I never got on board with the planking “phenomenon” and watching it develop with no interest in it was certainly odd to see. But now, don’t worry about keeping up since, as Videogum points out, Richard Simmons just totally ended it.

There are ]]>

I never got on board with the planking “phenomenon” and watching it develop with no interest in it was certainly odd to see. But now, don’t worry about keeping up since, as Videogum points out, Richard Simmons just totally ended it.

There are lots of questions here, specifically why this 60-year-old man is dressed like Tinkerbell. But here’s an even better question…in the YouTube comments of the video, one commenter says:

Richard,

My daughter is your biggest fan. She is very sick in the (some Pennsylvania hospital).

She is thirty years old and her lifelong dream is to meet you.

Could you, please, make that dream come true. Truly, she is your biggest fan in the whole world.

Her name is Melody.

So here’s my question: I’m 26. My mom did some of those “Sweating to the Oldies” tapes when I was maybe four or five years old. This woman Melody is 30 and has four years on me agewise. So was she a pubescent girl doing Richard Simmons workout tapes during his heyday? Did she find him later on in life as a teenager after his fame started to wane? I just don’t get how anyone even remotely close to my age bracket would become “Richard Simmons’ biggest fan”. That’s like if a kid today got really into listening to the complete works of The Cardigans. Word is their greatest hits compilation is just “Love Fool” played on a loop for thirty straight hours.

Celebrity gossip items you may have missed this week…

>>> Let’s get right to the Lindsay Lohan news of the week: Lindsay plans to pose nude with her SCRAM bracelet as part of an ad campaign for her 6126 fashion line. The same SCRAM bracelet ]]>

>>> Let’s get right to the Lindsay Lohan news of the week: Lindsay plans to pose nude with her SCRAM bracelet as part of an ad campaign for her 6126 fashion line. The same SCRAM bracelet that apparently can be set off by spray tanning. Which, in turn, means LiLo’s going to look like George Hamilton in about three days.

>>> Speaking of genius actresses… Megan Fox got a tattoo in Mickey Rourke’s honor. Now who says she isn’t smart?

>>> Nicole Richie — also not smart. Remember the DUI she got in 2006 for driving the wrong way on the freeway while she was high? Her probation was just extended a year because she didn’t complete the terms.

>>> Tori Spelling thinks she’s been in contact with the ghost of Farrah Fawcett. I don’t make this stuff up, I just report it.

>>> And the genius parade doesn’t end there… Britney Spears is messing around with her medication because she wants to get pregnant. Yes… we need more like her in the world.

>>> Amanda Bynes says she is retired from acting. Let’s see if we notice.

>>> BREAKING NEWS: Richard Simmons is gay. I don’t know what to believe in anymore.

>>> Jason Bateman is better than you. At least employees at his local Apple store think he is.

>>> Justin Bieber’s mom might do Playboy. Apparently Playboy has officially run out of women that men want to see naked.

>>> Mel B, aka Scary Spice, says that she has sex with her husband five times a day, which is, of course, a complete and utter lie, am I right???

>>> Rachel Bilson is going to be in a video game. Hopefully she is dressed like this and not in her usual attire.

>>> Robert Pattinson thinks I am a nerd, which is fine because I think he is a no-talent actor who happened to get really lucky.

>>> Laker wives Vanessa Bryant and Khloe Kardashian are apparently not in love with one another. Go figure.

>>> Remember Andy Dick? Well, his life is going just swell these days. And by swell, I mean it’s time to grab him in your death pool.

>>> Adrianne Curry has a problem. And that problem is that she thinks every facet of her life must be displayed on Twitter, including her taking a shower.

>>> And finally, in the best news of the week, Lady Gaga finally paid a price for wearing all that stupid sh-t she wears. Idiot… But at least someone famous finally had the stones to say what we’re all thinking. Thankyouverymuch, Mr. Seinfeld.

Making fun of Richard Simmons is like taking candy from a baby… only a ton more fun.