Ninja Turtles

9 wholly unnecessary licensed children’s products

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Just because kids are idiots who’ll buy anything with their favorite character’s face slapped on the box doesn’t mean that toy companies should take advantage of them. Here’s some of the most odious licensed crap to have ever been hawked as “fun” or “worth buying”. Read more

Ninja Turtle robs a Wendy’s in Wisconsin

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ninja turtle robber

For years, the media has presented Ninja Turtles, both teenage and mutant or otherwise, as heroes for our generation. But it may be time to reassess that view after seeing this story about a renegade turtle who robbed a Wendy’s in Rib Mountain, Wisconsin. Read more

9 of the most eerily cultlike kids shows

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powerrangers

These days, children’s TV doesn’t take many chances. Shows are so concerned with being boycotted or sued that you get stuff like Dora the Explorer hanging out with a talking map cleverly named “Map”. But it hasn’t always been that way. Check out these shows and some of the creepy cultlike premises they were based ... Read more

VIDEO: Fan-made “Ninja Turtles” prequel is dark, pretty well done

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With the news that the fan-made “Mortal Kombat: Rebirth” trailer will lead to a series of webisodes, now seems like as good a time as ever to make a trailer of your favorite concept. Another team is trying that with a darker version of “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles”. The effort is not too shabby. Read more

The 11 dumbest things cartoons have taught us

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Psychologists say that children can be deeply affected by some of the media they take in growing up. So these staples of cartoons that we all watched probably weren’t the best things for us to learn. Read more

VIDEO: Another turtle rapes another shoe

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turtle-rape-shoe

It’s my duty to post this because I’m killing time until the weekend there’s nothing interesting going on right now turtles are a menace that must be addressed. First there was one video of a turtle raping a shoe, now another. When will the madness end? Read more

Barbara Walters interviews the Ninja Turtles

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Barbara Walters was once the purported beacon of interesting interviews on celebrities. But her journalistic skills were never quite as apparent as in this video, an interview with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Read more

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are hard to make

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Via Explosm comes this comic about the real life results of trying to make my childhood heroes, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Read more

When a turtle loves a shoe

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Animals attempting to ejaculate is really amusing to me, so long as it’s not happening above my face. Not sure if this tops the masturbating chihuahua, but this turtle attempting to f a shoe is pretty awesome. I know I don’t say this often enough, but man turtle dicks look weird. It was like he ... Read more