Quick, who is Kimberly Wyatt? And why does she appear in lingerie in the April issue of Loaded? If you said she is a member of the Pussycat Dolls, give yourself a pat on the ass. I had to go back through my old posts to remind myself. Plus she was blonde back then. I don’t know if she’s any good as a singer, but she definitely has the skills to be a success in some form of visual media…

I don’t remember Nicole Scherzinger and the Pussycat Dolls being involved in the movie Slumdog Millionaire, but lo and behold there she was all dressed up in Indian garb and singing Jai Ho on Jimmy Fallon’s show. Did I have a brain aneurysm that deleted their involvement in the movie from my mind or something? (Video of the surreal appearance after the jump.)

More Nicole Scherzinger stuff here.

2) Uh, baby got back

3) Half-naked women

4) This lessens the odds of promoters trying to book hometown product T-Baby with her infamous single “Its so cold in the D”

5) Speaking of cold, and I’m not trying to sound perverted here…ok fine, I will….Scantily clad women in the outdoors in temperatures in the 40s or 50s…uh yea, nerky pipples.

Who’s comin with me?

I know that ever since Nicole Scherzinger became a WAG to the greatest F1 driver evah that the media overseas can’t seem to get enough of her, but people, have you seen all the hot women from overseas I have posted here? You can do better…

Now far be it for me to insult someone on a big day in their lives (okay, actually, that’s pretty much all I do. But still), but I never really realized that the Pussycat Dolls were, as a whole, so unattractive. I like Nicole Scherzinger even though she has a Nazi name that doesn’t quite work with her ambiguous ethnic looks. The rest of them…the black chick would be cute if she didn’t have a widow’s peak, ditto the pixie one if she didn’t look like a combination of Melissa Ethridge and a supermodel, the other blond looks vaguely like a man (and not a good one that would dupe me into paying $20 for a BJ either), and the red head probably has a vile firecrotch. I’d be more likely to jerk off to the Ninja Turtles than I would this group.

And I know the Pussycat Dolls are a popular burlesque group and not just a pop band, but was it really necessary to give them a lounge named after them? Why must lounges be named for exciting stage acts and not the people who built America? I’d like to see the Jonas Salk Lounge or the George Washington Carver Room. We need more polio and peanut-based places to drink.

Now here’s the problem with dressing like a complete and utter whore all year round…you shock and disappoint everyone by somehow appearing to be dressed conservatively at Halloween. The only way the Pussycat Dolls could have possibly upped their usual slutitude for a Halloween costume would have been if their costume included a hole to show off their vaginas and a retractable series of cocks (a pulley-based system I’m working on right now…PATENT PENDING!).

I do have to commend the black one for her costume. It’s hard to pull off dressing like Angelina Jolie, but she really pulled it off.

Now if someone can tell me where I can find a music video on television, that’d be great. Especially since MTV is so busy with their MOVIE awards and all.