who can’t keep a man, Halle Berry is single again. According to an insider, it was Gabriel who did the breaking up and their 9-year age difference was partially to blame. In other news, WHAT?!!!?!?!!?

Heidi Montag might be addicted to painkillers. According to a medical source, doctors would have prescribed painkillers such as Demerol, Vicodin and Percocet to Heidi after she had 10 plastic surgery procedures in one day in November. Is Bodog or BetUS or anyone taking odds on when Heidi does her first strip club gig? Because I want in on that action.

Of course, we can’t have a week without some Lindsay Lohan news, can we? If the latest rants by Lindsay’s dad, Michael Lohan, on Twitter are to be believed LiLo has the HIV. The tweets were removed and Michael denies posting them. He blames Perez Hilton. Naturally.

Oh yeah, Lindsay also managed to get kicked off a film and banned from the club Trousdale within 12 hours of each other. So it’s been a good week for her?

And she’s also probably going to jail. There’s that too.

Whitney Houston’s world tour is going well. Hundreds of people walked out in disgust at her Docklands O2 Arena concert this week. She did manage to stay onstage for the majority of the two-hour show so give her points for that.

And remember how Jenna Jameson and Tito Ortiz had a little “dispute” the other day? Apparently it was some kind of misunderstanding. At least if you listen to the two of them now. “She is doing nothing,” Jameson’s attorney Ronald Richards told E! News , saying that despite her caught-on-camera vow to press charges, she never had any intention to do so. I’m actually speechless.

And while domestic abuse is certainly not a laughing matter, color me shocked that a MMA fighter and a porn star are having domestic problems.

Here is video of Jenna Jameson opening up to a TMZ crew about the altercation

For more Jenna Jameson, click here.

For more Jenna Jameson, click this.

Ready? Your 10 winners include four soccer WAGs, one NBA WAG, two MLB WAGs, one racing WAG, and one MMA WAG and are as follows…

1. Cheryl Tweedy Cole
Cheryl Tweedy Cole is a British singer and member of the band Girls Aloud married to Chelsea and England football player Ashley Cole.

11. Adriana Lima
Adriana Lima is a Brazilian model best known as a Victoria’s Secret Angel since 2000 and a spokesmodel for Maybelline cosmetics currently dating Serbian professional basketball player Marko Jaric.

23. Jennifer Walcott
Jennifer Walcott is an American glamour model and actress best known as a centerfold in Playboy magazine engaged to NFL free agent safety Adam Archuleta.

38. Jessica Simpson
Jessica Simpson is an American singer and actress currently dating NFL quarterback Tony Romo.

45. Valentina Zambrotta
Valentina Zambrotta is a competitive downhill inline skater married to AC Milan defender Gianluca Zambrotta.

58. Rachel Cole
Rachel Cole is a former gymnast turned model rumored to be dating Ilford FC footballer Jonathan West.

61. Laura Cover
Laura Cover is an American model and actress married to baseball player Aaron Boone.

71. Jodi Ann Paterson
Jodi Ann Paterson is an American model and actress married to American retired CART and Formula One driver and current Indy Racing League team owner Michael Andretti.

88. Amii Grove
Amii Grove is an English glamour model and Page Three Girl engaged to Liverpool F.C. winger Jermaine Pennant.

99. Jenna Jameson
Jenna Jameson is an American pornographic actress currently dating mixed martial artist and former UFC champion Tito Ortiz.

on 205th’s rankings and the voting results as of this posting…
1-10 | 11-20 | 21-30 | 31-40 | 41-50 | 51-60 | 61-70 | 71-80 | 81-90 | 91-100

So how is 2009 shaping up for the world of WAGdom? I’d say it’s looking pretty good. I went through my extensive files and pulled the 100 ladies currently in some sort of relationship with an athlete in the sporting world and ranked them how I see fit (it’s my site). Keep in mind though, the ladies on this list have to be currently in a relationship so sadly we won’t have any more Nereida or Eliza. And somehow Alyssa Milano is not with another baseball player so she isn’t on this list either.

You will most assuredly disagree with my rankings so I am going to let you do a little voting. I am all for letting The People have their say. Here’s how it’ll go down: We’ll do this in 10 posts of 10 WAGs each with you picking the one you think is the hottest from each group of 10 then one big WAG blowout at the end to determine which babe is the #1 seed going into the new year.

And when we’re through here, you’ll have a spiffy photo collection of over 550 pics of hot WAGs for your spanking viewing pleasure. Sound good? Alright, let’s get this party started (poll at the bottom)…

100. Pilar Sanders
Pilar Sanders is the wife of former National Football League cornerback, Major League Baseball outfielder, and current NFL Network commentator Deion Sanders.

99. Jenna Jameson
Jenna Jameson is an American pornographic actress currently dating mixed martial artist and former UFC champion Tito Ortiz.

98. Candace Cameron Bure
Candace Cameron Bure is an American actress married to former Russian ice hockey player Valeri Bure.

97. Nicola Tappenden
Nicola Tappenden is an English Page 3 Girl and glamour model and fiancé of English footballer Simon Walton.

96. Louise Redknapp
Louise Redknapp is an English singer and television presenter, known as a member of the girl group Eternal and the wife of English footballer-turned-pundit Jamie Redknapp.

95. Jennie Finch
Jennie Finch is an American softball player married to free agent professional baseball pitcher Casey Daigle.

94. Carol Alt
Carol Alt is an American model and actress currently in a relationship with Russian ice hockey player Alexei Yashin.

93. Lisa Guerrero
Lisa Guerrero is an American sports broadcaster, actress, host and model married to former professional baseball pitcher Scott Erickson.

92. Maria Beatriz Anthony
Maria Beatriz Anthony is an engineer currently dating Brazilian professional footballer Ronaldo.

91. Gabrielle Reece
Gabrielle Reece is an American professional volleyball player, sports announcer, and fashion model married to Hawaiian big-wave surfer Laird Hamilton.

Now get your vote on!

We’ll be back in a couple of days with #’s 81-90.

on 205th recommends: SCREENJUNK